We were over my inlaws this weekend. We were there close to dd bedtime so my mil offered to give her a bath there. No problem. So I hear them getting out of the tub. I go check to see what they are doing, and she is cutting my daughters bangs. I YELLED at her Do not cut her hair. She said but it is hanging in her eyes. I said I don't care you don't cut her hair. I mean the nerve of her, this is a decision a parent should make, not a grandparent! What are your thoughts? She doesn't know if I am letting her hair grow out or not.

I don't think I would have yelled at the grandparent. Afterall, it seems as though she was only trying to help. Instead I would have calmly told her that, in the future, I would rather she didn't do that.

I might have only yelled if it was my mom but I would be upset if any grandma cut bangs without asking me first. But now honestly after dd gave herself a mullet by cutting most of her hair on top short in July if any grandma took a scissors to it to make it look better or blend easier with the non cut stuff I probably wouldnt care.

I wouldn't have lost it over bangs. To me respect for someone is more important than hair. And believe it or not, cutting your daughter's hair was done out of love, not a disrespect for you. Yes, she should have asked your permission first, but it sounds like in yelling at her, you took it over the top. You could have let her finish and told her that in the future if she could ask you before getting the scissors it would be better. I'm guessing you have issues with her in the past?

These are my EXACT thoughts. I do think she should have asked, but I think yelling at someone who had just been nice enough to give your child a bath is probably not wise. They're only bangs. They'll grow back out.

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It's hard to say what I would have done. I feel that was pretty disrespectful, but she probably did have the best of intentions. I definetly would have been very mad that she didn't come to me first, but I know how much my dd loves to get her hair cut.

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Formerly known as Mrs12bfishin

I agree that it would have been more appropriate for her to check with you first before just cutting away. What if you were in the process of growing them out. I get along great with my MIL though - I don't think I would have yelled ~ gasped horrendously maybe ~ but definately would've expressed my desire to have been asked.

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I would have been angry - very angry. I hope I would have been able to control my initial impulse to yell at her for the sake of my child since she was obviously there witnessing this altercation. I would have tried to have her stop then have some strong words for her in private after dd was out of earshot. That is what I would HOPE I would do.

But, my mil refuses to give baths so I am safe. :D

I totally agree. Yes, she should have asked first, but in the grand scheme of things, bangs are pretty small potatoes. They'll eventually grow back. I hate trimming my dd's bangs; I would have been THRILLED if someone had done that task for me.

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"I learned the hard way that they all say things you want to hear." ~ Sara Bareilles

I would have point blank asked her " what are you doing?". I am not one to hide behind anything and I'm pretty easy to read. I think by asking that and using a very stern tone she'd get that I was not happy. I would then follow it up with "I'd like to know about any future plans you have for my dd before they are carried out". So yes, I would be upset...but I wouldn't yell at her. I would just bluntly ask her what was up.