stay at home moms

Kimberley · 07-10-2006, 03:03 PM

useless? or like what your doing isn't as important as contributing monetary wise to your family? what my sister said to me has me upset and i have been a sahm for almost a year now and i love it, i feel like its what i should be doing, but we are also alot less financially secure with me at home. we live paycheck to paycheck, but all our bills get paid on time, we just can't afford to go out alot or do alot of things with the kids that cost money.

kellynkay · 07-10-2006, 03:27 PM

I don't feel usless - but there are some times when I have felt invisable. Not so much from my family, but by others outside my home. Like in conversations when others just butt in, like what I have to say isn't important anymore - or that I'm not up to "speed" on things (which most of the time I'm not

).

caitlyn&michaelsmom · 07-10-2006, 03:35 PM

No I don't feel useless at all. Like you, we can't afford a lot and I wish we had more money but if I worked I would miss so much with the kids. The newest gadgets are not worth what I would give up.

mommy2~4 · 07-10-2006, 03:36 PM

Sometimes I have. Like after cleaning and making the house look nice, for 2 point to seconds. Then its a mess again or when I cook a good healthy meal and I hear yuck, I dont like this. Then I feel the cleaning and cooking is useless. It wears on me, sometimes more then others.

melissae · 07-10-2006, 03:37 PM

I understand the feeling, I have my days. You should be proud that you are even able to stay home with your kids. They really do benefit alot from it. Remember we are all here and we will listen whenever you need us to.

allgirls · 07-10-2006, 03:45 PM

I have the invisible to unappreciated. mostly by dh b/c I don't value others opinion as much. my mom was a sahm so she knows what it's like.

dh tends just to take it for granted. he almost never acknowledges they fact that I work my but off and never seem to get done. that's the other thing, it never gets done!!!! of course I'm not a clean freak and neither is dh. and when I say clean freak I mean that in a good way, not the obsessive way. he thinks time alone for myself is him taking girls to menards for 15 minutes so I can make dinner or going to the grocery store at 12mid by myself he is doing me a favor. ok, it sort of is, but maybe something fun for myself and not making me feel like he did me some big favor and now I owe him. okay I have to stop now or I will not speak to dh when he gets home and he will be wondering what he did. and besides, I forgot to take the chicken out for dinner.

allgirls

Z&E'sMommy · 07-10-2006, 04:26 PM

I know how you feel. My DH & I had always said that I'd stay home with the kids until they went to school but when it came time for it I felt guilty. I had a hard time with little things like buying myself diet coke because it was just for ME and it was paid for with HIS earnings buying birthday presents for DH felt like I was just picking him out something not like a real gift. I have since then told myself that I worked full time for the first 4 1/2 years of our marriage while getting ourselves ready to live on one paycheck I'll give myself 4 1/2 years at home with the kids before I feel like I'm not contributing!

bennis_mama · 07-10-2006, 05:15 PM

I feel like this a lot! My DH is so supportive but at times I just don't feel like he appreciates what I go through. And when I need to vent he thinks I'm complaining all the time. I hate that. Even though I have tried to go back to work, I just can't - not yet. I don't trust anyone else with my baby and even though it's hard I can't help but stay home with her.

we aren't financially secure but we're stable, I wish I had my own money sometimes though just to go to Starbucks or something stupid - you know?

JSEVEN · 07-10-2006, 05:24 PM

You know...i felt the same way for years...then I went work part time but it didn't last long b/c ...time management between raising our 7 kids, and keeping house, and also having time for dh...then keeping up the PTO at my kid's school. I was BUSY,TIRED and most of all it got stressful on the marriage.

I recently quit my pt job this year to be a sahm...loving it because...I can finally cook meals where it is not a schedule...u know what I mean. We have dinner as a family.

Most of all....I have decided to go back to school part time but ONLY to one class a week kind of thing...which means it will probably take me 3-4 years to graduate....but just as long I can be there for my kids and dh.
Mom of seven...13,10,9,8,6,5,2....very busy~loud home!

Oregano · 07-10-2006, 06:40 PM

Not at all...I take care of so many things it's not even funny. *Luckily my Dh is very appreciative of all the things I do.

I've known all along that I would be a SAHM. I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing and have no plans to go back to work. Luckily we don't have financial worries. I know it must be hard to be concerned about it but you're doing a wonderful thing for your family and your children in the long run.