Dh gave me garnet earrings and a necklace for xmas. they are very pretty but I honestly will not wear them until perhaps his office xmas party 2008. he said he wished he could have gotten my birthstone but they were very expensive. I had just balanced the checkbook and paid all the xmas bills. then I saw the jewelry store charge for $500. Darn, I dont want to go into savings to pay for them. (what must rubies have cost???)

I want to suggest to DH that I return them and perhaps get a massage of something so he doesnt feel like he stiffed me. Is that cruel and ungrateful? On one hand, I know it is, but on the other hand, I really dont need them. I even thought I would return them and buy something similiarly fake at target. too sneaky?

What would you do?

Well, me being the person who is so hurt this christmas by having someone not like the gift I picked for them, I'd say it's rude.
It depends though, I guess. If he didn't put much thought into the gift and just bought the first thing he saw just "because" then, he'd probably understand you wanting something different.
But, in my situation, I spent WEEKS shopping for something perfect and when I found what I thought was "the best gift ever", I was soooooo excited and almost gave it early just because it was so nice. Then to see the face of the receiver as nothing but disappointed when they opened said gift, broke my heart. Never a reaction I expected. I've never had someone NOT like what I've given, so coming from the person in your husbands shoes, you might rethink it. However, men don't get so emotional, so maybe he won't care. Depends on your DH I guess. Good luck with your choice....I'm sure you AT LEAST appreciate the thought...unlike someone I know.

I would talk to your dh and explain that you love them, but would really like to use the money for more practical things (like paying bills!). If your dh is okay with this, then I would do it. I would not sneak around and return them without his knowledge.

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~Happiness is a large family~

It really so depends on the person...you know your DH best, so you can probably figure out for yourself if he'll be hurt or not - kwim?

I definately would not return them and buy something 'fake' to stand in their place...but that's me.

I had the same dilemma last year when my dh gave me a Coach bag...I do not need a $400 bag. I told him if he really wants me to have a Coach bag, I'll just return his gift, head to the outlets and get one a lot cheaper...I really liked what he gave me, but can't justify the price. We returned it together at the regular Coach store. I went to the outlet alone several days later (as it is an hour and a half away...and I prefer to go there on a weekday so there will be no crowd). I got two smaller bags on clearance...They are still Coach, but a lot cheaper. I got my bags and he got more than half of his money back

Reading these stories I am so GLAD That in our Family we give the person an idea of one or two things We really Need or Want!!
We are still somewhat surprised , But at the same time we get what we want and there are NO hurt Feelings or returning Gifts.

I would Never Be in this situation , so I can't really tell you what to do.

I would Make my DH return them cause well, that isen't what we do. and He would Know Better.

I don't think its rude at all to Not need or Like a gift

I think if a Person buys you something to surprise you they should darn well know what you want and they should know Your Feelings about an Expensive Gift you don't Need.

All JMO -

Thats the way we grew up.

Ask and you shall recieve- No surprises.

mine was a gift the receiver asked for. hence, me working so hard to get it, and being hurt when it wasn't a "lightweight" watch.
sorry, it's just rude at that point.
We always give people ideas for gifts, and this is why it's so surprising to me when someone doesn't like the "type" of that particular gift they asked for. Be more specific, or don't get upset when it's not "just right". KWIM??
We grew up just the same.

I agree- that is rude!! But you always will have People like this unfoutunatly .

AKA - My Ex SIL and My bro -

Only they could pick out things for themselves cause they were so Particular it was unreal.
They became Permanant Gift card people- They named the store and We Just went and got it.

Is the style just too fancy for everyday wear? If so, I'd ask hubby if you could exchange them for something you could wear everyday.

At this time of the year, TV commercials hammer into guys' heads that the one significant way they can make 'their woman' happy is to buy them jewelry. The pressure is intense. I know my husband tries to get me jewelry every Christmas - and I truly appreciate it. I know he is trying to make me happy and show me how much he loves me. And we have to keep in mind that if he can 'drape you in diamonds' he is demonstrating to the world how well he can provide for you and the family. It is a point of PRIDE for him.

As far as rubies, yes they are expensive. However, I looked on-line and you could get some nice natural rubie earrings for under $500. You could also get some lab-created rubies for far less.

Whatever you do, smother your hubby with love for him being so generous.

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"I've been rich and I've been poor but independently wealthy is where it is at."

I think that you should talk to your dh about it and just let him know that you would like to return it for something else weather it be more practical or what ever. I for on never get anything like that from my dh so I would be wearing it every day..lol. but I guess I would talk to him first and see what he suggests doing he may be even happier if you returned it for a nice pair of earrings or a pendent something you could wear everyday and enjoy. Yes practical gifts are nice but it is Christmas it is a time of year to be a little frivolous

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