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Old 01-14-2008, 08:40 AM   #1
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momof5boys
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I know this has been brought up before in a thread, but I'm sooo mad I have to vent. DH's niece is getting married and our kids are not invited. The wedding is 5 hours away so we would need a sitter over night. I said I am not going and dh is pretty upset and say's he is not going either. His sister did the same thing to use 10 years ago. I understand if it was an adult thing, but there are other children invited. Some are not even related. I don't get it. Dh wants me to ignore the whole thing and not even send back the RSVP. Can't wait till mil asks if we are going.
Ok I think I'm done now.... Thanks for listening.
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:48 AM   #2
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I guess people have a right to invite who they want to weddings, so it doesn't bother me if we get invited to them without our kids. A lot of people prefer to have a more "adult" atmosphere. (although that doesn't make sense if other kids were invited). It could be a matter of having to limit the number of guests to fit their budget, which is common. I'm sorry you were hurt by this but try not to take it personally. If that means you can't go, I'd simply return the RSVP card saying you will not be attending.
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:48 AM   #3
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Quote:
but there are other children invited. Some are not even related. I don't get it
How old are Your Children vs. the other Children? I am Not Saying shes right or Wrong just yet. I am just trying to Figure this out.

This is the ONLY reason I can think of that Some " children" would Be invited and Not Others.

My 10 And 17 Yr. Old would Be still be "Children" But know How to Behave and would do Fine at a wedding.

My 3 and 6 Yr old children well lets just say They would NOT do fine and - I Would not want to Bring them if they were invited or not!!

Again If that is the reason - than that is their choice to Have it that way.

BUT -
If that isn't the reason here AND your Poor kids are being Singled out AND they are the ones that are Related!!??.

There is no question Here- You Just Will not Go!! Right??

Thats would I would Do - No Questions asked.
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:52 AM   #4
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Well, it would be incredibly rude to not RSVP...so I hope you're not going to do that! If you can't go due to childcare reasons, then don't go. If your MIL asks why you're not going, simply explain why.

I didn't want children at my own wedding, it just depends on the person. It's not rude, it's the bride's preference. What other kids are invited? Unless you ask the bride specifically, it's really hard to know and even then, she can have specific reasons for having some kids there and others not - I dunno, stuff like that doesn't bother me. I think nothing of it. Dh and I are often invited to weddings where our children are not invited. To tell you the truth, I'd rather NOT take them to a wedding as they'd be bored. They'd have more fun at home with a sitter, but that's us.

You seem really angry about it...is there something else going on?
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Old 01-14-2008, 08:57 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by Oregano
Well, it would be incredibly rude to not RSVP...so I hope you're not going to do that! If you can't go due to childcare reasons, then don't go. If your MIL asks why you're not going, simply explain why.

I didn't want children at my own wedding, it just depends on the person. It's not rude, it's the bride's preference. What other kids are invited? Unless you ask the bride specifically, it's really hard to know and even then, she can have specific reasons for having some kids there and others not - I dunno, stuff like that doesn't bother me. I think nothing of it. Dh and I are often invited to weddings where our children are not invited. To tell you the truth, I'd rather NOT take them to a wedding as they'd be bored. They'd have more fun at home with a sitter, but that's us.

You seem really angry about it...is there something else going on?
I agree. I took my kids to 2 weddings, both for my brother, and while we tried to keep them entertained, they were still bored.
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:02 AM   #6
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Maybe it's because I'm from Louisiana. I think it IS rude to not invite children. So you want me, my gifts, but not my children? I've got an RSVP for you.

As far as boring weddding receptions go, the best fun is watching all the kids dance and cut up, eat cake and have fun. The last wedding I went to, the kids were the main event! And yes, the bride is a grown up, so she was able to "deal with" children sharing her spotlight.

Especially if it's would mean an overnight stay, lots of baby sitting, I'd have to sit this one out, too.
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:04 AM   #7
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I agree. Sometimes people don't want kids at their wedding and that should be their choice. Even if they did invite some kids, but not yours, I'd just think it was b/c they didn't want a ton of kids or that they were closer to the kids that they did invite.

I think you should RSVP and just tell them that you didn't have child care available and therefore, can't come.
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:09 AM   #8
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That would really bother me also, but I have never been a situation where children weren't invited to a wedding! I really hope she isn't singling out your ds's. My first reaction was to be as angry as you are but the other women have made good arguements.

I would probably find out how old the other kids are and if they are considerably older than yours go ahead and go and think of it as a date night
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:10 AM   #9
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How Tacky. If you can't afford to have ALL the kids, then have NONE except the ones in the wedding (which I have no problem with). Personally I'd buy an inexpensive gift, not go and give my regrets. Have something else 'important' planned. I think singling children out is in extremely poor taste.
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Old 01-14-2008, 09:12 AM   #10
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I agree I don't like young kids at weddings either



I guess I am just trying to figure out Why - If op WANTS to Bring her Kids she can't But Others are allowed to Come?
If their is an age issue , I can See it though.
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