While dh has been away I have been looking at myself in a critical way. About 6 months ago I gave up getting dressed in the morning, and would go all day in my pj's. I stopped wearing make up abou the same time. As bad as it is to say, I gave on life. I existed and only lived when it came to my son. Well, since dh has been gone to Kuwait I realised painfully that I am 50% (duh Andrea) of the reason we rarely have time together. I was doing good to shower daily, much less make myself desirable. Dh stopped telling me I was pretty, and I don't blame him. I was becoming a hermit. This morning I got up, bathed, put cream on my face that revitalizes it and makes it "glow" got dressed... EVEN my shoes!!!!!! And BRUSHED MY HAIR!! I know it sounds petty, but I had been almost a week without brushing it. I am depressed, pregnant, on bedrest and miss my dh. I want so bad to have the spark back. Any ideas how I can keep improving ME?

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I reached a point like that once...I was single, but there was probably a reason I stayed single too...LOL

It doesn't really sound as if you need suggestions as much as you need encouragement. You obviously know what to do to keep yourself up...you just need us checking in on you to make sure you are up, dressed, brushed and shoed!! LOL

My suggestion is to make yourself a list of things you want to do every day. Bathe, brush your hair, put on your shoes, brush on a little make up, etc. And don't stop until the list is done...even if it's 6 p.m. You'll still feel better knowing you've accomplished what you set out to accomplish!

So...today was a good start. Don't you feel better already!?

P.S. I just put a sticky note on my computer reminding me to check on you from time to time...so I'm on your trail!!

Im lucky if I get a shower daily so we wont even discuss make-up lol. I really think we all prolly need to take more time for ourselves.

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Mommy to Bailey 10/02, Brooke 9/04, & DJ 6/06

Check out my scrapbooking blog!
http://nevillland.blogspot.com/

I have the same struggles...it is easier to be lazy! I find that if I get up, shower, dress to shoes, moisturize and put on some mascara, it helps everything. If I just do that all day, i have atleast accomplished that. On really good days, I actually get a load of laundry done, or the floors cleaned, or all of the beds made.

Just take it one step at a time and remember to celebrate the little things. After you are dressed, have a cup of coffee and read the paper, or watch the show you love as a reward.

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Dottie

Mom to Michael 6, Matthew 4, Katherine 2, Ellen 1, and new baby EDD 10/29/08

It feels good to know I'm not the only one that feels this way. I had gotten to the point that I wouldn't shower, unless I couldn't stand myself anymore. It's hard sometimes to drag out of bed, chase a 2 yr old, be pregnant, and not have anyone here to help. This morning I felt better, like I had been re-energised. I have been upbeat and happy. I don't feel as depressed. There are SO SO SO many things that need to be done around here, and I'm not "allowed" to do them. I will admit that I haven't been on bedrest the past 11 days because I have no one here to do for me. I just don't do anything that doesn't have to be done. This in itself it hard because I have OCD when it comes to cleaning and literally broke out in hives earlier in the week because I couldn't clean and it got to me BIG time. I just want so bad for dh to come home to a new and self improved ME. KWIM?

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Well I can only speak for myself, but I know for me, that I have to take a shower and get dressed in the morning. Otherwise, I just feel totally stagnant, gross and unmotivated. It really helped me a lot when my kids were babies, somehow getting showered and dressed really made me feel like I could deal with everything else.

I totally agree with Oregano!! I have to take a shower and dress first thing every morning or I am no good for anything!!!

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~Happiness is a large family~

Me, too. I shower every single day...and wash my hair every other day (and if it is feeling icky or I pinned it up the day before, I do it two days in a row!). I also put on makeup at least 98% of the time, maybe more. I just don't feel good if I have not gotten up and done that. My hair, I will pin up in a ponytail or a bun on some days, but I usually do it with a straightener, too! Dh says he knows I am SICK when he comes home and finds me not "done up". As far as staying in pjs...NEVER...not even when I had my babies. I detested that in the hospital...and I got dressed as soon as they would let me. I feel better about myself..and I feel like I can go out if needed and look decent...so I always make myself do it.

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Shaking in my boots (well, if I was wearing them in the middle of summer!), but glad to be back!

Same here too.

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Mary

Are their any high school students that you hire to clean, run errands, etc? It would be cheaper than paying a cleaning agency.

Get up every day shower, change clothes, and brush your teeth (twice a day). Have you talked to your ob about your depression. I'm worried for you that it will get worse with post partum depression or do you think it's situational based on bedrest and dh being away? You have to do this for yourself, your child, and baby on the way.