Ok, My DH was raised Born again. He accepted christ as his savior at a young age and claimed it while we were dating. We never went to church together and I was ok with that cause we said we woulld raise our children in a church. Well fast forward eight years and one child and we are not going to church. He will not go with us so it is hard to get up and go. I am so frustrated and sad about all this! It is so horrifying!
his Mom is very big into church, and has been really into it for about 4 years now. Well, Tonight He was talking to Her and telling Her about all our trouble this week and She says that He needs to go to church. Well He does not like being told what to do and gets all mad. WEll then She tells Him that the most important thing in His life needs to be getting right with God and He goes off saying that it is inly if you are a christian. Well oh brother that did not go over well, obviously. So He goes on about muslims and all sorts of other religeons and i think She thinks he is gonna become a muslim now! AAAAAH, He isn't. This is what He believes, that there is a god and only one god, but He doesn't know anything else for sure. But He is not exploring those avenues either. Whatever???? He makes me so mad I want to crawl in a hole and cry for a long time.
Why can't He just give into it. I was raised catholic and When we first got together this was not an issue, He wanted to raise a holy family as well. Next week I am taking my Daughter to church and He will ahve to deal with us being all involved in a church. Too bad for Him. I will make friends and get to know the lord even more!
He could teach me so much too! oh my i am so sad. Please pray that God will move into His heart! It is hard dealing with a MIL who is so sad for your husband. (Her older son who lives near us but 19 hours away from MIL is working on becoming Japanese missionaries with His family so that does not help My DH any way as far as hid Mom goes.)
I jsut feel like i have lost control of my dream for a family and He is so much more concerned about money and material things than life and health and what happens when you die! ok now I am crying and need to stop going on and on! Please pray!!! Thank you

I agree that you need to do what you think is right. So if you want to go to church and want your children in church then just take them without him. Yes, it may be hard, but if it matters so much to you then you should do it anyway. Maybe he'll change his mind if he sees you all going. Or maybe he'll meet some of the people and decide he wants to go. But for now just do what you want for yourself and your children.

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I agree with aliadam You need to do what you think is best for you and your children. He agreed to it when you were first together, so he can't say that he didn't know that was the plan. I really hope things get better, and I will pray for your situation!

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You do what you know God wants you to do...go to church and bring your child...and all you can do for him is to pray and leave the option open of him going with you. Maybe over time, with your child getting involved, there will be special programs here and there, etc. that he will want to go see, and this will draw him in. In our church, these type of programs are called, "outreach" because that is exactly what they do...they bring in those who are sometimes reluctant.... I will also keep him and you both in my prayers. It is so nice to have this part of the board...to know there are other Christian mommies out there.

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I'd go anyway but I am in kinda the same situation and doubt dh would go with me. Ijust keep thinking that sometimes we don't lead others, sometimes we reflect and they see something beautiful in the reflection. I think it may have to be this way for us again. He didn't believe in God when we met but now he does so in some way at least that change has occurred. My reflection isn't a clear as it used to be though and I would really like to change that.

Take your children and go to church. Believe me - the more you push him, the more you try to swing him your way, the more you tell him how much he is upsetting you - the more you will push him away from church. Everyone finds their own path, and his path is not the same as yours right now. It does not mean that it will not change later on, but you have to be prepared that it might not change. Some non-believers become believers. And some believers become non-believers. How we are at one point in our lives is not necessarily who we will be forever.

It sounds to me that, right now, he is a deist. He believes in God, but that is all. No particular religious doctrine. That like our founding fathers. You mention "why can't he just give in to it?" That is asking him to live a lie. You can't pretend faith. TRUST ME ON THIS. As one being forced to attend church for YEARS, just sitting there warming a spot on a pew, it does nothing. His mom sounds like a worrywort, tho, if he can just mention Islamic beliefs & she's freaking out thinking he's going to become a muslim.

My grandmother took her kids to church - my grandfather did not. My mom took us kids to church - my father did not. It's not the least bit uncommon.

Here is a website that discusses all levels of belief--there are Christians, agnostics & athiests on this board. He might read something that helps him define his level of belief.
http://freethought-fellowship.org/cms/index.php

Follow where God is leading you to go and take your child. He may or may not go, but you have to do what is right for you and your child. It will be hard, but the rewards that you will gain later are much more important that rewards now. Your child will be grounded and that is worth more than gold. You might be surprised at his response when you start getting up and going. I will pray that he will see that he needs to be the leader of the home, and will step it up for his wife and child.

I agree ,take yourself and your DD to church- DH has to make the decision himself.

My first marriage was to an adult male who forbid me to go to church with my friends because I might become a 'BibleThumper', and I complied. It was a control issue not a religious difference. I let him have that power and I was wrong.

You may not know all your DH is dealing with his thoughts/feelings on religion. I think he may be struggling on his own Faith Journey but he has to find his way- You can't do it for him. If his mother was pushy about it when he was growing up he may be dealing with that 'worry'.
You can hold the candle and light a path for him to follow but do not push him. Walk along side him and hold his hand but do not pull him forcibly into church.

Once DH sees your comfort - then maybe he will follow same path.

Although my children were raised Catholic, I also encouraged them to experience other faiths and to ask questions- So when Confirmation comes around the child has choice to get confirmed Catholic or to choose to practice their faith in a Church of their choice.

I'll force feed my kids broccoli, but never Religion.

I sounds like religion was forced upon him, causing him to rebel. I agree with the others. Let him be, you can't force him without hard feelings, and you can't be responsible for him; he's an adult. And, yes, take the kids and go on your own. Hopefully, it's a phase. My husband is the same way. I just get upset, though, because he discusses it in front of and with my son, which to me is a no-no. Maybe when ds is older, but not at this early age (he's six). He already asks so many great questions, but at this point, believes me. The other day he asked if spirits have hands. He then said they must, since God had to have hands to make us. Then he said that he use to think the song said, "He's got the whole world in his pants" and thought God must have really big pants. Now he knows God has big hands. Giggle.

Merry Meet All,
I would tell you to follow you own spiritual need, if you have the need to go to church, then I say go, take your children. As for your Husband, it seems to me that he is still trying to find his path, and is questioning what he has been brought up to believe.
He will find his dirrection, for right now, he is exactially where he needs to be, as are we all.
Brightest Blessings to ALL.

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