I love my children dearly and know that being a SAHM is what God wants me to do. However, I found that I felt like I lost part of myself being a SAHM. I needed something that gave me purpose outside of my home. It does not lift my self esteem to clean a bathroom well. I needed something outside of our home - I found that in my home business and doing a couple of other things. For some women this isn't necessary, for me it was crucial.

Staying at home is wonderful and I wouldn't trade it for the world. Couple pieces of advice from me.

1. Consider this your new job. At time's it's challenging but basically for 8-10 hours a day I am "working". This involves child care, house management, finances etc....anything necessary to make stay at home a reality.

2. Never stop looking for new ways to save money. Just when you think you have cut the budget as far as you can, look again. Be careful though not to get into a mode where you think you are being deprived, but make very sure that what you are spending your money on is necessary and within budget.

3. Consider staying at home the biggest gift you'll ever receive (besides your family of course). For years woman worked to get equality and be able to have successful careers. Thanks to them we have that option. However we seem to have molded ourselves to thinking we need to have the second income in order to survive. We don't. It's all a matter of priorities. If you are able to choose to stay home, and maintain a good attitude, the daily gifts from your children will far surpass anything that money can buy.

All this being said, you also need the support of a loving DH to make this work. I'm so thankful for mine and I tell him every day.

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Children Learn What They Live, And Live What They Learn.
What have you taught your child today?
When life throws you a curve ball...it's up to you how you catch it!

Thank you all for your advice. I am planning on turning in my notice in a matter of 3 weeks from now. It is all that I think about at work these days and yet I'm scared at how my life/identity/self worth will change. You have all given me several things to think about and try.

I am SO glad this post was started! This is exactly where I am right now. I am a teacher now, but am not returning next school year to stay home with my one year old and to have more babies (God Willing!!) I am keeping a couple kids in our home to continue making some money. It will still cut my paycheck in half and currently I contribute to our finances even with my husband. Remember that I am teacher so that should tell you that we are not wealthy people! So many people have said to me that to stay home I will just have to quit getting my nails done and do without luxaries. I'm thinking,'yeah right!Like I get my nails done!' I help pay the power bill and we can't cut that out! That being said I have tried cutting everything down that I can think of (besides the extra money we are putting into my husband's car to get it paid off early) and we are still about $500 behind. I am trying out my new income right now and it is tough! Any ideas I may not be thinking of?I could definitly keep more kids and that is probably what will happen, but honestly I love the idea of only having 3 or 4 there (including my own) so they can all get enough attention! What do you guys think?

Also, what does dh stand for! I get that it's your husband, but what is the d?

dear husband

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Mom to dd (age 9) and ds (age 11)
blogging daily about purpose and personal identity

Hahahaha! The 'D' could stand for anything you want!!

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~Missy~Mommy
Meghan9.Samantha7,Cameron5

New England Mommysavers Social Group, Join us!http://mommysavers.com/boards/group.php?groupid=10

I guess the d depends on how your day is going!

First, d is dear or darling.

Second, as a part time SAHM (I work 2 days/week down from fulltime) here are my challenges.

My dh gets an hourly rate plus commission that varies. That being said, this month we are not affording our bills. So be careful! I am having a yardsale for gas and food money and he is selling his 4 wheeler to pay electric. He had a car accident also and I am cashing in my 401k to pay the deductible and catch up some bills. We had a $350 unexpected vet bill as well! When it rains it pours for us!

I like working 2 days/week, it gets me out of the house and gives me some adult time. I don't make much b/c I pay $101/week for daycare for 2 kids, but it's better than nothing.

I should have taken the advice and opened up my own bank account for just my stay at home money that I made from babysitting or yard sales or surveys or whatever. I can see it my dh eyes sometimes that he regrets letting me stay home b/c of our money stress.
I've been home a little over 1 yr. now. My oldest dd is going to kindergarten in Sept. so I am not sure if that helps or not as I won't have to pay for her childcare, but I don't know if I can work around her kindergarten schedule.

You are great already having a babysitting job lined up. I've been trying to get one since Dec. and am wasting money advertising. I actually did just finally get an email from my craigslist ad so I am hoping that works out.

I also find I don't get as much done around the house as I'd like to ( or my dh would like me to). We've been trying to paint the inside and I just can't get it cleaned up and the stuff off the walls to do it.

I think the most important is to save money beforehand for emergencies like I mentioned we are having right now. My dh has to work alot on the side which takes time away from us and makes him tired, but he does it. That's part of why I am considering going back to work fulltime. My boss has mentioned me working more hours so I guess it'll all work out eventually.

Oh a way to save some money is to tell your car insurance that your car is not for work anymore, I think that saves a little bit. Also, I am checking out that angel ministries for helping to cut down my food bill. That "bill" has definitely increased alot w/being at home!

Good luck to you! I am glad that I am home w/the kids to care for and nuture them, but it is hard work!!

I am sorry for all of your mishaps lately! You will get through it, somehow it just works out. Good luck! You are doing a wonderful thing being there for your kids and just keep in mind that you have a long time to work, but the kids will only be little for a short time.

Understand that being a sahm is a challenge beyond money. As much as you love your kids and want to be around them soon you will being doing anything to find a moment to yourself. Don't feel bad when you do take that time. That was hard for me. As it stands now because mine are so young its hard for me to even get to go potty by myself.

Also find groups to be around that are sahms. The kids can play and you can socialize. The best ones are free.