I absolutly think society is geared for smaller families. We have 4 children and things like water parks and or musuems must be planned in advance to we can budget for it. Sometimes places like that are cheaper for us to buy a yearly membership if its someplace we will go to more than once in a year.

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DS-17
DD-14
DD-6
DS-4

I always feel like the bad guy for saying no. I tell them this is special family time, but I know that is starting to wear thin.

I have a friend who always asks us to do things and then says "and it's really cheap". yeah with one kid sure and sometimes not even then. She was trying to convince me to do the all day VBS. the 2 1/2 hr version already cost $30 for 3 kids.
forgot to add that this year VBS sent us three M&M mini containers they want us to bring back full of quarters. It is about a full roll of quarters that's another $30.
allgirls

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allgirls, mom to 3 girls

To be honest, the financial aspect really played into our decision to only have 2 children. It of course wasn't the only thing, but it did play a big part. I wanted to be able to afford certain things for my kids. I don't mean bringing them places all the time and buying them tons of stuff. But, I wanted to be able to send them to private school and be able to sign them up for the activites that they want to do and I want to be able to save for college for them.

I have only noticed it with hotels. When I say "2 adults and 3 children" they automatically say we have to have 2 rooms. So, my husband sleeps in one and I sleep in the other with three kids? Or, better for me, if he sleeps with three kids! There is usually one parent they ALL want to go to at that time.

Anyways, that is the time I have noticed it. I say 2 kids when I make reservations. They are only 3, 5 and 7 for goodness sake! Most hotels don't seem to care at that age.

Absolutely! I've noticed that whenever an organization offers a "family" special, they mean two parents and two children. I have four children, so I guess we are a family and a half!

I've been trying to book a hotel online for a trip we are taking and all the programs won't allow putting in more than three kids. At that point, you either have to get two rooms OR you are directed to a phone number to call. When you call in, you are not elligible for the best rates because those are only available online! I don't like to be dishonest, but at this point, my kids are still small and we definitely don't need two rooms.

After having my second child, so many people (including complete strangers) always asked, "you're done now right?" Then when I was pregnant with my third, all the comments centered on "better you than me!" Now that I have four, people just insinuate that I've completely lost my mind and/or that I am selfishly using up valuable resources on such a large family! It's unbelievable to me that people would look upon God's blessings in such a way.

I agree that society is geared to smaller families. We are a family of 6 and have experienced haveing to have 2 hotel rooms, being split up all over the airplane etc. But the worst was when I had all 4 kids in for well child check ups and the nurses just naturally assumed that we had medical assistance for health insurance!!! She was rather embrassed when I informed her that both my husband and I were employed with private medical coverage!!! I don't like it when strangers make assumptions based on the number of children we have. I am grateful to have 4 healthy, happy children and thankful to be able to provide for them.

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AMOAMOM :love:

I didn't think I had a large family until it came to choosing a vacation. I didn't realize how many hotels would not let you stay in one room with your family. They expected us to get 2 separate rooms. My children are only 7, 5, and 3. I don't want to be separated from them during our family vacation. Even Disney does this. There are only a couple of Disney Resorts that will let all of us stay together and they are not the least expensive ones either.

Looking back do you think in part society's reason for having big families has changed. My Great grandmothers had big families. Why for a number of reason. First lack of Birth control. 2nd higher child mortality rate. 3rd you needed kids to help around the home, run the family buisness or work on the family farm. You take my grandmothers as teens they worked not to afford the latest designer jeans but to help buy groceries. Kids would be taught to knit or sew because it was a useful skill. So the reasons have changed.

1. We now have the option to have family planning to say ok that it or to say lets have another one
2. Better medical care we have so many things that we no longer worry about. When our child gets sick you have treatments that work. So having just 2 children you no longer have the worry that they are going to get the flue and die
3. Kids are not given as much responsiblity at a younger age. You may have chores for your kids but you are not expected to help provide income or service for the family. No its go to school get good grades and learn to be self sufficiant.

So with socities changes it is now more economical to have fewer children so many are now satisfied with 2 that the 4 person family has become the norm. Buisnesses then cater to the norm. I think part of having a large family now a days means that you also have to budget for them. Budget for the extra it will cost for events, budget for having to buy more car seats, an extra hotel room. And unless you are really prone to getting pregnant on birthcontrol or have a multiple birth. You plan for the big family and have to take in the expences that come with having a big family.

Ok so I have gone off on why I feel things have changed. I want to do a side note and mention that I am hoping for a big family (my dad expects 12 grandkids from 2 daughters) but it will be a finanical choice to have a 3rd or 4th child, we will have to account for the fact that so many things will cost more. People shouldn't look down on big families who can afford to take care or there kids.

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Kimberly Proud Mommy to Bethany Rose April 2006 &

Organizer of the Coupon Clippers of Tacoma