Yesterday ds and I went to get our hair cut by the same woman, for convenience sake. She does a really good job and is very reasonable. Ds usually does not go to her. I have to mention that I don't want to burn my bridges with this woman as I intend to keep going to her!!!

Anyway, I asked about her kids, one 18, one 14. She said the 14 year old was giving her some problems, thinking that he was one of the older ones (he hangs around with his brother and his brother's friends a lot).

So she said that last week he went up to her and asked her for a beer. Keep in mind, she is much more liberal with her kids than I am! But on the whole, I think she is a good mom. Anyway, she didn't want to make it a temptation thing...so she gave him the beer.

Well, now the 'problem' is that he is 14, and has now told her, "Mom, from now on I'm drinking". She was trying to make it a non-temptation issue, but now it's taken a turn! This is not what she intended!

Meanwhile, my own 7.5 son is sitting right there, listening to how she let her 14 year old son have a beer! Ds has asked for sips, and we've told him that his first sip of wine will be at First Communion. It's not legal to drink around here (beer or wine) until 21.

I didn't want to cause a scene especially with ds sitting right next to me. Dh and I definitely drink on occasion with dinner, and we're trying to teach responsible alcohol consumption. This does NOT include giving it to a 14 year old! I did tell her, and she agreed, that it was illegal and she would be accountable.

Geez, would you have said something other than this? I'm very surprised that ds didn't pipe up with, "It's illegal!" as well, because that's what we've told him!

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There's been a grave misunderstanding

If I had known her better I would have said something but given the relationship you had with this woman? No, sometimes I believe in minding my own business and this would have been one of them. Of course my DH would have said something and completely charmed her in the process because that is just what he does. Maybe it is the difference in approach of him and me.

I would have said nothing. She knows its illegal. The kid knows its illegal. She made the huge mistake of giving it to him and her reasoning is ridiculous. Parents need to parent their kids. And you know he's telling his friends about it.

I would of said nothing,If that were me I would of been embarrassed to even admit such a thing to a friend let alone a client

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And as far as your ds goes, I wouldn't worry about that. My ds is a year older than yours and he has known for a while now that parents make all kinds of different decisions but what other people may choose to do will never affect the decisions that WE make for our family.

As long as she's giving it to her own kid in her own home, it's not really anyone else's place to say anything.
I allowed M'ija to have alcohol in reasonable amounts in my home when she was about that age. I wanted to take away the forbidden fruit allure, and I wanted her to learn how it affected her and what her limits were in a safe environment, not out with someone who might take advantage of her impaired judgement or who might be even more impaired than she was.
Some of her friends' parents had the same practice, some did not. I did not give alcohol to anyone else's kid unless I was told in person by the parent that it was okay with them.

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When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over!
Any time God closes one door, She always opens another, even though sometimes it's Hell in the hallway.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat it or play with it, pee on it and walk away.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, prepare to die. (Klingon proverb)
Don't point. You'll poke holes in the air and all the faeries will escape.
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

ita.

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When I want your opinion I'll remove the duct tape.......K?

I think you handled it just fine. I would have bitten my tongue and not said much about it either.

When it comes to how other people handle their kids (unless, of course, they're standing right next to you beating the child to death) there's really not much you can say or do.

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"Ala-Freakin'-Bama, Roll Tide Roll!" ~ Trace Adkins

I also agree.

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