I need you ladies to help me out. I don't have any real friends to talk to.

Last year I went back to work. I started as a coordinator. My dh is the Ops Mgr. Since I was in customer service and he is in operations we see each other a lot. It is a very small office, only 13 people. Things were great for a while, then after about 3 months, they sent a new customer service manager to our office because she got booted from the Orlando office(one of her employees was caught embezzling), we are near Tampa. We pretty much did not hit it off. I was kicked out of my desk on a part time basis to be the receptionist. I covered the phones in the morning and the receptionist came in at noon. You know how it is, cut backs, yadda yadda yadda.... Well we didn't hit it off because as soon as she got there, she basically raped my desk by taking everything she wanted off of it. Ok, that peeved me a little. Because I don't really care if I have a flat screen monitor or a nice printer on my desk. But what really made me mad is that she did it without asking. I know she is my manager but come on, common courtesy would have told her that she should at least say something before taking anything off of someone's desk, right? Fast forward a couple months, they finally figure out that we really do need a full time receptionist and I no longer have to switch desks in the middle of the day. So things are going ok, other than my manager and I do not get along very well. She likes to make snide little remarks and is always trying to get me in trouble with the general manager. Finally in June, I took some time off to take my kids to the dentist, gave my mgr a couple weeks notice of the upcoming time off. I have plenty of vacation time, though I didn't need to use it because I had plenty of overtime to cover it. I have one particular duty that can not be finalized until 3pm. As my manager she is supposed to cover for me when I am not there. So I shoot her an email telling her what she needed to do for me. She gets mad because I told her what she "needed" to do. She send me a snotty email in response saying that I should have given her a little head's up on what I didn't finish. Hello? Isn't that exactly what my email said? So I sent an email telling her that I thought 2 weeks notice would have been sufficient. She ran into me in the copier room and blew up at me. I blew it off, I didn't want to run to her manager because he had only been with the company a few weeks. But her snottiness continued throughout the summer. Finally a couple weeks ago, she again said something that made me mad and I had had it. I emailed her manager and talked to him about her attitude towards me and the blow up in June.

So, this past week, they fired the other coordinator because they felt she couldn't do her job to the standards they want. They immediately hired someone else. Of course they said it was because they had to make some cutbacks. Unlikely story, the new girl probably makes more than the person they fired.

Then today, we had individual meetings, the 3rd coordinator who is also the receptionist will no longer be coordinating, she will be doing the receptionist duties only. So they fired one for not doing her job right, basically demoted another because she wasn't doing her job right and hired one person to do both of their jobs. It seems to me that the problem isn't the coordinator's it is the training they have received. Guess who trained both of them?

They have also decided that my dh will now be my direct supervisor!!!!!!! I am having very mixed feelings about this. We pretty much keep our personal life out of the office but we bring the office home all the time. I bounce ideas off him and sound off on him when she made me mad. Being my dh, he always used discretion when I told him things that were "off the record." But now, if he is going to be my manager, who am I going to talk to when I need to vent? The top managers said it wasn't because of the tension between me and my current manager. They said it just made sense. My dh and I do make a great team, but will that continue? I feel weird about it because what happens if I forget to punch in or out? It seems unethical to have my dh alter my time card. I am extremely busy and forget at least once a week, maybe even 2. Plus they are having hissy fits about overtime. I do my job very well but I honestly don't think it can be done in 40 hours most weeks. So when I go over 40 hours, we both get in trouble? I have never dealt with a company that would even consider spouses to be in this situation.

Ok, there's the dilemma, what do you think? I can't respond until tomorrow evening. TIA

Wanda

Wow, you're dealing with alot! I agree that it is very unethical to make your DH your direct supervisor! Very odd that they would consider this.

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i agree that they should not have your dh be your manager. that is just a recipe for trouble!!

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are u sure they are not trying to fire u or get u to leave. It seems they are putting u in a very precarious situation. you dh is always going to have to take someone elses side unless incredible proof otherwise. he will be told he is taking your side b/c he is married to u. KWIM?

I don't know what to say. Can u transfer to another location? Good Luck.

allgirls

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allgirls, mom to 3 girls

Wow. Most companies wouldn't even let husband and wife work in the same dept., let alone one reporting to one another. Very, very odd. Do you have an HR dept. to ask?

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This is a bad idea. (It probably was a bad idea in the first place for you and your husband to work together.) I know I wouldn't want to feel like I'm in a situation where my work life can carry over to my home life in such a potentially disastrous fashion - conflict of interest, office politics, work related disagreements, etc.

Find a new job. I see no advantage to the situation you are in and quite a few drawbacks. Both of you could potentially lose your jobs. . .

Just my $.02.

There is no way on EARTH i would want my dh to be any type of a boss to me..on any level. No thank you...he would love it a wee bit too much probably.

No, I don't think that they are trying to fire me or dh. I don't think that is even a consideration for them. Dh's management skills have done wonders for this branch. And my skills have greatly improved the branch's relationship with the military base. Transferring is not an option. The nearest branch is in Orlando, we are just outside of Tampa. If I really really wanted to go to Orlando, I am sure they would let me, but I am not interested in a 60 mile drive one way.

We have worked together fine for the last 15 months. Because my previous manager is always trying to get me in trouble, I am just worried that she will try to start something. Like for instance, she runs out the door every day at 5pm. What would happen if one day I happened to walk out at the same time to put something in my car, she sees me, I go back in to finish up for the day and leave at 6pm. Then for some reason the next day she decides to look at my time and then says that I left at 5 and he must have changed my time? I could see her doing that. I don't believe the GM would believe her for a moment, but then again it might just start that seed of doubt. Dh and I are very honest people and wouldn't even think about doing something like that.

The thing is, in the last week, they have fired someone because she was not doing a good job, took responsibility away from our receptionist/coordinator because she was not doing a good job and placed me under another manager. This woman only manages 3 people! It seems to me the problem doesn't lie in the employees that are having issues with performance, it is completely a training issue. I myself would have fired the manager that can't train. Because really with such a small office, why do we even need a customer service manager that only manages 3 people? Not to mention that if they are really wanting to cut back, this woman makes twice what I make and I am the highest paid non management employee.

hmmm- I am not sure what to tell you- but wanted to let you know that you can come here to vent away! Sending good vibes your way! !

You've been put in a really bad position. Major companies, and even most smaller companies do not allow anyone related to another person to be in the direct supervisory line - that is just inviting a lawsuit from another employee.

If this company is family run, however, all of the "normal" rules go out the window, because nepotism runs wild, and parents supervise children, spouses supervise each other, even siblings.

I don't envy your position. What you need to do, short of getting them to give you a different supervisor, is to be meticulous in documenting everything about your job - no offline conversations - put it in an email. You really need to cover yourself on this one. I know that you use DH to vent, and if he is okay with it, then what about having a system where he takes off his "boss" hat and puts on his "husband" hat - this could only be done "off hours".

And of course, you can always vent here.

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