Ok, so I am really embarrassed to be telling everyone this but if I dont talk to someone besides my husband, I'm sure I will go crazy!!! This would be a LONG story, but to cut it short, I am an RN and a few years ago I had my 2nd child and decided to stay home for a while with him. (I didnt get to do that with my 1st) I took off 8 months and it was the best time of my life. Then money started to get tight so I went back to work, but I had to find a new job, because my old position had been filled. Unfortuneatly and fortuneatly I guess, I changed jobs 3 times just trying to find the "right one". I think I was spoiled from being home and honestly just didnt want to be there. So anyway I am working and the job is ok, but doesnt pay great and because I had taken time off and still lived like I was working, needless to say our cc balances are ugly, and now we are skimming by and to add to the mix, I have since had another baby. Last one. I have listened to Dave Ramsey and he makes such good sense, but when you are already behind, where do you start?? I feel totally responsible for getting us into this mess and my husband has been wonderful. He works full time and is a volunteer fireman also. And he still offers to get another job, but I dont think its physically possible plus again, its my fault not his. So anyway, if anyone has been in a similar situation, I am up for comments, advice, support or whatever you can give. Thanks.

I lurk on the DAve RAmsey Living like no one else message board, there's some good advice there. And The Fly Lady (I think it is Flylady.net) has a great mantra about babysteps, her theory is that you did not get messy/overweight/in debt overnight and you won't get out of it overnight, you need to take babysteps.

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Amanda
Mommy to Zack & Emily

it's like anything else...don't look at the big picture too long or it feels overwhelming....pick a direction and start..groceries-how can you cut/save money there...then look at bills-where and can you cut back on any there?Dont think "where do I start" just start....it'll snowball into a Good thing from there...

Hang tough...you can do it

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Avoid Fruits~N~Nuts....you are what you eat!!!

well, are you in the hole because you just dont have the money coming in to keep up for basics, or are you in the hole because of needless wasteful spending? thats a big difference.

if its the latter, then i really urge you to do CASH ONLY starting first thing in the morning and stop spending. then pay down debt, choose just small debt to focus on paying off, then do it and take it in littles.

the only way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time.

good luck, read dave ramsey and GO TO CASH!

The first priority is to get caught up on bills if you are way behind. Basic needs come first- rent or house payment, utilties, food, etc then once you're caught up on those, get caught up on your credit card payments. This could take you awhile- it won't happen by next paycheck. The whole process should hurt because if it hurts, you're less likely to repeat your mistakes in the future. At this point you don't worry about the debt or the savings. Try to make the minimums on your credit cards while you get caught up on the rest.

THEN start your EF, once you've reached your thousand dollars, you begin the debt snowball. Don't be tempted to start the debt snowball first- there's a reason he says to get the EF established first.

Find anything and everything to cut out of the budget- this part is hard for a lot of people, myself included but it has to be done. Some people opt to get rid of cable, others just take the extras off their phone lines. There are really only two options if your bills exceed your income- either cut down the bills or bring in more income.

Be very careful about what you spend until you're caught up. Slash the grocery budget as humanely as possible, don't buy clothing unless you absolutely are in dire need, squeeze every last bit out of the toothpaste tube.

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Devin

David 6, Alexis 2

i have been there first pay your basics rent/mortgage food utlities loans then move on to cc thats what i did. i also made sure i called all my cards they were all willing to reduce my rates and get me on a payment plan. i did have to let alot of medical go to collection(used my tax return and paid all those off now) but now my credit score is rising we are in a better place and everyones getting paid and we have a small emergency fund going. so it can be done you just have to take a hard look and make some serious choices. and call your creditors the longer you wait the less likely they are to help you. good luck i'm living proof from the edge of bk to paying bills on time and not incurring new ones....

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'The will of God will never take you where the
Grace of God will not protect you.'

HAVE A BOOTIFUL HALLOWEEN

Brensmom: When the cc companies agreed to lower your interest rate and set you up on a payment plan, how did it look on your credit record? And was it on the condition that you not use the cards further?

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I agree with what has been said above. I have also been in a similar situation. What worked for us was that we did what was suggested. We paid all of our basics first. Then we started paying the cards with the smallest amount charged. We have since paid off a few cards completely. While doing this we stopped using credit cards ENTIRELY. I only use cash--even got rid of my debit card! It has been a huge success.

My first thought is that 'working more' is usually a guy's first answer. I'm think with three kids, hubby having a fulltime job and having an intensive volunteer job, seeing LESS of him is probably NOT what you had in mind.

Instead, I'd ask hubby to quit his volunteer job so he can stay home with the kids while you work VERY parttime as a nurse. I have several medical professionals in my family and I know most nurses make more working parttime than they do working fulltime. You might consider just being an on-call nurse. That way you can work only when your schedule allows.

Everything else mentioned above applies - make sure you stop the bleeding, ie: stop using your credit cards. Cover your basic bills. Make sure you're saving something. An emergency fund is the first place to start. Unexpected expenses WILL come up and unless you have an emergency fund you'll be tempted to use the credit cards again. After that, pay down the debt - slowly.

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"I've been rich and I've been poor but independently wealthy is where it is at."

only one card made us close it once i made 6 payments on the plan they changed my status on my credit report to closed per my request after they did that my score did jump a little. the others allowed me to be shown as open(i requested they lower my limits as well) so now every 3 months i call and lower my limit a few hundred dollar once they get down to only 500 available i will just leave them. i have cut up all cards and we only use our debit card or cash now.(we don't do alot of spending like we used to). i must say i had all of my cards for over 6 years and never was late or missed a payment i called them as soon as i saw that i was gonna have a problem wich i think helped me my highest interest rate now is 4%. i was pro active i knew i was not gonna be able to pay the amounts due with the interest rates i had so just shaving the interest rates down and moving some payment dates made a huge dent in the total debt we had. the worst thing they can do is say no. and if they do i recommend sending something and calling back the next month at least you will have shown that you are making an effort.

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'The will of God will never take you where the
Grace of God will not protect you.'

HAVE A BOOTIFUL HALLOWEEN