WHY is your Husband buying ANOTHER woman a gift???? That would NOT even happen!!!!

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If you tell your secrets to the wind... Don't be mad if it tell's the trees.

WOW! driving 2 hours to see them? buying expensive things behind your back? calling you a liar? Maybe I'm taking things out of context, but IMHO that's far more alarming than the phone call issue... I would keep an eye on him...

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I agree that you may have a larger issue than just money here. I think you and dh need to talk NOW because he is buying expensive gifts for "another woman". That would worry me and me and dh would be talking TONIGHT, I would demand he be straight with me about EXACTLY what is going on.
This is not an issue to wait out or mess around with.....

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ITs her birthday on the 5th of this month so they came down (2 hours drive) to celebrate it early with us. What I meant to say is that DH can go over there in their house and hang out with them but not me. DH never drove down to their house without me but after this whole phone bill thing he still feel that they are "good friends" but I feel different. Her husband had been back and he doesn't travel that much. DH just told me this afternoon because I confronted him again about it he said that he "thought" they were going to give us the money for the phone bill that's why he bought her the birthday gift. That doesn't make sense to me at all and I know DH he would never cheat on me. Besides they used to be our neighbors here and they were like brother and sister friendship type of thing. YOu know sometimes when one of your family takes advantage of you this is sort of the same thing. But you would never expect it that a family could do that to you. I agree that phone bill is a lost but she came down here to our place and use our phone to call her husband in October because she needed to get away from her place for four days and they couldn't afford to turn theirs back on. So that's the whole story with them. WE've been good friends with them for two and half years and we treated them good and consider them as family but like I said I didn't expect it that it would come to this.

Right - you said it...it doesnt make sense to you, and frankly, it doesn't make sense to me, either. I love my best friends, but no way would I be able to spend that amount of money on them...there's no justification or sense in any of it. He seems to play that game often, and it's kind of scary. He doesn't tell you details and then when you check on it, it doesn't make sense because he's made no sense at all. I don't think you deserve that. It's like he doesn't tell you the whole story.

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I think you need to get to the bottom of this issue, and quickly. I hate to make you paranoid, but it does sound like there is something going on that you may not be aware of. The story your dh gave you about why he bought her an expensive gift just is not good enough.(imo). You need to keep an eye on your dh and this woman.

Yes, hate to start an argument, but you might ask him WHY he feels the need to spend so much on HER behind YOUR BACK. I sure as hell would be asking that right about now! It wouldn't be that big of a deal if he didn't do it behind your back, and you both agreed on it. But that doesn't sound like it's the case. I wouldn't feel comfortable with it, that's for sure. How old is he, and how old is she? That might not matter, but it sounds like he's playing a high school mind game to me.

I can understand your frustration with this...at least to an extent. I think the only thing I can suggest is to first to calmly have a discussion about this, if you feel it's still an issue. The other thing is to perhaps set up some "guidelines" for future purchases (Like to ask the other if they thought this was a reasonable purchase or that $20 is the max on friends gifts without talking about it first or to understand that no matter what someone buys you they will get in return only what you can afford). I'm not sure if personally I would worry about the "other woman" senerio. That is up to you, and I don't feel right about saying anything either way. I'm not sure I can suggest anything about your friend.

I hope you can figure something out.

I'm sorry I really am-I'm mad for you just reading this!

but your dh bought another woman an expensive present without your knowledge. To me that sends a MAJOR red flag! My dh would never buy a gift for anyone without my knowledge (actually he would say hey can you pick up something for so and so) let alone an almost $100 gift for another woman. Do you guys normally spend that much on someone for a gift? If you do then it would be less of an issue, but I can't imagine that you normally shell out that kind of money for a friends present.

Has he given her the present yet? If not, get it and take it back!

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