Here's the question.... My cousin's wedding is in a few weeks and I've been contimplating how much money we should give as a gift. There is no way that I would buy them something b/c I have no clue where they're registared or anything that they would need or want. I was suprised to see that my children were invited too. What I was always taught by my parents was that you give enough to pay for your meal and add a little extra for the gift. Our money is pretty tight and the wedding is 2 hrs away. We are going to attend b/c if we don't we'll never going to hear the end of it. So here is where the dilema lies, my cousin's family for our wedding didn't even give close to cover the cost of the meal. B/c money is tight do we skimp on the gift too? I hate doing that but like I said money is tight and gas is expensive. What I was thinking was giving enough to just cover the meal, which I estamate is $25 ( I used to work at the place they are having the reception). Is that too little?

I hate going to weddings but when it cannot be avoided I usually give $50... I thought that was acceptable and within my means. I never thought to consider the cost of the meal...that is a good idea I suppose.

Why don't you buy them a really pretty frame or photo album. All newleyweds need/want that. That way you got something for them and you don't have to spend $100 doing it. That's one thing I can still use. LOL

I have always heard that you should cover the cost of the meal. But if money is tight you should do what is in your budget. And don't feel bad about doing that.

But don't skimp just because they did. Two wrongs don't make a right. JMO

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Stacey

The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us, and from motives of policy are silent when we should speak, the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls. ~ Elizabeth Cady Stanton

I know what "they" say about gift giving covering the cost of your meal. While that is a good guideline, there are times that guests just can't afford to cover the cost of their meal- be it $15 or $100. Especially when many times the guests pay for new clothing, bridal shower gifts, airline tickets, hotels, etc. I think you should take into consideration your budget, the cost of attending the wedding, as well as how well you know and like your cousin. Then give what you think you can manage and are comfortable giving.
Write a sweet card and let them know how happy you are for them and that should be great. Then, if you take pics at the wedding, send them copies - those were the best ones I got from our wedding and I loved that my freinds and family cared enough to take pics and mail them to me

HTH!!

I would find out where they are registered. I am sure someone in the family will know. This way you dont have to spend a set amount, and can get something you know they want. The last wedding I went to I bought a set of alcohol glasses (beer mugs, shot glasses, etc...) that dh's friends had registered for. It cost me thirty dollars and that was sufficient I thought. They were just friends, and not close ones. If it had been my brother someone close I would have probably gotten a gift equal to $100 or given cash.

I like the idea of a frame or album also, because theyre going to have tons of pics after the wedding, and will appreciate it I am sure.

Check THINGS REMEMBERED in your locAL MALL THEY JUST HAD SOME WEDDING STUFF CLEARANCED

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You should never feel pressured to spend a certain amount on any gift. Do what's in your budget. Write a nice card, or show a nice sentiment in another way if possible. That said, you should never also skimp just because they did - two wrongs don't make a right.

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Thats just what I was thinking.


I never heard of the cost of the meal thing. The way I see it is if they want me to pay for my meal then Why did they invite me? I dont have a party and then charge my guests.
I havent been to many weddings so this hasnt been a big problem but I would just give a nice frame. Check out things remembered. I gave a friend a silver capsil that you put your married certificate in and it was ingraved. Total cost was less than 25$ and I know they liked it becuase I got a very toughtful thankyou.

Couldn't agree more... I find that crass to be honest. Either find a nice gift you can afford, or just give what you can truly afford. Don't base your gift on what you received from them.

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~@~ Carla ~@~