There is an increasing trend for children to address adults by their first names, instead of a title and surname.

I believe it is a sign of respect for a child to use an adult's title and surname, even if it is only because the person is an adult. I think it reminds the child that this person is not his/her buddy, and should not be treated the same way. Our daughter has been taught to use titles and surnames, and several of her friends' moms have whispered to me that they really like and appreciate it. I cringe when an 8 year-old calls me by my first name. I don't say anything, because I feel that is the parents' choice.

Some of our daughter's friends have caught on, though, by hearing the way my daughter addresses their parents, and they address me with my title and last name.

A school not far from here is touting the fact that the children call the teachers by their first names... they are using this as a selling point. Why do we want children to feel we are on an equal basis? We aren't. We are the authority figures!

What about your children? And how do you feel about a child you don't really know addressing you by your first name?

Cheers, from
SwampWitch

Well, we are very Southern, I have been told. I am "Miss Claire" and my kids call my friends "Miss Carolyn", "Miss Melissa", "Mr. Craig", whatever. Teachers and authority figures are "Mr. Smith", etc., but friends are a bit different. I would not want to be "Claire" to a child, but I don't like "Mrs. Smith" either. I think it still instills respect the way we do it. It was never really a question as that seems to be what everybody does here.

When I was growing up, we called teachers by their surname, but Mom's friends were also "Mr. or Miss so and so".

I t doesn't bather me to much, but my husband expects the kids to, so that is what they use. We do have close friends that want them to use their first name so that is ok. I do have all kids call me by my first name. It is just what I like. I did grow up having to say please and thank you, and so do my kids, that bugs me more if they don't.

We handle it this way as well. Part of the reason for us is that most of the adults I have run into (DD's friends parents, neighbors, etc..) introduce themselves to my kids by their first names. We do refer to them the same as Mrs. Pennie, Mr. Steve, etc...but not by surname. The only one that has been more difficult is our neighbor who is also a teacher at the school...my older ones call her by Mrs. LastName, and my younger ones call her by Mrs. FirstName. That gets quite confusing

__________________

I let my daycare kids call me by my first name. I just think being Miss Leighann all day would bug me after awhile.

Teachers are Mr/Mrs Surname, as well as the adults at Church. With our friends to call them by their first names is ok with us.

I do make sure they refer to their aunts and Uncles as Aunt first name or Uncle first name

It seems to be the trend to refer to grandparents as Grandma Sue and Grandpa Bob. However dh and I both grew up to call our Grandparents Grandpa and Grandma Smith! (not their real names)

It sounds like you southerners have much better manners than the rest!

Definately Miss or Mr and first name. teachers I would think and Dr's would use there surname or title.
I absolutely hate hearing a child call an adult by there first name without a miss or mr in there first. I think it is rude. It teaches them respect of age and position. I as an adult wouldn't walk up to my priest and just say Hi Willy, or to the Pope.

__________________
"Before I was a Mom I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body." ~Anonymous

We're fairly new to the south and the Miss(Insert first name here) drove me CRAZY at first, but now our family uses it. Our children use the casual titles to our close adult friends, babysitter, and neighbors ONLY. Every other adult (school, church, etc.) they use the last name.

Some close friends Miss. & Mr. first names, all other adults (except family of course) Mr.& Mrs. last name. This is what we have taught our children, we expect the same from other children. IMO It's a matter/term of respect.

__________________
:love:R4JBNS Traci
Wife to Ben Sahm to Jonathon, Jessyca, Jordan & Jackson

I’ve been SWAK’d!
__________________
I’ve been SWAK’d!

Well, I tell my ds to call the parents with their title and 99% of the time they tell me to have him call them by their name. So I compromise and have him call, "Mr. Brian; Miss Dawn", etc. That way they are happy and so am I.

Now on the other hand, when a child is around 16-17 I prefer them to call me by my first name and tell them to do so. But when little kids do it (especially ds's friends - 5 for crying out loud - I HATE it!! But I don't say anything either, just cringe, because that's what their parents tell them and I don't want to correct, just like I wouldn't like it if they corrected my kids. I'd much prefer, "Miss 'Jane'"

__________________

Some of the teachers in my ds's school do this. I have no problem with it. To me they ARE equal just different, the respect goes both ways and to my knowledge it's never been an issue. I'm sure this won't be a popular response, though!!

__________________