I was watching the news last night and for the life of me cannot find the article. But they were saying that now a days it is easy to spend $1700 on just being invited to a wedding! WHAT???? That is not even being in the wedding party, just being invited!
Here is the breakdown that I remember:

Engagement Party: You should spend $40 and up

Bridal Shower: $60 and up

Wedding: $100-200

I feel like I am being really cheap when I give $50 at a wedding and that is pushing it too!


I will add the link if I can find it. It was a pretty interesting segment.

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~~Sonja~~

My 3lynns~ Ashlynn-8, Brooklyn-4 and Kaylin-3

Well, everyone who invites me to their wedding....prepare to be disappointed! I've never been invited to an engagement party, maybe it's not in vogue around here.

It really just depends on the people involved, how close you are to them, what your relationship is...we've spent a lot less than that and then also more than that on weddings we've attended over the years.

I just got married in November and to me a $50 gift, was a REALLY good gift!! I did not expect anything from anyone and was very happy with what we received! It was a small wedding though (about 50 people.)

The biggest gift we received was from our parents (naturally.) My parents helped pay for the wedding for our gift and his parents gave us $7000 towards the down payment to our house. That was the greatest gift ever in my book.

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I was talking to a friend here at work about his dilemma about an invite to a cousin's wedding - it could have EASILY cost him a bundle. First off, we're in Detroit, and the wedding is just North of Chicago, so that's 6-7 hour drive. He has 2 kids. So there is gas, and then hotel to spend probably 2 nights there. Food for the stay. Oh - kids aren't invited, so some sort of sitter arrangement once he is there w/ maybe other family members with kids. Then there is the gift. Did I mention it's black tie? He has to rent a tux or buy a suit and his wife would have to buy a whole new outfit (she's a SAHM and doesn't have a bunch of blacktie event outfits in her closet). I told him to send a gift & his regrets and that's what he's doing. Also, "destination" weddings cost a lot.

We travelled to my cousins' wedding - cost us 2 airfares, rental car, gift, and 5 days in a resort because we figured if we were going that far we'd make a little vacation out of it. Definately over $1000K spent.

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I can see that. My girlfriend's step-daughter is getting married soon. My GF's outfit (dress, shoes, etc) alone must be over $500. While she's included in the wedding, her role is downplayed so her outfit is nice but it isn't like she's mother-of-the-bride or a bridesmaid. And of course, that's not counting what her husband needs to wear.

They did send an engagement gift but I don't think they sent a shower gift.

Being that this is his daughter, they are providing a much nicer wedding gift, of course, but a standard wedding gift among my friends is around $100 - maybe a little more.

Then there is the cost of travel to the wedding. The last wedding we attended was out of town. Even though we drove, we still had travel expenses including hotel costs.

Yes, I can see how attending a wedding could easily add up to a couple of Gs.

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"I've been rich and I've been poor but independently wealthy is where it is at."

I'd be amazed if anyone gives me $100 or more at my wedding. I think that's crazy. To me $25 is a decent gift (then again I have never been close enough to even be invited to the shower) so I guess I'm used to that. I didn't rake in a fortune at my graduation party or baby shower either. I think it's unreasonable to spend that much or expect that much from someone.

We've easily spent more than this amount a few times now. The nieces and nephews are in their 20's and starting to marry and none live anywhere close. Between airfare for 7, suite or 2 hotel rooms, food, rental car, gifts, and any other incidentals (clothing, etc.) ...we're way over that! In fact, we'll be doing it again in November.

We normally don't attend engagement parties here they are called bachelor/bachelorette parties. The only time we do is if they are very close family or friend and then you don't normally do gifts.
We have never spent close to that figure for Bridal showers and wedding gifts when we are invited to them.
I would probably faint at the idea of spending that much!
IMO if someone gives you $25 or $50 that is quite gracious.

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Count your many Blessings

No way that's outrageous!

I spent about $1200 for my sil's wedding and all 5 of us were IN the wedding. That's showers, bachelor/ette parties, and the clothes. And yes it was formal.

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AMY