My son, the Aspie, has a few friends in his class. He is getting good at making friends. There was this girl in his class who had a birthday party the other day. She is a bit aggressive, but otherwise a normal kid, except for one thing: she is heavy. I noticed that during any classroom events, and even at her party, she still didn't seem to have a lot of friends.

I asked DS later if she had friends in class, or if kids were nice to her. He said that everyone pretty much ignores her. She really doesn't do anything to cause it, but she had been "mean" in the past; however, others had, too.

I thought it interesting that yes, the SN kids get ignored often, but the kids that are struck with being overweight can get the cruelest form of discrimination.

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The Really Needy, Special, Networking and Talking Mod

I agree. And it seems to start early with the weight issues. It's so sad.

One quick question about making friends. Was your son always good at it or has he learned to do it? My son has a few friends but he doesn't seem very interested in friends right now nor do they seem interested in him. He was ignored yesterday at the playground with one of his friends and another boy.

I know I have to help him and I will. I was just wondering if you had to work with your son at all. My son is 5.5 right now and headed to K. next year.
Sue

Yes, as my son is an Aspie, we've had to coach him. He was very physical at first, wanting to hug others all the time, practically sitting on top of them, kissing them. We had to work hard to counsel him on that. AND, parents' word is often not enough - he didn't listen at times, until the teachers said the same thing. Both the school and we had to do social stories and role playing for him. It's hard! I've had to invest in books, too.

As he gets older, he is making friends much more easily. It's keeping them that is challenging, because he wants to do things HIS way, lives in his own world and talks about his obsessions. We are working on teaching him how to come out of his shell and reach out to others. He is great in the beginning, but then relaxes. The other Aspies love it, but they typical kids tend to shy away after awhile. I so wish there were more classes/playgroups for this, but the ones in my area are parents who have older kids.

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Dessertmom,
Could you recommend some good social books? My son will be 6 and starting kindergarten in the fall.

Thanks,
Sue