I'm new to these boards and I've really enjoyed reading them.

Here's my question: why do I want so much?

I live in a nice house, drive a nice van and my kids are well taken care of. I have the priviledge of getting to stay home without too much scrimping. I have a great life.

But I (and my husband is like this too) want more. I want a bigger house. Or a house with a pool. Etc. All I have to do is start talking about it and he gets on board too.

Are other people like this? (It would make me feel better to know that I'm not alone!)

Is is my generation? We're infinitely better off than our parents. Just want to know if you guys have any insite!

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Ordinary riches can be stolen; real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. ~Oscar Wilde

We talk about this a lot down in the simple life forum... why is shopping recreational, why do we want more, why are we drowning in stuff? I think several of us are "turning the tide"- we are at the point of being burned out by having too much, shopping too much, doing too much. I think the media tricks us into thinking we need more. I think our generation puts more value on things than on relationships. I think people have forgotten how to have fun and enjoy themselves without spending money, and we definitely live in a "keep up" society.

I suffer, too, from wants and "stuffitis", also minor-to-moderate shoppaholism.

But I'm at the point where I think: would a bigger house make me happy? More to clean, more stuff to keep up with, higher utility bills, more yard to keep up... all that would add up to having even less time to do the things I really want to do.

Would a pool make me happy? Fooling with chemicals, pumps, drains, cleaning... or paying to have it done, safety issues... no, that would not make me happier.

I've had to admit that all this stuff isn't making me happier... on the contrary, it is taking up too much free time, and I want my time back.

Each person is different, but you are definitely not the only one affected!

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I don't believe in miracles; I depend on them

No, you are not the only one. I just posted on the fact that I don't need yet another package of .07 crayons, when I already have 10 packages.

I think the suffitis is a product of our generation, and sadly our children are the victims. We are so much better off than our parents, and even our grandparents - I grew up in a small home - and didn't seem to suffer any ill effects. How many TVs did you have in your house growing up - and how many do your kids have now, in your house? My kids are so fortunate to have all they have, yet I don't remember feeling deprived by having less than they do. I agree, it is the media that creates within us this imagined "need", then pitch the products to us so we can solve our "need" issues. Gee, thanks.

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Debbie

"Watch the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves." --Benjamin Franklin

I think you should ask yourself "Why do I want more?" Is it to keep up appearances...to look successful...because your neighbors have something and you don't??? Or is it for a reason such as your family is growing and your house is not big enough...etc.

I truly think that many people spend so much time worrying about what someone else has or thinks about them, that they might not appreciate what they have.

Personally, my husband and I are more interested in quality time together as a family and not having to worry about retirement than having the latest gadget or newest car...but that is just us. For us the choice to simplify doesn't really have to do with money as DH makes more than enough to keep up a nice lifestyle, we just have gotten out of "consumer" mode. We are much happier now that we have, all the excess "stuff" was just dragging us down.

That is great - how did you get to this point, meaning was it a conscious effort or did you have some life event that spurred you to this point? What things did you do to get out of consumer mode?

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Debbie

"Watch the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves." --Benjamin Franklin

one thing you have to think about is what your parents thought of money. money issues often hide hidden emotions. do you feel worthy of your stuff? If you dont feel worthy you keep searching for the next thing to make you feel worthy. I was more like this. both dh and I grew up pretty poor and we are far from it now. we have plenty of family still struggling. I always felt I had to prove I earned it. doesn't matter that I already did earn it. so I kept looking for objects to define who I was. I was always cheap so my finds usually come from Garage sales, but where and how much I brought didn't matter. I was always looking for more. now I am trying to slowly get rid of stuff. I can feel it weighing me down just like spoodler said. and it is hard to give it away but when you do it feels great and then you want that feeling again and again. recognizing is the first step. sounds like we all need a new 12 step program.(trying to inject humor).

allgirls

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allgirls, mom to 3 girls

It's Girl Scout Cookie Time

I struggle with wanting more also, only our problem is we honestly can't afford it. I do okay for the most part but for some reason around PMS time, i have these urges to spend,spend,spend. My mother has always been obsessed with appearances and not just herself but what her house looks like,inside and out, her cars, her possessions are kept in immaculate condition,she likes to brag how long she has owned her appliances and how good they still look after all these years.I hope i don't become like her, but yes, i do find myself wanting to own nice things.
I would love to spend about a week living with the Amish, i think one week with them and we would all be thankful for what we have.They have so little personal possessions,live so simply and seem alot happier and less stressed than us modern women.

i think personally you have to come to a point where you can honestly analyze your life i have come to that point and to be honest things don't make a person...my bro and his wife are the keep up with the joneses type and financially it took 10years but it caught up with them..and now they struggle. we may not have the newest things(not that we would not like them sometimes) but we are happy our kids are happy and my kids respect things and don't expect to get things just cause someone else has them and i think we are doing a good job of setting them up that life is a choice and it is what you make of it no matter what is thrown at you.

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Measure wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money.

sorry, double post.

It has been an ongoing process and we are still learning as we go. It's hard to explain really, it's almost like we just "grew out of it". It wasn't a life event that got us going, we just got tired of all the "stuff" being around cluttering up our lives...Actually...our dd being born and all the crap that kids get from everyone and their brother was a factor in our decision to "de-crap". I mean really...how many stuffed animals does a newborn need???

We also aren't really concerned with what the "Jonses" think, this is a big problem for some people...too worried about what others have to enjoy what they have themselves.

We still have a long way to go but, I can honestly say, I have cut back drastically on incoming junk...buying just to buy, or as a hobby because I can't think of anything better to do. We have also purged mountains of junk. It helps that I sell on Ebay because I can get my shopping fix buying to resell...it's only in my house for a short time so it doesn't count as clutter.