Hi everyone...I am not sure if this is the forum I should be posting in, but I suspect maybe it is.

My 7-year old son has always been a very serious boy. He is reserved, thoughtful, and analyzes everything. He is also quite smart; not genius-level, but very intelligent. What has been concerning me for some time is the level of worrying he does.

My sister told me about the movie, "Little Man Tate", and when I watched it I saw my son in the main character. My son overthinks so many things, things that I don't think is "normal" for a 7-year old to be worrying about! We recently went on a Spring Break vacation, and had so much fun. Every single night, however, my son Joey wept for about 1/2 an hour before bedtime because he was worried that he would forget everything he'd learned in 1st grade (while on vacation)! When my son gets like this, I have tried to console him by reassuring him that his worries are not going to materialize, but I never seem to get through to him. Sometimes I just end up holding him and giving him hugs until he falls asleep.

Other examples...Joey will go to bed at 8pm, fall asleep, and then get up once or twice every night to check and make sure that he put his homework in his backpack, even if it's the middle of the night! Also, he HAS to do his homework every day right when he walks in the front door. This is not something I have suggested that he do; he's made this his own internal rule. If I am unable to help him right that second with his homework, he will get very anxious and usually end up with tears in his eyes.

When he was a baby, he was VERY shy and very unnerved by loud noises and crowds of people. (overstimulated easily) He has outgrown some of his shyness, but he is still very reserved around people. His younger brother has always been the direct opposite. He is loud, social, and happy-go-lucky.

I could go on and on about the worrying he does. Also, he is very particular (read, "anal") about things, and always has been. He HAS to have his food a certain way (sandwiches not cut up, food not touching, etc) and he will never, ever share his drinks or food with anyone. (fear of germs??) I have long since learned that I should never take a bite of his food, because he wouldn't touch it if I did!

I am concerned about him because he is only 7 years old, and life should be fun and carefree at this age! I am also worried that others might pick on him later in life. He's a very gentle soul and would never say an unkind word to anyone, or stick up for himself if need be.

I am thinking about looking into counseling for him. I wanted to post this message here, because some of you fellow Moms might have a child with many of these same traits and might be able to give me some insight.

Thank you!

__________________
My Mama always said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."
(Forrest Gump--1994)

My son has some, but not all of those traits. He worries, but about the wrong things, and it's fanatical. My son has Aspergers, Sensory Integration Disorder, motor skill delays, etc.

I would suggest that you look into a Developmental Pediatrician in your area that can fully test and do an official diagnosis. This diagnosis can also help in school, if any accommodation is needed. The dev. ped. can also help let you know which therapies, such as OT for the "touching" part can help your son.

It does take time to get in to see these doctors, and they should have you fill out a multi-page questionnaire. But ask for cancellations, etc. to see if you can get in earlier. Also, talk with your son's teacher and see if any of this is affecting his time in school. That info will also help the doctor with diagnosis.

Good luck, and let us know how it goes!

__________________
Make someone's heart smile today.

I have a Boo Boo!

Oprah says, "Baby, I'm a-whaunt you!!"
Click here:http://mommysavers.com/boards/announ...tml#post787291to be on Oprah!

It almost sounds like some sort of obsessive compulsive disorder to me. If it continues or gets worse, especially if it's to the point of interfering with his health or well being, then certainly mention it to his doctor. I do think counseling might help, and there are certain medications that can help if it's OCD. Good luck!!

__________________

Desertmom and Aliadam, thank you both for your insight. My nephew has Aspergers too, and my sister has filled me in on all of her worries and struggles with her son. I have wondered about that, but after some research, I am pretty positive my son doesn't have it. However, the OCD thing I have NOT ruled out yet. In fact, I think I have OCD to some extent with some factors in my life too. So, it could have been passed along to him too...

I will call my pediatrician and ask him about a referral to a developmental ped. With his worrying, and now he's not even eating well, I really need to jump on this very quickly and get to the core of the issue! It's become a big concern for me.

__________________
My Mama always said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."
(Forrest Gump--1994)

Well my DH and I had our first meeting w/a child psychologist today to discuss neuropsychological testing for my son. The child psychologist mentioned that children who have above average intelligence are more prone to anxiety. My son gets very worried about things too and always wants to be in control of the situation. He loves to chat w/adults but shuts down when other children are around.

I have no vested interest in the following but would also recommend books and CDs from Lori Lite. Our library system does not carry her works so I ordered some of her products from amazon.com. Through stories she teaches children how to relax, and improve their self-esteem. I think her stories and affirmations help comfort my son.

__________________
Use it up, wear it out, make do, or do without.

WWII saying

Thank you! I went to my Library's website and saw that they had 4 items by her. I put all 4 on hold! They seem like they would be very beneficial for my son, and perfect reading material for us to read together at bedtime. Thanks again for the good tip!

__________________
My Mama always said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."
(Forrest Gump--1994)

I don't have anything to add but hugs. I hope your son feels more at ease soon.

Thanks for the info on the book! JennyH., based on the info you gave, there's not enough that would make me suspect Aspergers in him. Aspergers contains a whole umbrella of characteristics, and in no way are any of us qualified to diagnose it, either. However, because our children have some of the same tendencies, we feel your, or rather his, pain. I just don't want you to ever feel that we are acting as armchair psychiatrists and trying to label your little guy. All we can offer is our support and our experiences.

I'm also soooo glad you wrote this. I've been wanting to see Little Man Tate, and have put it off. I'm going to go seek it out! One word of warning: if a Dr. suggests meds, make sure they disclose everything. I was given Xanax or an equivalent (I think it's a generic) for anxiety and haven't dared try it because I already have chronic fatigue, and Xanax, along with others for anti-anxiety, make one sleepy. No thanks!!

__________________
Make someone's heart smile today.

I have a Boo Boo!

Oprah says, "Baby, I'm a-whaunt you!!"
Click here:http://mommysavers.com/boards/announ...tml#post787291to be on Oprah!

Carlitasway, hugs are the best thing a mom can give, aren't they?

Desertmom, you moms are the reason I love this website! Although I know it's not the same as going to formal counseling, you all offer great support and insight into situations via your own experiences. I'm grateful for that. Thanks!

__________________
My Mama always said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."
(Forrest Gump--1994)

Wow, this sounds so much like me growing up. I really hope that you get this all figured out I was a very anxious and nervous child (and still am as an adult) and I am horrible with social situations, always have been. I would stress about the littlest things, I am also very "anal" (I hate that word but it fits) and always have been. I am going to have to look into this more. I really really hope you get this figured out.