1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
>2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor....
>3. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have
>monkeys and apes?
>4. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all
>the bad girls live.
>5. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
>6. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself,
>is it considered a hostage situation?
>7. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
>8. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
>9. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to
>remain silent?
>10. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?
>11. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
>12. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
>13. How is it possible to have a civil war?
>14. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
>15. Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have "S" in it?
>16. Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"?
>17. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

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