They say you shouldn't lend money to family and friends because of the problems it can cause. I've never had anyone ask to borrow money and if I were, I may or I may not. It would depend on if I had the money and why they needed it. And most likely, I would consider it a gift as seeing it from that angle to begin with would hopefuly not lead to bitter feelings in the end.

My DH lent money to his sister before I knew him and it was a BIG sum. She made a few payments here and there but never came close to paying it back. Then one day when it came up, she said she had paid it all back. It really eats at my DH simply because she borrowed it, promised to pay it back, never did and yet insists that she did. It has really affected their relationship over the years.

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I would only loan money to a friend or family that I did not expect to ever get back. That way, if they don't pay it back, it won't matter. That is just me.

I agree with most of the posts, if you're going to give it, don't expect it back or you will prob have some bad feelings. I don't give $ to most of my family because of their poor spending habits, but if my mom says she has no $, I end up giving her gift cards to her supermarket (that way she won't gamble it away and will at least have some food) But if I gave her $ and she bought tickets with it I would feel bad about it. I also have said no to family members that wanted to go into business (thank goodness I didn't!)

I don't lend friends money. However, I was forced to cover my roommate's rent consistently while in college, just to save my credit since I signed the lease. Sometimes I got paid back, sometimes not. Eventually I cut a deal with the landlord to move into another apartment by myself and leave this "friend" to fend for herself. She ended up stealing some of my things in the end, and I lived alone from that point on (until I got married of course). Haven't lent a friend money ever since, nor has anyone asked me to.

I also do not lend money to family, but will give with no expectation of getting it back at times (if for a really good reason).

I have loaned money to several people (under $20) and have never seen it back. I will not loan money to anyone except for my sister. Maybe my parents if it is a small amount. The last time I loaned my sister $350 to pay her rent one month because she had been sick (so she missed out on a couple of days' work and also had to pay Dr. bills) and she payed it back to me as soon as she could. She really needed it and didn't want to go to my parents so I helped her out. She appreciated it, and worked overtime the next 2 months to get it back to me quickly, even when I told her that she could just give me a little bit back each month. I would loan her any amount of money if I had it, because I know that she is good for it. I would still only do that if she really needs it (food/rent/etc). She is younger than I am (19), and isn't financially responsible just yet, but she's headed in a great direction.

I think people are less likely to pay back for things that they don't really need. I don't think they actually appreciate it deep down unless they are really hard up.

I do agree that if someone borrows money and doesn't pay you back, it's like a discredit to the kindness you showed them. Almost a slap in the face. I would never borrow anything I wouldn't be able to pay back quickly.

This is me too. My Dad has always said you don't loan money you give it to someone. If they could afford to pay you back they wouldn't need money. He also has said if they pay you back consider it a bonus.

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I'm different though because I grew up in a different culture and for me if its family member I would "give" them money if I can afford it and not get anything back in return. Family is family and growing up we didn't have much but we did help each other out.

I don’t make loans, and from what I’ve seen – most people NEVER pay them back. Especially family and friends. You would probably have better luck with some stranger off the street – seriously. My parents have lent money (lots) over the years to their kids, grandkids, others, etc. I don’t think anyone has paid it back. They know that they will never see it again as soon as it leaves their hands, therefore, it is up to them to decide whether that is money they don’t care about losing. I’m not at the stage of my life (yet) where I could ever just be “okay” with not being paid back, so I just don’t lend- not that anyone has asked me for a loan (they have my parents for that, lol).