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Old 05-10-2007, 07:53 AM   #1
Question Money and Kids - Equal or not?
KathrynHannah
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We know two couples. One are the Even Stevens spending equal amounts on all their kids. If one needs new shorts they all get new shorts..

The other family spends much more on one at one time when they have a need and much less later when another one has a need.

How important is it to try and keep spending equal between kids?
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:06 AM   #2
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I used to do that when they were younger, not because I wanted it even really...just because they weren't really particular about what they wanted to wear and they both needed something. Now, they definately have particular tastes. I'm not going to buy my older son three polo shirts, just because I bought three for my younger son when I know they're going to sit in a drawer unused...kwim?
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:09 AM   #3
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It does not work to try to keep things equal! Especially if you have a wide variety of ages in your kids. What my 13 yr old wants for Christmas definitely costs more than what my 4 yr old wants!!! My 7 yr old may not need new shorts because he has lots of hand me downs from my two other boys, but my 9 yr old might! I just buy what is needed at the time. Each kid knows that they will have their moment!
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:11 AM   #4
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We have never worried about the bottom line, so to speak, of what we spent on each child. We have only been concerned about whether we have provided equally for each of them (as much as is possible). I don't say I am going to spend X amount of money on each child for clothes and spend until it's gone. I evaluate what each child needs and provide for his/her needs. Also, each child is an individual and will have different interests. So, one child's interests may be more expensive that another's. But, what we ask ourselves is "Do we provide opportunities and experiences and provide for the needs of each child equally?" It's also important that the children don't perceive one child is receiving more than another.

It's hard to put this all into words, but I think you can understand what I'm trying to convey here: we don't keep a running tally!
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:16 AM   #5
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ty&nessie'smom
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I buy, as they need. If one doesn't need and the other does it is a waste to buy for both.

I don't like the message that buying for everyone sends to my kids. I don't want them to become conditioned to think that just because he got something I should get something. I think that is perpetuating the philosophy of "Keeping Up with the Jones". If Sally gets a new car it doesn't mean I need one. JMO.
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:24 AM   #6
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Kellyandgirls
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If it Christmas I make sure there is an even amount of money within a dollar or 2!!
but on the average No I dont have it even all the time!! 7 yr old dd need sthings cause she outgrows them!! dd5 gets hand me downs and yes she does get something now and then!! and then she needs shoes sometimes as her feet are not too far behind!! etc!! so It just dpends!! if they are gettin a candy bar then yes I make it even and htey both get one!! but It all dpends on what it is!! like I read above Im not getting younger dd shirts when she has a TON of them!!!
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:30 AM   #7
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When it comes to gifts I try to get quantity equal vs. value, but when it comes to other things I buy as the need arises.
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:55 AM   #8
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MandaRenee
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I don't think equality in that sense is necessary. Growing up we realized that there were times that the other sibling got something and we didn't but that there were also times we got something and they didn't. That is part of life.

Buying something for each child every time seems silly to me. Like buying a younger sibling a present on an older child's birthday. Just to make it fair.

My MIL however spends the same amount on everyone at Christmas. She has even bought a package of candy or a pair of socks to make it even.
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Old 05-10-2007, 08:58 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crystalwave
When it comes to gifts I try to get quantity equal vs. value, but when it comes to other things I buy as the need arises.
Oh I do that too with gifts...I spend the same amt for birthdays and Christmas etc Other stuff, clothing and necessities I buy as we go for whomever needs it.
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Old 05-10-2007, 09:30 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crystalwave
When it comes to gifts I try to get quantity equal vs. value, but when it comes to other things I buy as the need arises.
We do this as well with gifts and Christmas. My girls are young so it seems silly to me to buy the youngest new shorts just because her sister needed new ones. She already has a drawer full of handme downs that look just fine, no holes or stains. It might be different when they are teenagers.

My dad is a stickler for keeping things even for my sister and I. When I needed to borow money he wold give the same amount to my sister.
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