Yesterday I saw a Lexis at Aldi's, go figure.

Unless he is bringing in 6 digit figure they probably are in debt.

Do you ever compare your childhood to your dh to see who was poorer. Dh says I was rich cuz we had cable. I say he was rich because he had designer clothes (mil was a manager at a department store and got a discount). Growing up I had Coleco--the poor man's Atari and a knock off Cabbage Patch doll. I wouldn't trade my childhood for the world. At least I knew my parents loved each other and us.

Oh geez...give me a break. I hate to think that I might the 'jones' to some folks. Are people so trivial that they make assumptions on things like how big your house is, what kind of car you drive? Is someone automatically unhappy because they have nice things? Unless they have a certain income (which you're not privy to anyhow) they're in debt? Good grief. Nobody knows what's going on in anybody's economic background. If it makes you feel better to think that they're unhappy or in debt - fine I guess! I'm guessing that they're not the people that really are unhappy though!

Okay, off my soapbox now. I think it's a bit much to assume all these things about someone just because they have a nice house. Just like it would be offensive for them to think nasty things about 'you' (general you) because you don't have certain things. It's a bit of a double standard IMO.

Nobody should be ashamed with what they have or what they don't have...it's a shame that it seems to make such a difference.

Don't feel bad, personally I wouldn't want a tv in every room. We have a large house, but only 2 tv's and we only use the one in the family room.

Oh, my ds has his own bathroom too, it is one of those jack & jill types where two bedrooms can use it. That is actually the trend now, I don't see that one as a big deal or a 'Jones' thing. Also, remember, a lot of people Do make a lot of money and if they can afford things, why not? We are all different, some people are on public assistance, and some people just have really well paying jobs. Way back when I just assumed every one lives the way we do - just middle of the road. But they don't. We are all different, with different comfort levels, different bank accounts and different income levels.

I'm sure that EVERYONE is the Joneses to someone. We all need to be happy with ourselves (inside & out) and not judge each other. JMHO

[quote=deemom]Yesterday I saw a Lexis at Aldi's, go figure.

OK, Whoa here!! I'm trying hard not to get defensive, but I don't see your connection here. Are you saying people who drive nice cars shouldn't shop at discount places? Or are you saying people with nice cars are automatically in debt and Need to shop at discount places?

At our Aldi's I also see my share of Lexus's, Mercedes, along with the Honda minivans (mine ). If you know any "old money" people then you know that most likely these people did not just get handed their money, they earned it, and they earned it by finding good deals. You just shouldn't assume people that like to find a deal must be in debt! I'm sorry, I resent this! This is just way too presumptive. It can be flip flopped too then ~ if people are struggling financially then they have no business shopping at nice places? Of course not, that would be absurd. Sometimes you get what you pay for, and if buying an expensive coat, for instance, is going to save you money in the long run, then you are saving money, not just throwing it away.

Again, I don't know in what spirit this comment was written, so I'm trying hard not to get defensive. Please explain.

Amen Sister.

I am sorry, Oregano--you are absolutely right! I shouldn't have assumed that just because they are well off that they are unhappy. Sorry again--

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I really hope I will not come off as a Jones. We are finishing our house this summer. DH starting building it 2 years ago with the help of his dad, my stepdad, my nephew, DH's cousin, and I have even helped a little (okay, I painted and cleaned up after them but I was still helping). It is pretty big-but is being paid for as we go. We have lived in an old single wide trailer that is paid for for several years, I paid off the propetry the house is on before DH and I were even married. We have some cc debt, but are by no stretch of the imagination overwhelemd by it. My car is paid for (it is a 2005 minivan) his truck is not-it too is new. We have tried to make good decisions, and not lived beyond our means.
By the end of this summer I hope to be able to stay at home with our two kids. We will have paid of our cc cards at that point, live in a house that is paid for and only have to pay DH's truck payment, taxes, utilities , groceries, that kid of thing. We have always gone on vacations with the kids- not real elaboarte but fun-
We are very happy, I hope just becasue we are going to have a nice house-and fairly new cars people don't ASSUME we are unhappy and in debt up to our ears.
Wow that is longer than I had planned- but do we shop at Aldi-yep- thrift/consignment stores-yep, use the Angel FB-yep, eat at home vs going out-yep. Adjustments like that make it possible to have the "nicer" things we want.
Okay I am done.

I totally agree with you Oregano. I didn't want to be the first to stir the pot so I kept my mouth shut. I'm sure when my girls go to school they will be considered the Jones' They each have their own bathroom and walkin closet, but hey that's the way our house is set up. I'm not complaining about how my parent's built it 25 yrs ago. Yes we go on at least one vacation a year, but we have a timeshare. Alot cheaper then paying everything out of pocket each time we go. Yes we spend extravagantly on SOME things, but I also cut costs in other places. Quality comes first when I'm looking for something nice, ie TV, computer, camera, etc. I shop at Aldi's, I go to consignment shops and buy gently used clothes for my girls. I shop the clearance racks. etc, etc, etc.

I don't think it's fair to judge people that way, you can't say she is a career driven woman who works all the time to have the things she has. She is a SAHM. You also don't know if they are in debt up to their eyeballs unless you ask them personally. Some people enjoy nice things and ARE happy.

Ok I'm stepping down now!

Sounds like you are going about things the "right" way. I certainly wish that we had been so smart when we were starting out and not have racked up what debt we did. To build a house and be debt free (or mostly debt free) is wonderful. Good for you.

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