How would you handle this?

memz · 07-13-2006, 10:29 PM

As I'm walking down the hall last night I hear my son knocking on my bedroom door talking to his daddy. When all of a sudden I hear him say, " You sucker. You weiner sucker." I was like what did you say? When he said it again I made him go into his room. I then go into my room and couldn't help but laugh. I told his dad that he could handle that one. Dh then has a talk with him. Well today he started saying it again. I know he does it for the shock value. But my question is do you keep yelling at him not to say it. Then he knows it gets a rise out of you. Or do you just ignore it and wait for him to quit. I know this sounds like a stupid question but not sure what is the better way to handle it.

Artie · 07-13-2006, 10:33 PM

I think I would just very calmly and matter-of-factly tell him that type of language is not appropriate or allowed in your family. That way he's not getting a rise out of you, but he knows the behavior is unacceptable. You can also make him pay you money or take away priveleges for each repeat occurence if the behavior continues.

Peachy · 07-13-2006, 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (Artie @ July 13 2006,22:33)]I think I would just very calmly and matter-of-factly tell him that type of language is not appropriate or allowed in your family. *You can also make him pay you money or take away priveleges for each repeat occurence if the behavior continues.

Great advice - don't scream or make a big deal about it. Tell him every time you hear it he has to pay a quarter or he has to do an extra chore or he loses 30 minutes of tv time - HTH

Oregano · 07-13-2006, 10:56 PM

You know, kids say things they're not supposed to say, it's just part of growing up. *It doesn't sound like he does this all the time, so I'd just talk to him about and tell him that it's just not appropriate and you don't want to hear it again. *Done.

If he continues to do it, make it really clear about how you're going to discipline him. Please don't wash his mouth out with soap, that's actually dangerous. With my kids, just telling them I didn't want to her that word, made them stop. I might have to repeat a few times but that's it. They know I mean business though. I hope the same for you.

LadyByTheLake · 07-13-2006, 11:07 PM

I agree with the others. Tell him calmy that you don't like that kind of language and you will not allow it. Take away priviledges (sp?) if you have to. It reminds me of what my MIL used to make my DH do when he was younger and would say bad things. She made him write the bad word or language until it filled the paper. So not only did he know how to say it, he knew how to write it too (not quite what she intended). I'm not sure that was the best approach!

BlueJay · 07-13-2006, 11:15 PM

Sounds like he wants to know how much he can say before he gets in trouble- just tell him what is allowed and what is not. I remember testing my parents- I believe in not letting kids know when you really want them to stop doing something.

Pat · 07-15-2006, 02:53 AM

I would talk to him calmly, about why it is not appropriate to say this, because raising your voice in a screaming or yelling, they tend to tune you out, I've found out from my sons. Maybe he is just testing his boundaries, to see what you will do to him. Hope things get better!!!

desertmom · 07-15-2006, 10:41 AM

The first time he says it is a test. I always calmly tell him not to say it and what is wrong with it. I also ask where he got it from - what influences are eating up my boy's innocence? It happens again, gentle reminder. Again, time out or loss of a favorite toy for awhile.

zookeeper · 07-15-2006, 10:44 AM

I would tell him you don't ever want to hear that kind of talk again and if you do there will be some punishment given. Taking away something near and dear usually corrects the problem.