hello... i am annoyed, and i have to vent. my friend is 24, engaged, works at the same place as me and she clears about 1900 a month. her fiance works at a store like best buy, selling appliances and makes about 3500 a month. they had 3 properties, just sold one, moved out of their condo and just bought another house, so all told they have 2 houses and a condo. they also have a brand new car, and a car that is a few years old. they shop like crazy, go on trips all the time, weekends away at fancy hotels etc.there is no way they are doing all of this on their income... they are grossly in debt. and not even 25 yet.

anyhow, i constantly get **** from her becasue she thinks i am bad with my money. i make 1400 a month clear, and i tried to explain to her where the money goes, and she just doesn't get it. i dont use credit cards, i have a student loan payment which takes alot of my income. she goes on tirades all the time about how i am just throwing my money away by not owning a home LOL. ok... i can barely afford the 550 i pay for rent, let alone a mortgage. she tells me it's not that much more expensive. i'm not stupid.... she told me that she wants to see a breakdown of what i spend money on, because there is no way that i can only have 50 bucks a week left for groceries... "like how is that possible, you must be doing something wrong" GRRRR

ok, so if i had money, i wouldn't have spent the weekend sewing my sleaves on my 6 year old winter coat so that i can squeeze one more year out of it. i wouldn't be eating pasta, rice and potatoes to survive.

why dont people understand that not everyone wants to live thier lives stressed out in debt just to give the illusion of a better quality of life? i can't stand the condscention..how do you guys handle it? she's one of my good friends, my gym buddy and my co worker... so i can't stop talking to her lol... any tips?

Well I think she gives too much advice!! I don't know your age, but this seems to me like she is just young and foolish with her $$$. I remember the days of my early 20's when ALL my money went to clothes, meals out and bar hopping! It was much more fun to be dumb and unresponsible!!!

I say just ignore her and keep in mind your goal and the fact that you can sleep at night without the worry of debt... she will figure it out the hard way!

I agree, I think your friend gives too much advice! Since you can't quit talking to her, maybe you could just try to discuss other issues w/her and if she tries to bring up your financial situation again, politely advise her that it has not changed and move on to something else. Eventually she will get the point!

she must have good credit. My husband is a manger at best buy and I can tell you we barely get that a month AFTER all our deductions. and i dont work i stay at home. and like her im 24. We own. only because our market here to rent costs exactly (if not more). but again with owning you have alot of other expenses like yard care (even if you do your own) so i can see the benifit of renting. But I wouldnt blame her age as the reason for he "additude". because again im 24- so is my dh and we have 3 kids, ages 6, 5, and 4. plus a puppy and a cat.

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Stephanie

she's probalby the one who needs advice! haha. have you ever questioned her? i don't think that's right that she questions you.

i would tell her your finances are none of her business and that you would like to not talk about it. she isn't exactly in a great place to be giving advice either. and age has nothing to do with it. i am 25 and we own our own house and this is the second house we have owned, we own our own vehicles, and we have 2 kids. could be that they like their quality of life and don't mind haveing mountains of debt. but its going to bite them in the butt sooner or later.

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Kimberley

"there is nothing to worry about, just plenty to think about" from an episode of Extreme Makeover House edition

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My mouth hit the floor when I read this sentence! I can't believe someone would be so rude as to ask for an actual breakdown of someone else's finances!

I admire you for holding your tongue. If any one of my acquaintances ever asked me to do this, I'd tell them that my finances are none of their darn business (and I wouldn't use the word darn -- I sanitized my response per board rules).

IMO, you should tell this woman that you no longer want to discuss finances with her.

I think you should use her little 'chats' with you as an opportunity to save her from a life of debt! Just ask her how she can afford to buy so many nice things on what they make? Start asking her what type of debt she has! I would just tell her that you're trying to do everything you can to NOT go into debt. You know she doesn't have 2 houses & a condo and 2 nice cars outright - she's in debt up to her eyeballs! Tell her you're worried about them!

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WE'RE DEBT FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

If she's nosy enough to ask you about YOUR finances, ask HER about HERS. See what happens when you line them up together and compare. Then maybe, it will help her see the light.
I'm 26 and Dh is 25, and we own two cars and a house (making payments), but we make much more than her and her fiancee do, and no way could we afford what you are saying they have....the only thing I could think of that would make sense is that maybe they had a HUGE inheritance?? Otherwise, they must have debt up to their eyeballs, like sahmto3boys says.....
EDITED to say that even though I said we make much more, i looked at your OP again, and we don't make MUCH more after all (i forgot the 3500 that he makes), but we make more, but still.......no way.

Unless they have some money you don't know about, they are obviously living WELL beyond their means. I would just make it clear you aren't interested in discussing it with her. I wouldn't compare. You know that you have it together, and she doesn't. No need to lay it all out there, unless she doesn't let it go.

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Vicki
Mama to Princess, 5 and Wild Thing, 3
Progress Since 1/6/09: