Gearing up for FTJ Bootcamp: Getting Spouse on Board

[Kim]

If you participated in the Spending Freeze last year, was it hard to get your spouse on board? How did you convince dh it was a good idea? Any advice for moms gearing up for the spending freeze this year on how to get their spouse excited about (or at least OK with) participating?

[booker81]

Waiting for tips!!!

I really want to do this with him this year, so we don't end up like this next year. If I could at least get him to do a spending freeze, I think that would be huge. I would really like to get more going too - a "real" budget, actually have a savings account with money in it, etc.

Help? Someone?

Do you approach it like "This is a system I think we should try out?" and print out each "step" (my DH is not only computer illiterate, he absolutely hates computers and will not touch it.) I have to print things out for him all the time.

Do you tell him you "heard it" somewhere and just explain the steps?

[Kim]

Here are some tips:

1. Make it optional. If you try to force-feed it to your dh, he's likely to rebel and decide not to do it at all. Explain to him why you're doing it - make them personal reasons - and see what his reaction is.

2. Give him some choices. If a total spending freeze is too difficult (and it is for many people; especially men) then suggest a modified spending freeze. Ask him what dollar amount per week he thinks he could get by with ($10? $20? $50?)

3. Be a good example. Show him that YOU can do it and that it isn't that hard. Maybe he'll be intrigued enough to join you.

[rskmom]

I think that marketing/selling it to the spouse can be helpful if they are resistant - lay out the possible benefits, remind them it's not forever, etc. with Kim, make it optional and give choices.

[mamaof3kiddies]

Quote:

Originally Posted by booker81 Waiting for tips!!! I really want to do this with him this year, so we don't end up like this next year. If I could at least get him to do a spending freeze, I think that would be huge. I would really like to get more going too - a "real" budget, actually have a savings account with money in it, etc. Help? Someone? Do you approach it like "This is a system I think we should try out?" and print out each "step" (my DH is not only computer illiterate, he absolutely hates computers and will not touch it.) I have to print things out for him all the time. Do you tell him you "heard it" somewhere and just explain the steps?

Jen - you just described my dh too! I am going to sit down with my dh and just explain it all and see where he goes with it! Hopefully he'll be on my side with it all!

[Kim]

Quote:

Originally Posted by booker81 Do you approach it like "This is a system I think we should try out?" and print out each "step" (my DH is not only computer illiterate, he absolutely hates computers and will not touch it.) I have to print things out for him all the time. Do you tell him you "heard it" somewhere and just explain the steps?

I think you try and make it personal instead of describing it as a program you heard about somewhere - I think that would turn me off. Instead, I'd approach it as a challenge (most guys like challenges) to see how far you could get with your personal finances in six weeks. Ask him, "What do we have to lose?" and remind him it's only six weeks.

[lucid-sunshine]

We have been talking about it and he is on board we just need to set the paramaters.

Are we allowed to grocery shop or do we stock up first. I also would allow for gas in the cars since I don't think we could go 6 weeks with out filling up.

[Missystuy]

It actually wasn't THAT hard to convince my dh, LOL. He was actually excited that was I willing to try this and get it to work. He was pretty good about staying onboard and giving me his reciepts. I was the one who fell off the wagon big time about June-ish.

[tabby25]

I talked to my dh and he is all about it. He is wanting to get everything paid off this year. He thinks he might be getting laid off in 2009. His work makes parts for Ford and they are slowing down alot.

[jvryden]

Talking to my DH about it last year was the best thing I could possibly do. I have always avoided money talks, but we were finally able to just talk about it all and do the challenge together. It was bonding! I just threw the idea out there and he was totally on board. We made tons of financial progress last year and I hope to do even better this next year.