OUR money gets deposited into OUR bank account each month!
I take care of the bills and he's in charge of withdrawing cash once a week from the bank since it's near his work. I (usually) do the grocery shopping with the cash, and anything left over is split 50/50 between us! It's OUR money 100%! If your dh doesn't see it that way (or you for that matter), just sit down and figure out what you'd pay someone to watch your kids during a month, then what you'd have to pay a cleaning lady, then a chauffeur, then a nurse, and an accountant, and a cook... what else do SAHM's do... In the end you could start referring to it as YOUR money!

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Well, this is my 2nd marriage and we have HIS money and MY money. We share a checking account but I use my money to pay my bills and he uses it to pay his bills. It really is ridiculous b/c I have never done it this way before but this is the way he has always been and it will never change. If i am broke and want to buy a freakin candle at the dollar store i just go w/out b/c in his eyes that is not a necessity and he would never give me a few bucks for that. I do wish it was different but after 3 years i have become used to it. If I NEED some money for something like a bill that is due then he will float me the $$ until I pay him back. SOOOO stupid but anyways...
I don't work so the only $$ i get is child support from the ex which is really crap for 4 kids. I do sub at school but that does not add up to much either. I just do the best I can. In my 1st marriage it was OUR $$$ and that is the way my parents always done it. I'm getting used to it. But i still don't like it.

This is my 2nd marriage also and for both my marriages we have had our own money and accounts. Neither of my husbands have been good with money and neither of them are willing to let me handle "their"money even though I am excellent with money and paying bills and saving. I have been asking dh when he is going to let me handle the money and bills but he always changes the subject so I just go about my business.

It is my opinion that the pay for being a SAHM is priceless. Your DH couldn't pay you what you will be worth!

When we have the funds, my DH and I get an allowance (like $5 or $10 per paycheck). We can save it or blow it! We live very frugally, so most of our purchases are necessary -- no need to discuss whether we should or should not spend.

As far as dividing up the responsiblities, I tell my DS -- Dad's job is to go to work and make money; Mom's job is to take care of the house and our family; and your job is to do your best in school.

Marlene

I'm in control of our finances...and the same applies here. It is "our" money. He works hard going to work everyday to bring home the bacon, and I work just as hard taking care of our home, family and making sure I stretch every dollar the best I can. If you need to feel like that sense of independence though, you could always have yard sales, pick up on the occasional babysitting gig, or clean homes. There are so many ways to make that side money. Congrats on becoming a SAHM...It is hard but so rewarding.