Friendship & Money Issues - Page 2

JVincent · 05-22-2008, 07:01 AM

I think everyone has a friend like this. I find it annoying personally. We all have money issues every now and again, why do we have to share it with everyone? *sigh*
Though at the same time, I do think that friends should be able to talk to each other about these things, maybe just not as often as you are describing.
Personally, I wouldnt give anyone the oppurtunity to judge me about my spending or anything else for that matter. Some things are just better kept private IMO.

jlg264 · 05-22-2008, 10:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by girlscoutmom

I ended a friendship over this issue.

My friend was THE SAME as yours. She would be crying, for real about scrounging up enough money to buy lunch for her kids in the cafeteria, and honestly not have a loaf of bread or PB in the house to make them a lunch. Her fridge was bare, and she would tell me about how she hoped the mortgage check wouldn't clear until friday ( payday) .

Then, after I would worry endlessly about her for days,...

This is exactly how I feel sometimes after I talk to her...she sometimes talks about how she can't handle things and I feel horrible. I guess in a way I'm tired of feeling horrible for her all the time...reading some of your responses has helped me to realize this. I do know what she's going through to a point...my DH and I went through a really bad financial period and hit bottom and it's taken us almost 5 years to climb out of it, but we're mostly on track. I guess it's almost too a guilt trip on me for having our finances in order...I'm not really sure why I feel that way. Anyway, enough ranting...thanks for listening

ChickyHip · 05-22-2008, 11:00 AM

I have a few friends who are like this. I refuse to listen to their money problems anymore. I will be their friend, but they will have to vent their spending habits elsewhere.

Missystuy · 05-22-2008, 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissLucie

Aghhh, I know a girl, who knows a girl, that knows a girl...jk! I know a girl that does this. I just hear her out. That's all I can do. I've exhausted my advice, I just listen and let her vent. I've told her everything under the sun and it seems like she really gets it, but she doesn't. You really can't force your advice onto people, so let her get what she grasps and let go off what she doesn't.

I think alot of times its still people trying to live up the Jones' mentality. People need to have 'stuff' to feel better about themselves, but can't really afford it and thats where all the venting and bitterness comes from.

I'm almost afraid to admit, I think I WAS one of these friends. I used to get real down about not being able to afford this or that when dh wasn't working, and worrying how we would make the mortgage, ect. But when the money finnally came, something we did NOT need would always get bought. Thank goodness for mommysavers. I finnally smartened up when I started reading everyone's stories. I had to figure out for myself. Its still a learning process, and its hard everyday, but honestly, I'm happier now. And I've learned not to complain about money anymore. If I can't afford it, we don't get it.