We have one cousin-in-law and she went to the mall with me and refused to go into Sears! she hated the store and wouldnt go in with me, well I left her outside and told her I would be back in 1 hour!
I needed to get comferters once and I was telling her i have to get one from a store it was $100 down from $200, she was like, no!, dont get that, get the ones $200 down from $400!!! if I could afford that I would, but I cant, so I am looking at the cheaper ones!
She always goes for the best quality and just spent about $1000 dressing up 4 windowsin her house!
I dont hate her for it, she can afford it, her DH owns a business and she works, so they are not charging it or anything, they pay cash. But I dont tlel her abo9ut sales or anything, since she doesnt care.

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We buy things we dont need,
with money we dont have,
in order to impress people
we dont like?
(Ramsey, D)

I stopped sharing some of my frugal ways, because I get the response of "Oh it must be nice to have time to do that" or" If I were a SAHM I could do that as well but some of us have to work" Hello thats one of the reason I can be a SAHM even though I do daycare! However my brother and sil since having their baby are calling me all the time about how to do diy stuff like hm mixes, they want to make their own babyfood like I did. So I am starting to open up with them more. She loved the tip about using only a tsp of laundry soap with the highly concentrated!

I don't have any really frugal friend either. They all tell me about how broke they are but I am the only one of us shopping in thrift stores or clearance rack for clothes and shoes and housewares. I even have one friend who tells me that she goes to the mall when she gets bored at least 2-3 times a week but she is having problems paying her mortgage. Just the other day she told me that she has planned yet another vacation. Go figure

This thought occurs to me all the time - with both friends and family. What's crazy is that people say that they admire how I'm frugal and want to try to live that way, but then buy only name-brand clothes for their teens, don't ever use coupons or shop grocery store sales, spend $15 for lunch - you guys know how it is!! I just want to tell them - "Stop saying you wish you could learn from me and do this, because you're just not willing to make the sacrifices I make in order to save money!!!" It's exhausting and frustrating!

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Tabatha, mom to
Isaac, 8
Mallory, 6
Elena, 2

I know that I am not the most frugal person, I do like to shop but not to the extent most of my friends do. There are others around who don't spend a lot but it is out of necessity but then again when they do have money they blow it on something.

A guy my dh works with has 2 kids and another on the way so with their work schedule (or lack there of) money is sometimes tight. But then when they are getting a steady income they spend it on stupid things like $180 on tickets to a stupid show for them and a bunch of friends. Then they didn't even end up going. She said she was trying to be nice and wasn't going to "make" anyone pay them back. Thats not nice, thats stupid when the week before you were worrying about having enough to pay your bills.

So when I say I don't really want to go spend a lot people assume its because we don't have the money. But thats usually not it. I would just rather spend my money on something else. We don't deny ourselves the things we want to do we just try to avoid spending money on stupid things and be frugal in other areas so we can enjoy the things we want to.

My in-laws are the worst people in terms of handling money. DH was included in that until recently. They never save money, don't even have a savings account. My SIL won't work b/c she can't find the job she "wants" although they are living with her sister b/c since she doesn't work she has no money to support herself and her 3 kids. I told her McDonalds was hiring. Its better than nothing. DH and I have helped her out some b/c of some extra money we got from the army but all of that along with dh's previous ways put us in a bad way we are just now recovering from so as much as I want to help them for the girls sake, no more. Since I am being frugal and saving money everyone expects that money to go to help them. So now no one knows how much money we are saving--Starting now. Even dh doesn't know the extent of how much it is b/c even though he knows we are about to buy a house he still feels guilty. We've paid their $100 cable bill more than once...which irritates the crap out of me especially since thats not even a bill we pay at our house!

Are you sure we aren't related? That sounds exactly like my mil. Geez.

I am so glad I discovered this forum!
The only other adult in my neighborhood during the day is also a SAHM, but she's not frugal, she's "cheap." We share a desire to save money, but our motivations are different.
Most of the other women in my circles either make lots of money and enjoy spending it or want everything to think they make lots of money so they spend what they don't have.

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~Jeweled

DH and I don't really have a lot of friends to compare to, but the ones that we do have don't quite get it either. I think our only saving grace from the you're crazy looks is that we're saving for our first house. However, once we do get our house it's not going to change anything. People tend to respond better if the saving is for a certain goal.

My SIL became a SAHM about a year ago and she's actually become less frugual, which just boggles my mind. She doesn't do things to save money because she doesn't have time. I'm not saying that SAHMs have more time than anyone else, but it just sounds weird to me.

I, also, agree.

I do not have one friend that likes being frugal. No one does OAMC, no one shops Thrift Shops, etc. They think we are wealthy because we have a nice house, car is paid for, etc. Most of our furniture is 2nd hand that we have refinished, re-upholstered, etc. and some are beautiful antiques. Our children wear name brand clothes (of course bought at
2nd hand stores), etc. My niece has all her boys hair cut at a beautician at 18$ a cut (she has 4 counting her dh) and I cut all 4 of my guys...in fact, the twins have never had a barber cut. Can you imagine how much I am saving in just one month?!! I do go to Pro-Cuts for my hair cuts but only with a coupon (they come out every month) so with tip it costs me $10.

We even took our boys to Cancun last summer on vacation....go to Funjet.com and watch for flights that need to be filled and you will get big discounts. All 5 of us went for 2500$ (all inclusive) for 7days/6 nights. Now mind you, we won't do that every summer but I am not throwing away the thought of every 3 summer doing something big. Once we went to Disney World for 2000$ for 6 of us and that included a condo.

Sorry to rattle but I just feel so alone in the real world.n my soapbox:
Debby

We are frugal because we want to. We do not have a lot of friends who are like us but a few are coming our way. I now have people ask me about coupons, OAMC (freezer cooking), good ways to use up leftovers, household hints to save money. I do not have a housekeeper or a nanny or a cook ..... my kiddos will learn to clean and cook. I get so angry when my in-laws make bad decisions with their money and then ask us for help .... one year they made more than us and still wanted help. I clip coupons, shop sales and all the other stuff to help my family not my in-laws ... and then they are pissed at us because we won't help. I am so glad that I am not the only one with in-laws and money problems.