This afternoon ds's friend brought up a few not so nice words. Now I don't know what my ds's conversations are when I'm not around but ya know 3rd graders think they know it all. I asked if ds's friend knew what he said meant and he said no. I told him if you don't know what it means then don't say it. I was thinking of telling his mother(we are friends) what kind of words he was saying and what he was talking about. Like I said I don't know how my son talks when I'm not around(I hope not about any of the stuff they were mentioning this afternoon) but I don't want it to sound like...DO YOU KNOW HOW YOUR SON TALKS??

Make any sense?

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Mary

Totally know what you mean. I listen in on my son all the time.

I'm sure when I'm not around there are bad words flying that none of these kids really understand, but I think the important thing is teaching them that certain language is not appropriate at certain times. Like church, school or infront of parents and grandparents.....such as three X-mas's ago when my son was helping his aunt open a present and realized it wasn't for him and he exclaimed Damn! Since is was my first X-mas with my new husband and ss's family they all looked at me.... sheesh.

I would let the mom know and make it clear to the kid that that kind of thing isn't allowed in your house, regardless of what is allowed else where. I have had to do that before.

Good luck. Dealing with other's kids is soooooo hard!

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Sarah

do you really want to know what they say...

hide the baby moniter in their room, and listen to the portable control.. But be careful what you listen to, you might get a wake up call..

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Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!

I probably wouldn't say anything...but that's me. I'd use it as a tool for my kids though, on how I don't want them to behave.

If you are friends with the mom, then I would probably tell. I would want to know what my kids were saying and my friends would know that. If it was a mom that I didn't know that well, I probably wouldn't tell, because I wouldn't want them to think I was criticizing their parenting skills (which you wouldn't be but you never know how people wil react) or because I would hate to hear them respond with "so what? What the $#*% business is it of yours?".

I would approach it from, "Hey, guess what your son was saying today? When I am not around does my son say anything like that?" Not in those words, but you get the idea. Make it sound like you are in it together because you sort of are.

If I were here, I would want to know what he was saying in front of you. JMO

If you are freinds with the mother I think that you should just come out and tell her what her son is saying. I also agree about asking if she has ever heard your son using any bad words himself. If she is your friend then she will know that you are jsut being concerned.

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~ Heather
Mommy to 4 Angels and 1 Earth Angel

Since you are friends, I would for sure say something. Just explain it to her like you did us. Than you can both get a handle on it from both sides and stop the kids from talking "ugly".

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I often have conversations with girlfriends on the topic of "Can you believe how grown-up these kids are starting to act?" I wouldn't say that the girlfriend's son was using bad language, I would say, "I heard the boys using bad language and I had to step in to put a stop to it." That way you're not accusing her son of being the one who did the swearing but you let her know that her son was apart of it. If she asks for further details such as, "Are you sure you heard MY SON saying bad words?" You can tell her, "Oh yes. That's what got me concerned because I know your family isn't like that."

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Since you're good friends with the mother, I would let her know what her ds is saying. If it was my dd, I would want to know if she said something innappropriate. You could say something like "I overheard the kids talking and your ds said a few things that I thought you might want to know about."

I had a similar situation happen a few years ago. I was talking to my dd's friend and he made a racist comment about the Tooth Fairy (of all things). I'm friends with his mom, so I told her what he said. I said something like "Your ds said _____________. I thought you would like to know about it so you could talk to him."