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Old 07-09-2008, 01:41 PM   #51
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kalice
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As a sahm you might want to consider babysitting as a supplemental income. The pay is not great but you get to be home with your kids, they have built in friends and you have the freedom to come and go as you please as long as that is your agreement with the childs mom. It's really not that hard to pack up an extra one once you get into a routine
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Old 07-14-2008, 04:01 PM   #52
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JULIEROACH
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Originally Posted by Jared&Maggie'smom View Post
I love my children dearly and know that being a SAHM is what God wants me to do. However, I found that I felt like I lost part of myself being a SAHM. I needed something that gave me purpose outside of my home. It does not lift my self esteem to clean a bathroom well. I needed something outside of our home - I found that in my home business and doing a couple of other things. For some women this isn't necessary, for me it was crucial.
I could not agree more. I completely lost what I thought was value for myself. I realize now that I was depending on what others thought of me as my value. I found my value in God. I set aside a half hour to an hour each night to go read my Bible and do a devotion and pray. My husband is usually gracious about giving me that time...although sometimes he's not as gracious as other times.

Sometimes you also just need adult interaction. Maybe a Bible study group that provides child care. Or even a play-date where you are friends with the other mom. It will do wonders for your self-esteem.
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Old 08-18-2008, 08:34 PM   #53
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Singlemompayingoffdebt
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Since I am a single mom, it is difficult for me to quit my job and stay home. Plus my son is 12, so I get home a little while after he does. And then it is off to sports until 7:30.

Kudos to all moms who have been able to become stay at home moms ! That is wonderful and I am sure extremely fulfilling !
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Old 11-13-2008, 09:33 AM   #54
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erika1026
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I just went through this decision process this past spring. Add up the cost for you (the mommy) to go to work, child care, gas, etc... and than subtract that amount from your paycheck. After child care and gas, I worked 40 hours/week and had a 1.5 hour commute ( due to traffic) each way, I was paying over $1300/month just to go to work . I ended up getting a part time job with the same bank I work for in my hometown. Now I work 3 days a week but one of those days is Saturday so DH is with DD that day and we pay for daycare for 2 days a week. The difference this decision has made for my family has been so positive.
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Old 11-17-2008, 02:18 PM   #55
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We paid off most of the bills and the cars. We pretty much only had our house to pay for. We did lower our insurance, change our phone service and things like that also. With God's help and a great hubby, it has been very successful and we are better off now then when I was working.
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Old 11-17-2008, 04:59 PM   #56
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I knew when I was pregnant with our first 14 yrs ago that I wanted to be a stay at home Mom but also that my DH didn't make enough to cover all the bills. So I checked around at what I could do in my time to make money and started selling Avon. Once I quit I had no daycare expenses, very little clothing needed for me and bought 2nd hand what clothing was needed for the kids.

I am able to work around school activities and when the kids were younger make phone calls, etc. during naps and toss in a load of laundry during our play time together. I wasn't able to quit my job until dd1 was 3 yrs old as I had the insurance and my Avon business wasn't where it needed to be to replace my income.

With my youngest I was at Children's Hospital and Rehab weekly but was still able to schedule my Avon business around the kids and to combine running errands with my deliveries saving me time and gas.

One of the biggest things is to track what you are spending on food & entertainment as for most of us that is our biggest flexable expense.

Have date night at home buy steak on sale and have a baked potatoe and salad and watch a movie from the library or a new release from Red Box for $1. Make sundies at home a gallon of ice cream with a couple of toppings cool whip and cherries can be had for $10 on sale and will give many dishes from it. Change your meals into cheaper meals by making a meal plan from the sale items and stocking up ahead of time.
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Old 11-20-2008, 09:47 AM   #57
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I think this is great advice. Unfortunately my husband and I weren't able to plan ahead. I was in my last sememster of law school when I found out I was pregnant. It was not in our plans! I finished school, but I had no intentions of taking the bar exam because I decided I wanted to stay home. My husband encouraged me to take it just in case, and I'm glad he did.

I stayed home for 15 months, worked for about a year, then quit to stay home with my son. At the time I was pregnant with my second child, but a few weeks after I quit we lost the baby. Then my husband had a stroke, then we found out I was pregnant again. We were living in a small condo, and decided to buy a house for the kids. We bought one that we could afford easily on my husband's salary. Then, about three months after we moved in, my husband found out he was being laid off.

I was able to find a part time job fairly quickly that allowed me to work from home and paid pretty well. That helped a lot. My husband also found a job, which he will start in a few weeks. Everything will work out, but it has been stressful. A few weeks ago I thought I would have to return to work full time after the baby was born, and I was dreading it.

Anyway, my advice would be to maintain all contacts with your former co-workers. If you have a professional license, keep it current. Don't burn any bridges. If life has taught me anything, it's that we never know what lies ahead. When I quit my job, I thought I'd never practice law again. But I have fallen into the perfect job for me, and it wouldn't be possible if I had let my license laspe or not maintained my former contacts.

One of the best money-saving tips we found was to cancel cable. We were paying about $75 per month. When my husband first suggested cutting it from our budget, I was reluctant. We don't watch a lot of t.v., but I find it useful when I'm preparing dinner to have something for my son to watch. Anyway, we subscribed to Netflix, which is less than $20 per month, and we get unlimited movies (up to three at a time). They also have DVD's of TV shows, and they have some things you can watch instantly through the internet. We hooked an old laptop up to the t.v., and there are plenty of instant kid's shows that my son can watch. We are currently working our way through Season 1 of CSI. Some nights we don't turn the t.v. on at all. We sit and talk and just hang out, and it's nice. Although we could afford cable again now that my husband has found a job, we are not in a hurry to turn it back on. We're thinking about putting the extra $55 per month that we are saving toward our mortgage or student loan debt.

There are other ways to save money as well. We have been very frugal on our groceries, and every week I get the sale ads and see what's on sale. If meat is on sale at a good price, I buy a lot and freeze it. When we make big purchases, we go online and shop for the best prices. We also do Google searches for coupons to major retail stores before making big purchases. It's amazing how much money you can save if you are deliberate about your purchases. There are hundreds of other ways to save.
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Old 11-24-2008, 07:59 AM   #58
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I just wanted to say thank you to all you who have gone before us and are willing to share what you have learned. My husband and I are working to pay off all our debt and with in the next year I will hopefully be staying home. I work as a nanny now. Which is great because DD gets to come with me. But we live around work and it is not working out that great for DD. Again thanks for sharing what you have learned.

Mary
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Old 12-01-2008, 10:02 AM   #59
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grapeape
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Some of you have said you do not want to stay at home and I think that is fine. It is whatever makes you happy. I have family members who say they could never stay at home because they love their jobs and being out in the world. That is great for them. I however do not feel the same. I feel like my purpose in life is to be a mother. I just feel like this is the plan God wants for me. He has always provided for us. It hasn't always been easy but he has always provided what we need. I think if someone really wants to be at home they will figure it out. I have had to work a few times over the years but I always come back to this as soon as I can. I would love a new wardrobe but I know I can't have that and stay at home. It is a choice I make every day. My family has to do without things for me to stay at home. Now I have clip coupons, watch out for sales, garage sale, plan thrifty fun, cook homemade meals. If you ask any of my children they would tell you they much rather I stay at home. Sure they would love to wear they latest fashions and have expensive toys but they would rather have me and that makes me the luckiest girl in the world. I respect anyone who wants to stay at home or go to work. Being a mom is a wonderful job!
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Old 12-01-2008, 10:46 AM   #60
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grapeape View Post
Some of you have said you do not want to stay at home and I think that is fine. It is whatever makes you happy. I have family members who say they could never stay at home because they love their jobs and being out in the world. That is great for them. I however do not feel the same. I feel like my purpose in life is to be a mother. I just feel like this is the plan God wants for me. He has always provided for us. It hasn't always been easy but he has always provided what we need. I think if someone really wants to be at home they will figure it out. I have had to work a few times over the years but I always come back to this as soon as I can. I would love a new wardrobe but I know I can't have that and stay at home. It is a choice I make every day. My family has to do without things for me to stay at home. Now I have clip coupons, watch out for sales, garage sale, plan thrifty fun, cook homemade meals. If you ask any of my children they would tell you they much rather I stay at home. Sure they would love to wear they latest fashions and have expensive toys but they would rather have me and that makes me the luckiest girl in the world. I respect anyone who wants to stay at home or go to work. Being a mom is a wonderful job!
well said!! Being any kind of mommy is great!! I agree with you totally. God has always provided for us too. I love being at home with my kids!
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