How do you deal with that? Do you even deal with that? Ideally you would like them to wait, like forever, but statistically that isn't happening with a lot of kids. And do you treat the issue differently from your daughters compared to your sons?

Currently this isn't an issue for me. I have a 4 year old daughter and (on Sunday) a 1 year old son. But I do wonder what we will do when the time comes. Both my husband and I have worked with teenagers but I also know that it is different when you suddenly start dealing with your own children and not someone else's kids.

My boys are still pretty young so I have a few years. However when it is time I will have no problem talking to them and not that I will give them condoms in their christmas stockings but if I think they are sexually active or about to be heck yes I will buy some for them! I think its better then saying MY son would never do that, thats just naive!

I know of a parent that did that.

Well, mine grow up learning abstinence. I don't think it will become an issue.

When I was a teen, I read an article in a magazine (probably Seventeen ) that offered a list of indicators to judge if you were really ready to have sex. The one I still remember was that if you (as a teen) had not seriously considered using birth control, then you were not ready for sex. This thought has stuck with me all of these years, and I will introduce this idea to my DS when he is a bit older.

The idea that choosing to have sex is a decision that comes with many responsibilities is what I'd like to get across to DS.

If I had a daughter, I would have the same kind of talks, but if I felt she was immature and reckless, I wouldn't hesitate to help her get birth control. I think it is teenage girls who suffer more from unplanned pregnancies, and I would do what I could to help my daughter not have to go through this.

Marlene

Well, with DD being 5 months, it's a bit of time off...

I liked how my parents dealt with it. I knew about the different forms of BC, just as I knew what sex was and what happened. They kind of went hand in hand.

When I decided to start having sex, my bf used condoms, and shortly after that, mom figured it out and told me I had to start going to my annuals. Doc talked about BC with me, which I already knew about the different types, and possible failures. I went on the pill unsuccessfully, and then switched to the shot, which I took care of my annuals and prescriptions from then on out. Until I developed a sensitivity to most condoms, I used the Depo shot AND condoms, or the Patch AND condoms.

I'd rather my child learn about sex and control from me than from rumors on the playground. I'm sure my parents wish I would have waited longer (like til I was married) to have sex, but it didn't happen, and they were wise enough to give me the knowledge and facts so that I could make an informed decision, and NOT end up getting pregnant before I wanted to.

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Our are still too young but dh and I definetely plan on speaking to them about abstinance and birth control. Dh works in L&D and has seen a few young teens come in to have babies, some as young as 13, so we're definetely going to tell our boys and our daughter the same thing. Yes, the girl may be the one to get pregnant but the boy and his family will be effected as well.

It's quite scary how much misinformation is out there. One young man told my dh that his friend's told him if he didn't "nut" inside her that she wouldn't get pregnant.. as he was holding his newborn . Besides pregnancy there are soooo many STD's out there and it's important for us to talk to our kids about them and how to protect themselves from them. I know with dh's experience, he's helped diagnose a lot of "it burns when I pee" issues, we'll definetely push using condoms all the time for both sexes. Even if a girl is on the pill she is still susceptible to STD's and some of them could affect her future fertility and/or the ability for her to carry babies.

nicely written and very true. thanks for the post.

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Chopey

Consdering that we don't use artificial BC, we are going to teach our children the same and explain our reasons why. Dd #1 just turned 10 and so I suppose before too long we are going to have to go down that road. Right now I prefer that they stay as innocent as possible.

Flame suit on.

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Christie

• Married to Mark since 1995
• SAHM to 4 (so far!): Kelly (6/98); Steven (9/02); Brooke (6/04); Michael (9/07)
• Jane Austen fanatic
• Down to 2 student loans (less than $8K total) and mortgage
• Cradle Catholic
• Politically incorrect
• Yankee with a Southern drawl

"Well, mine grow up learning abstinence. I don't think it will become an issue."

One of our grandchildren came into this world because her mother didn't think what she was doing was NOT abstinence. She had already gone through her first year of college and didn't realize what she was doing with her boyfriend could result in her getting pregnant.

I only had to deal with birth control for one of our teenaged children. She informed me that the 'bell had already been rung' (ie: you can't unring a bell) so I took her to the doctor immediately. Sure enough she already had HPV and cervical dysplasia. She started on the pill and I held her hand while she had a LEEP procedure. - sigh -

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