My dh will be graduating from college with a business degree this may. Next year, he will be taking two classes at the college so that the following year he may begin going to the seminary to become a minister. I'm feeling a bit alone lately because none of my family understand why we are taking this route, and I don't really have any close freinds at this time. I'm interested in finding others who know the challenges seminary wives and ministers wives face. I know that with at least members of my family, it seems society expects more from us and our children, that we are suppose to be somehow more perfect or less fallible. I know that at least at my church, theoretically thats not true, and everyone is suppose to believe that the minister and his family is just as human as the next person and shouldn't be judged any harder than anyone else in the church. I don't care what religion or denomination you are, because I think the social aspects we deal with are about the same, I just was hoping to get a support type thing going on for those of us in the same boat.

yes.....the best thing to keep in mind is that your human and you will make mistakes and yes everybody will be watching how you live.....I dont pay any attention to what people think about how we live our life...you will never please everybody...and people will get upset with messageS that has be preached ....I too am a preacher also ....but my inlaws are all in church so it makes it alot easier......just do what God has for you to do and only worry about the things that God wants you to do...and always remember....GOD Is ALWAYS RIGHT THERE....

__________________
CHOOSE TODAY WHOM YOU WILL SERVE!!!

Well, I'm not married to one (although DH does preach to me LOL) but my dad is a preacher. I can tell you that growing up a PK was tough at times. You tell someone your dad is a preacher and they either say "oh, those are the worst ones" or they think you'll be a high and mighty snob. I felt judged a lot. I also felt I couldn't do anything wrong that my dad would find out or the congregation. God blessed me with a really good friend who I hung out with a lot in high school... and she's still my very best friend. She understood me and we tended to keep eachother on the right track as much as possible.

Now, being an adult (and my dad is still my preacher) things are a bit different. I don't feel like I'm being judged but I do feel like I need to be a good example to the other moms and women of our congregation - kinda like they are judging my dad on how he raised me... if that makes any sense?!

I think that wherever God guides you, you'll find someone to connect with. Good luck!

Yup, I am! I think the most important thing to do is to guard your private and family time. There will *always* be needs and people who want you or your husband's time and attention, but your marriage and family must come first! Have good boundaries

Good advise!!! I've seen a few pastoral marriages fall apart. Why??? Because the pastors put the church before their families. This should never happen. God yes....the church family....NO!

__________________
Jodie....Wife to Andrew (1995)
Mommy to Riley (2000) and Wyatt (2003)

That is what my father-in-law did...put his job before his family, and his kids really rebeled. And yes....it did reflect on him...he's leading a flock but couldn't control his own. As long as the priorities are kept in perspective, I think that it can be the best thing that happens to a family.

__________________

I absolutely, 100% agree with this advice! I have found this to be very, very life-giving.

First of all, you have gorgeous family Doula-Mom


I also agree my father in law is a pastor and HE has no one to talk to becuase he is always worried about everyone else. My MIL is a strong woman and sticks by him. But his relationship with his family has been put on the back burner big time

My advice is the same...make time for your family's relationship to God first!!!

__________________

Thanks! :love:

my bil is a minister he and his wife live in our guest cottage my Dh has been to seminary he preaches alot now we decided along tme ago that we would follow what God tells our family and we would not worry about other people .....
it been hard on my kids but I am proud to say my Sons are remarkable men my oldest is taking class he heads our chirldrens church and my other two older boys are very active in the church.