Lol! Reminds me of my ex mother in law who is an aids researcher and Nurse Practioner! When my ex husband was like 15 he had some friends over and his mom passed out pamphlets about STDS and Aids and condoms! Lets just say his friends were asking her for condoms alot. She got them free from work! I have no idea what I will say or do but Noah is still really small!

It is scary what the world is coming to now. My kids are 3 and 1 but i have 2 older stepchildren. MY SS is 18 today and my SD is 13. We rarely see my SS but my SD lived with us for a while. While she was here the school felt she needed more intense counseling for some behavior issues and emotional issues (mother is on meth and has continually abandoned the children for years). I enrolled her in a program but she had to see the staff dcotor before being admitted into the group and he was asking her all sorts of questions about sex and even thoug hwe both kept telling him she didn't do that, he still ordered a blood pregnancy test and a STD screening. He told me that parents can't see what kids are doing all the time. Luckily both tests came back clear as I had expected but it was a real eye opener.
Personally I was 15 when I was with my first bf and we had all these plans. Now hes living with someone else and while I don't regret what I did I wish I had waited longer and knew what was really going on.

I think it's fine to stress abstinance and your expectations for your child's behavior, but parents also have a responsibility to instruct about birth control. Children need to be informed or they might fall for those "you can't get pregnant the first time" lines. My sister got pregnant the very first time, at age 19, with a guy she had absolutely NO intention of sleeping with. He just really put on the pressure one night and BAM.

Actually, what always had an impact on me was something my older sister told me once she was engaged. She got engaged just as I graduated high school. She'd had several long-term boyfriends and had slept with a few of them. Now that she was getting married she told me that even though she loved the other guys at the time, she was now marrying the one guy who she would be with for life, and there was one gift she could not give to him. That clicked with me. I've only been with 2 men, and I married them both. Although I did not wait for marriage with either of them, I waited until I was sure I would be marrying them.

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You don't need to have sex to become pregnant.

Abstinence alone is not enough education. Pregnancy is obviously a concern, but STD education is equally, if not more, important imo. I've made sure the kids know about every STD, and how it could potentially ruin their lives. Grandma used to be an STD nurse, so that wasn't exactly a difficult point to get across. Our kids have also been taught abstinence, but if they were to choose not to stick with that, I would hope they'd have the education they need to stay safe.

I have two girls so far. My game plan is as follows:

educate them until I turn blue about sex and protecting themselves - my message will be to wait till college (if i can have them hold out that long) and i will stress how not fun it is to have babies while they are still young.

i will put them on bc if i know they are having sex though.


i grew up in the typical catholic fear household. my parents never told me anything except "get preg and you're out of the house" so i spent my sr yr of h.s. having sex and no protection (or using it sparingly and badly) and i wonder how i didnt get prego. i am not doing that this time around.


i commend the parents who are a abstinence only house - thats great that you're talking about it but i would hope that you're also adding in a little reality education in there too in case the abstinence goes out the window some warm summer night when your teen is miles away from your house!

i wont be an abstinence only mom though because in reality, i want my girls to enjoy sex as women. i dont want them to think that holding out for their one husband is as good as it gets...because its a 50/50 shot that it wont be.

I agree with that. My kids are still on the young side for me to be worrying about this, but I do plan to be open with them about it and while I will tell them that I hope that they will wait at least until they are in a long term relationship, I will make sure that they are aware of all birth control options.

I think that alot of the decisions regarding this are also based on how your children have been raised so far. Children that are in a secure, loving home and feel open to talk to their parents about these issues are more likely to make informed and responsible decisions.

I grew up in a house where sex wasn't discussed except to say don't do it. I was raped by my bf at 15 when I refused him and to this day my parents don't know about it. I don't want my kids to go through that. I would love to think that they would wait, and I'll encourage them to do so. But I know that in this day and age abstinence isn't practical as an only means to teach birth control.

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I'm Catholic, and of course we aren't supposed to be practicing birth control...well look at Mass next time and see how many families have only two kids...I guess I'm not the only one practicing it!! Yes Yes I know about natural family planning - but in reality I don't think the majority of Catholics are using that to limit their families. I know Some are, and I think that's admirable.

I plan on telling ds about sex and birth control when I tell him about alcohol...you need to wait, when you are older and can make better decisions. BUT if you choose to drink, and need a ride home you can come to me No questions asked. Likewise, I would have dh provide ds with condoms when the 'respect women' speech comes up from him. YES we want you to wait. YES it is the right thing to do. If you choose not to, do Not come home and tell me I'm going to be a grandparent or expect me to raise another child, I'm not interested. (We'd never disown or not love the baby should one arise!) But be Safe, protect yourself, protect your life and your girlfriends life!! It's not the end of the world to have an unplanned pregnancy. But if I can help prevent the heartache that arises from it, why wouldn't I??!!

My Inlaws did that, and although maybe the *presentation* was lacking, if it saved dh from having a child out of wedlock with a woman he didn't love (or he'd be married to her right now and not me), paying child support for them (taking away from own own child) frankly I'm grateful.

DS is 18 and has been active since 17. He uses a condom even if the girlfriend is on BC.
DD is 16 and started being active this year.They were using a condom "most of the time"
Although, I agree that abstinence is the best idea, I also realize it is not a realistic option in today's society.Unfortunatly, I am simply happy that neither was active at 12 or 13 which is so common here and that so far neither one is going to be a parent soon. Several of their friends are parents already and many of them are proud about it.