Dumb Question- Cheap, Frugal, or Moocher - Page 2

Spoodler · 08-03-2007, 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crystal ann

I am surprised that seeing as her husband provides so well wouldn't she have the desire to buy something nice for the kids. I love hand me downs for myself but I buy my kid's mostly new nice things but they are always on sale.It is a Joy for me!

I have a neighbor that brings me bags of hand-me-down clothes for dd periodically. My husband also has a friend at work with triplets

...two of them are girls, and I get all theirs as well. I get name brands that I would NEVER buy on my own. I just can't see spending $50-$60 on an outfit for a 3 year old. My husband provides well for us, but that doesn't mean that I want to spend that kind of money on clothes and toys when I can get them secondhand.

I am more interested in early retirement and a college education for DD than a bunch of stuff she wore for 5 minutes.

Sundowner2 · 08-03-2007, 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cookie2

To me, the definition of a moocher is someone who invites you out to lunch then 'forgets' their wallet. A moocher is a person who always seems to show up at your house right at lunch or dinner time. A moocher is a person who tells you they are coming to town to visit you then makes it known in no uncertain terms that they are planning on staying with you, too. Heck, a moocher is a person who shows up at your doorstep, suitcase in hand, without even calling first (emergency situations aside.) A moocher is someone who asks if they can 'house sit' for you while on vacation and you come home to find your refrigerator empty and long distance phone calls on your bill.

Sounds like your friend has crossed over the line from 'frugal' to 'cheap'. Of course, none of us ever really knows someone else's financial situation so perhaps she has very good reasons for living that way.

This is what a moocher is to me. And I agree, sounds like your friend is just cheap, and maybe has just gotten into the habit of it so much that she doesn't realize it might seem kind of... rude(?) at times.

Claire · 08-04-2007, 07:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spoodler

I am more interested in early retirement and a college education for DD than a bunch of stuff she wore for 5 minutes.

AMEN! The only time my dd has worn Gymboree has been in hand me downs! That and Baby Gap. I would rather have her educated in a few years than have pictures of her in clothes that she wore only a few times. (Not that I don't have PLENTY of pictures!)

Jared&Maggie'smom · 08-04-2007, 07:26 AM

I guess I would ask "Do you have any hand me downs that I could buy off of you?" and then just hope that you give me a good deal

But to me asking for the stuff is a little brassy. Just my opinion.

jmp2675 · **Moocher**

I could understand if they where almost homeless but they are not I agree I'd do something special for someone if they always gve me suff.

Julie+6 · 08-04-2007, 07:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by summeranne

I vote for frugal, however the attitude in which she presents the questions would factor into it for me. I don't see a thing wrong in asking without expectation. If she's like a lot of us she'd rather see things get put to use than go to a landfill.

Additionally, for the most part the rich don't get that way by wasting money! You'd be surprised at the penny pinching that people with a large income do.

If she asks with an attitude, or gets mad if you say no, or seemed to expect you to just automatically save things for her and her alone, then I'd start to have a problem with it.

I agree.

Batty · 08-04-2007, 08:09 AM

She sounds frugal to me, but the fact that she asks you directly for stuff seems a little bold to me.

abbysmommy · 08-04-2007, 11:33 AM

I agree it depends on how close of a friend she is. I have a very close friend that buys her dd some of the CUTEST clothes and she is a size above my dd. If she wears something that I absolutely fall in love with I will tell her..."hey, don't put that in a yard sale if that's what you have planned for it, I want first dibs"...meaning, I expect to pay her for the item if all she's going to do with it is put it in a yard sale. However, I don't ask for things and expect not to pay for them and I'd never ask someone I'm not close friends with.

So...if she's not a close friend and she's asking anyway, that's cheap. Also, if she's never offering to do anything in return for you, I do think that's inching toward mooching.

2littleladies · 08-04-2007, 12:49 PM

I have to agree that she has crossed the line from frugal to cheap. None of us can know why but I would guess she has raised to be frugal.

And for the op that asked how her husbands salary has anything to do with it, this is my take on it. IF her husband makes more then enough money to provide for them and she is just refuseing to spend any of it and choses to do with out things that they need that makes her cheap. If she is just wise about how she spends it and is investing and saveing then she is frugal. I think she sounds cheap , buying only 4 to 6 outfits in an entire year doesnt sound normal.

prettyfeet · 08-06-2007, 08:26 AM

I have a friend who asks for things and it makes me uncomfortable. I thought they were dirt poor, but found out that they make 2x as much as we do. I think coming right out and asking is generally not socially acceptable. Of course if a good friend is specifically getting rid of something, I might let them know I want it, but i'd never ask for things otherwise.