I grew up in a home that was fiscally irresponsible. My mother worked two to four jobs at any given time and spent all of her money frivolously. My brother, sister and I would always get a ton of gifts for Christmas, Birthdays, Valentine's Day and Easter. Even though she bought us everything we wanted she still complained about money all the time. My mom went from boyfriend to boyfriend and we moved a lot, so I decided to go live with my grandparents. I thought it would be better with them.
My grandparents owned a nice home and had nice things, I thought they were doing well. When I was sixteen, they decided to move to Florida. I thought we would buy a nice home and live comfortably. I didn't know it at the time, but they emptied their retirement accounts in order to move their stuff there. They had no savings. They had no equity. They were broke. To make a long story short, we never made it to Florida and all of our belongings sat in storage there for a few years. I came to the realization that if I lived my life like them, frivolously spending all my money, I would end up like them.
I decided after I married my husband at age 19 to take control of my financial situation and not ever let it get out of control. I read everything I could about money management and have been able to stay out of debt and save money. I saw the pattern in my mom and grandparents and decided it would stop at me. I want to set a good example for my children.
I feel like I was so naive and that I could have helped them if I had only known what their situation was.
My grandparent seperated last year...right after their house was forclosed on...

__________________
Debbie 3 years
Sadie 16 months

Good for you. :high five:

allgirls

__________________
allgirls, mom to 3 girls

It's Girl Scout Cookie Time

You stated that you were so naive and wished you could have helped your mother and your grandparents with money management. You were a kid! They were actually responsible to teach you about money. At least you know to break the pattern.

There are two kinds of people: spenders and savers. You are definitely a saver. I am a saver and my husband is a moderate spender. It is a constant pull in two directions. However, I have learned to be less uptight and actually have some fun once in a while. He, on the other hand, has learned that you don't always have to spend money to feel happy.

I have seen marriages of two spenders and two savers. Two spenders are like the grasshoppers, play all summer long and then freeze in the winter. I have married friends who are both radical SAVERS and it is ridiculous. Their children (6 children) wear clothes that have been patched over and over to the point that they look almost like street children (except they are clean). Each child (except the baby) has been with his or her father to an afternoon movie (cheaper earlier in the day) ONCE to have had the experience of going to the movies. I could go on and on, but two radical savers in a marriage is not good either. They are so busy saving that they don't actually live life without stressing whenever they have to open their wallets for anything.

Make sure you don't repeat the past patterns in your family, but don't be like my radical saver friends either. Relax and be happy about money - once in a while.