On the one hand, staying home when your kids are young is an experience you'll never be able to duplicate. On the other, is it responsible to do it when you can't afford it? What are your feelings about this?

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In my opinion it was a choice we made and figured out if we could afford it before we actually did it. And then just learned how to tailor our spending habits to be able to keep me here. Hence, the credit card debt
But -- in hind sight, we knew what we were up against but still chose it and we know that it is not something in our cards right now for me to go back to work -- with childcare and gas costs alone.

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I think it all depends. Me, personally, I do not have the mentality to be a SAHM. And yes, I do love my kids more than life itself. But, I went to college for a reason. I love what I do for a living. I enjoy the challenge. Do I love going to work every day? No.....but, I am sure that there are SAHMs out there that do NOT enjoy staying home every day either. You can try to avoid debt, but you have to do what you have to do to provide, therefore, cc are an option in some households. But, that's the opinion I took with daycare. It's soemthing that I will pay only for a short amount of time, not the rest of my life. So, we jsut decided to pay it and enjoy it when we don't have it any more. My kids did not "suffer" by me not being home with them before being old enough to go to school. My kids are both very intelligent (both to intelligent for their own good!) and get honor role in school. So, I think it all depends on what each household wants to do.

I was so confused when I had my first and I knew I HAD to bring in at least a little money yet i knew I never wanted to go back to my job working full time. We compromised and at first I got an eveing part time job at Target (what a waste as it was so easy to spend my whole paycheck there) anyway one night a girl I worked with at my old job came through my line, we chatted and she was looking for a sitter I gave her my # and it all worked out great so I have the best of both worlds staying home and yet making extra money.

I think its very noble to want to stay home but if it takes racking up a lot of debt is it worth it I would say cut back as much as you can if you have to work part time than thats just the way it is. I certaintly would have returned to work full time if it meant losing our car or worse our home and or racking up thousands of dollars on a credit cards. JMO

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I think you should always work at least part time if you can. Maybe find a job that works for your family. I think a little extra money can always help whether that be 10 hours a week or 40. I work full time because we need it, plus I really get a lot of personal satisfaction out of my job. I work with juvenile delinquents and I love it. I like helping them change their lives, it is important to me. I also work the night shift 7-7am so that I wake up at 2ish everyday and have a good 5 hours with my kids before I go to work. I also can be available if they are sick. My husband is home at nights and I am home all day. There is always one of us accessible to them. I think you should work and find a job that works for your family. It is a wonderful outlet. But hey, if you can swing it, and stay at home, go for it if that is for you.

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Thanks for asking this question. I am in constant debate about this. Even trying to be good about our budget we have still Racked up CC Debt 6K this year. Still I don't want to work because I Love Staying home and the activities my DD and I do. If I had kept my job I would be making enough to cover Daycare and commuting cost and maybe bring in $100 a week. 50 hours a week at a job I hated not worth it to me.
We talk about me getting a job but at the same time I don't want to loose our family time in the evening. With my field if I found a job in my field the night shift would not be an option.
So I am torn do I give up staying home or do we continue to refine our spending habits. We should be able to make it work. I have faith in that. Still it is hard when the un planned expences come your way. I feel I will have time when my kids are older and in school to fully pay off all the debt.
You can go back and pay off the debt but you can't make up the time spent with your family

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I would not stay home if it meant that it would put my family into debt, or make life very difficult. It is surprising to me when I read about families on one income with thousand and thousands in debt, or with utilities being shut off, or losing their homes. But everyone has their own way. I just couldn't stay home if it was that much of a hardship.


And for those that argue that the cost of daycare is too much and that it isnt worth it to work, there are ways to make it work... i worked nights and weekends when we needed the money years ago, and I did not love it, but I did it. DH had the kids and made enough to keep us going.

well in all honesty i loved working and i would still be at the job i had if i could afford to work there. i have three kids two would be in full time daycare and one in before and afterschool. i would be in the hole had i kept working. also we don't live close to town so gas would have put us deeper into the hole. we got into credit card debt while i worked full time we even tried part time but still with gas and work clothes i was not making any money. my husband works long hours he has to be to work at 5am and sometimes does not get off until 530 pm and works alot of saturdays so we don't have anyone to watch the kids. so i guess its not a matter of going into debt it was the lesser of two evils at this point. hopefully it will change down the line.

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This about sums it up for my thoughts too!!



I don't know anyones specific situation ,
However I never can understand why anyone would WANT to be home with their kids and Have it be such A financial burden.
I would feel terribly guilty , If I were here only to be HERE with my kids, Meanwhile, I was paving the way for financial doom.

Besides what ever happened to Quality time being better than quanity time??!
Some days all I feel I do at home is clean and Pick up

I am at home all day now only because we are ok Financially now and It is hard for me to swing working with dhs scedule.

I have worked part time most of our 11 yr marriage-
I am antsing to get back now too!!

I love to leave the mommy image at home and be an adult.

It sounds like working makes sense only if you have an education or career that pays well enough to justify walking out that door everyday. If you don't have employment options that pay well enough to cover the costs for childcare, commuting, etc then all you are doing is spinning your wheels.

I told my daughter before she has children to make sure she has an education and a career that will enable her to support herself and her children. It is my personal opinion that if a person does not have the ability to support themselves and their children they should not be having children. Unfortunately she did not listen to my advice, she had her son when she was a sophomore in college. She is now working full time, and finishing her degree online (16 credits) and caring for her son. I help when I can to reduce her childcare costs, her take home pay is about $150 a week over expenses so it is worth it for her to work. If her boyfriend earned more she would be able to stay home but since he has his hands full paying all their bills she will have to work to contribute towards household expenses.