Sorry if this has already been started somewhere. I just wanted to hear other peoples views of the proposed bill in Calif. to make it against the law to spank a child under the age of 4.

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"Before I was a Mom I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body." ~Anonymous

This is a touchy subject..no pun intended. I am kinda for spanking, which I know is the minority. Not that I do spank. But for it to be considered "child abuse" takes it a little far. And to have a law against it takes it even further. Too far in my opinion. I mean, if you spank on occasion when the child is acting up, I think it is okay. All the time, I don't like. And the parents who use wooden spoons or belts, is inappropriate. But a quick spank to the butt, is okay in my book, or a "slap" to the hands to say "no", is okay. Not a hard spank or slap, just enough so they know I mean business. I know I will probably get slammed for this. But oh well.

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Stacey

The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us, and from motives of policy are silent when we should speak, the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls. ~ Elizabeth Cady Stanton

I am (generally) against spanking, but I don't think there should be a law against it. I think that the laws that already exist about child abuse are sufficient to take care of the situations where the spanking goes beyond punishment and into abuse. It just seems like too much intrusion onto parental authority.

When I was listening to how they described the law, it didn't really make sense to me. They gave statistics on how many children were "injured" per year and also how many died at the hands of their parents. To me that has nothing to do with spanking. I guess it has to do more with the difinition of it for me. To me, a spanking is a tap on the bum, not hard enough to leave marks or hurt the child, more to get the attention of the child.

This is going to turn into a spanking debate, no doubt, it always does. I did spank my boys when they were little. Not all the time, not hard enough to hurt them, but if they were doing something that was going to hurt them or they weren't listening, I would warn them to stop and tell them why, and if they didn't I gave them a tap on the bum. More to know that there was a consequence if they were being naughty. The next time, I would only have to say, "Do you want a spanking?" obviously, the answer was no and they stopped what they were doing. I don't think a parent should ever hit a child out of anger or if they themselves have lost control of their emotions. My boys are older now and I would never think of spanking them, now I can talk to them and take things away if I need to. But when a child is at the age that they have to boundries, don't understand that they have to listen to their parents, or are at that defiant age where they are just plain testing you, I don't see anything wrong with it.

I think this law doesn't make sense. What the law describes is child abuse. If a child is injured or, God forbid, is killed, that isn't from a tap on the bum. That is from a beating.JMO

In NJ, they taught the kids in school that if a parent hit or touched you in anyway way, it was child abuse and to call 911. Parents were afraid (including myself) to disapline at all and it allows the kids to get out of control. I've had the cops called on me by neighbors for just 'yelling' at the kids. And it was completely taken out of context...my daughter (at the time was 2) was out in the backyard when the boys were getting ready for school and left the back door open...I yelled upstairs to call them down for breakfast because they were running late and the cops were called!! When the cops got there and the explanation was given and confirmed by my kids...the neighbors phone calls were basically ignored from then on...

So it's scary for parents! I believe in a spanking if needed, or a slap on the hand, I don't consider that abuse...but when abuse is obvious and ignored...then I have a problem with it!

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"Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake!" - ANONYMOUS

Ridiculous is what I think. I don't think the law will help the children that are being abused. I refrain from spanking as much as possible because I do think it sends a mixed message about agression and hitting. However, if you are in public, you cannot reason with your child, you give a pat to the bottom and off to jail or a fine for you? What kind've sense is that. I think it should be up to the parent to decide.

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This is crazy.It sounds like someone was litterally trying to get you in trouble!

It is a touchy subject for me also.Children 4 and other IMO should not be spanked.I never spanked mine at those ages.There are other forms of disipline that are more effective.
Now on the other hand...if that child did something that would cause harm,I would probably swat the bottom with a hand one time and then put them in time out.
As for being called abuse,I think that is exagerating..sp..it.To me,abuse is something that leaves marks,welts or bruises.

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~~Sharon~~

I think there is a large chasm between spanking and abuse. A spanking is a swat on the bottom. Do I believe in beating my kids? In spanking them w/a brush, spoon or belt? Absolutely not. However, you can bet the minute he runs in the street his behind his going to sting from my hand. After I have his full attention, I will explain to him how dangerous what he just did was. I know I'll get flamed for this. I honestly think time-outs are not effective punishment for everything. We do use them for almost everything but there are times when you need something a little more attention-getting.

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Absolutely, positively, no flaming from here... I agree with you 100% !

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Flame me if you will, but that is ridiculous. I would not live in a state where I could not parent my child as I see fit. Spanking is NOT child abuse. Yes, there are a lot that take it too far, and that is sad, but it does NOT mean that THE GOVERNMENT should have the right to tell ME whether or not I can spank my own children. Deal with those who abuse...NOT those who DON'T abuse.

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