At the library I picked up an American Girls book to read- thought I check them out for the future for dd. Well, the one I picked up was called Big Changes for Kit (something like that), and it was about a girl living throught the Depression. In the opening pages Kit gets a present- a new winter coat that her mom made for her from her dad's old one, plus mittens and a hat knit for her form unraveled sweaters by two friends. She was so thrilled to get these, then gave her old coat to a homeless girl. ACK- it just hit me right in the gut.

Now I'm not saying that I'm going to try to make a winter coat or knit with old sweaters, but GAH- I am so wasteful. My kids are drowning in clothes, I feel like I'm constantly being buried in stuff and junk and having to fight my way out from under an avalanche. I can blame my family for some of that- my mom is always bringing stuff over for the kiids or for me- stuff that she doesn't want anymore (as if I want it!) but really the majoirity of the blame is mine. When did I become so greedy and obsessed with THINGS?

I am so ready to change

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I don't believe in miracles; I depend on them

It is funny you bring this up. I've been thinking about it too, lately. I was listening to the clark howard show today on the radio (personal finance guy) and he asked what is the relationship between money and happiness? "According to Money Magazine, If your annual income is $20,000 or less, you aren’t as happy as someone who makes $50,000 a year. But if your income jumps to $90,000, people are not happier. The idea behind this is that meeting life’s basics is what makes us content. It’s not possible to do at $20,000 a year. But at $50,000, it’s possible to take care of your basic needs. After that, it’s just what we want. The average American is almost three times as wealthy as he or she was in the 50s. Going back to the ‘80s, we’re almost twice as wealthy today. So, although we’re about the most affluent country on earth, our happiness level hasn’t really changed."

So, taking what you are saying in that people did more with less "back in the day" and were content. Why aren't we content? Why do we buy so much. Just cleaning out my DSs dressers in my de-clutter challenge has made me sick. Why do they have enough clothing to clothe themselves for a month? Yeah, some of it was bought by well-meaning relatives. But really, how many shirts does an 8 year old REALLY need?

I hear what you are saying and I think that the start of ending this cycle is realizing that enough is enough. If your basic needs are met, then why do we need the excess?

According to the money magazine article, we are more affluent today than our grandparents and even our parents were, yet more people are living pay check to pay check today. Why is that? I know my grandparents didn't have the stuffitis that my generation seems to have. Even my mom tells me stories of how they just did without a lot when my dad was getting out of college and had just got back from Viet Nam. They only had one TV (with rabbit ears), a few pieces of furniture (that didn't match) and played cards with their neighbors for entertainment. YOu don't hear people doing that anymore...

(ok, i"ll get down off my soap box.. didn't mean to hi-jack the thread! )

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Debbie

"Watch the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves." --Benjamin Franklin

Your not alone.......i'm the same way.

That was no thread hijacking- it was all very relevant. Why is our idea of entertainment shopping? Why do our kids have to be enrolled in every activity under the sun? Why are we always wanting more, more, more?

Around here, a lot of people have boats. Kids are shuffled off to preschool at 2 years old. Everyone is busy- so busy, too busy- buying, moving, shopping, selling.

I know we can't go back to a simpler time (although I'd love to do things like play cards with the neighbors), but I can stop obsessing about having more. I plan to scale way back on the clothing. I have to summon my courage and tell my mom to stop bringing me every magazine she's done with. I have to stop the flood of stuff coming in. I even have to- cringe- stop signing up for so many freebies. They especially are 90% stuff I don't need... I don't need samples of vitamins, bumper stickers, t-shirts, perfume samples. It's fun to get them in the mail, but then what happens to them? They become more stuff.

I can see this is going to be very tough for me. But I am motivated by wanting to spend more time doing things I want to do, not dealing with stuff. Maybe I can change my spots after all (although I am a pretty old leopard- a stuff-a-holic from way back).

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I don't believe in miracles; I depend on them

I think it is bigger than us, so to speak. Marketing starts when they are kids. My boys are 8 now but I admit I had to get everything Thomas for my boys when they were "into" Thomas. Did they really need Thomas underwear, thomas books, videos, shoes etc.? Of course not, and I doubt it really gave them any ADDITIONAL pleasure than say, just playing with their thomas trains. But I got so caught up in it. Why? It kills me now to think of money I WASTED on some of that crap. Now I wonder if I 'conditioned' them to expect name brand things? I don't know. But I know they don't come out of the womb asking for a dora the exporer back pack (or whatever, fill in the blank).

You are right, it starts now and we have to say no more. No more "free" samples that pile up on the countrer because I don't really have a place to put them. Then I have to go buy a basket to put all my free samples in. How are these things free then??!!

It starts now, and it starts one thing at a time. And I need to start planting seeds with grandparents and family members NO MORE JUNK (even if it is well meaning).

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Debbie

"Watch the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves." --Benjamin Franklin

Yes- it has to start with me. I have to place myself in control. I have to get hold of myself and not go into a buying frenzy just because prices are cheap. So what if shorts are 25 cents at yard sales. My ds still does not need 5 pairs of jean shorts all size 3T.

And as for gifts- oh, what to do??? How do I solve this problem tactfully? How do I tell my MIL that I do not want one more hand knitted, hand washable, 100% wool sweater given as a gift to my kids? We live in South Carolina! I know she means well, I know it gives her great joy to make them-- but isn't it a little (just a little) bit inconsiderate of her never to ask what the kids need or want but just to show up with wool sweaters? She knows what the weather is like here.

And my mom- again, she gets great joy from buying for the kids. So we have a million cars, trucks, dolls, etc. I finally told her NO MORE DOLLS. I am sick of picking them up, sick of finding them all over the house, tripping over them, etc.

Really, all I want for the kids is educational type toys or books (no batteries, no electronics, no cheapy plastic stuff). So I figure that when a relative asks what the kids want (not that they ever do- most of them just send stuff) I had better have a reasonably priced list of things for them to chose from. Ex: oh, ds would really love such and such food play set from Melissa and Doug wooden toys. I just saw it on sale at TJ Maxx.

Tacky? Maybe. But I don't know how else to stem the flow.

One step at at time... one step at a time....

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I don't believe in miracles; I depend on them