Hi there,

I've been a member of the site for several years but have only posted a couple of times - and now I really need help

In the past 2 weeks I've become a Stay at Home Mom which means major changes for everyone but particularly me. It's been a bit of a holiday so far but now I know I need to a) get into some sort of routine and b) need to cut back on spending
Problem is that I don't know where to start with either

I'm a bit all over the place when it comes to getting the house in shape and feel I could spend my entire day cleaning - there's ALWAYS something more to do. I want to spend more time with the kids doing fun and inexpensive activities but I get distracted by housework etc.. Can anyone tell me what their daily routine is like so I can make the most of my time?

My second issue is where to start with the 'spending less' part. I've only recently taken over the grocery shopping as my husband always did it (he really enjoys it honestly) I'm looking for suggestions on where to start cutting back or what areas of spending to focus on. Where are the obvious household overspends (not just in grocery)?

All help appreciated - I think you'll be seeing alot more posts from me in the coming weeks

First of all congrats on the new SAHM status!

Housework never truly gets done in my opinion- especially with kids and husbands! The routine I have is pretty simple- Monday focus on laundry, Tuesday deep clean kitchen, Wednesday errands, Thursday deep clean living room, Friday is better cleaning in bedrooms (also washing the bed linens), Saturday is deep cleaning bathroom, Sunday is my "off" day. Besides that every day I set the timer for 15 minutes and rush through 1 room at a time to "speed clean"- you can break it up and it does not feel like you spent all day cleaning, the best part is that you don't realize how much you can accomplish in that short amount of time!

The biggest place where we overspend is the miscilenious catagory- clothing, household items- all those little things add up (we are working on that one though!)- as for food the best way I can save money is by watching the circulars for good sales, using coupons and stocking up on items that go on sale that we use (of course when they are on sale).

Good luck!

Congratulations! I have NO tips to offer on the housework issue except that if you keep clutter to a minimum, it will be easier for you to keep things picked up and clean. Easier said than done -- I'm still slowly working on that one!

The second tip I have is to STAY OUT OF THE STORES! It's easy to get a bit house-bound with the kids and want to take a trip to Target to pick up a thing or two and end up a few hundred dollars lighter!...I'm still working on this too!

I don't have all the answers and as a busy working mum i need all the help i can get as my husband works away alot (it feels like 99%) and we have 2 boisterous boys. I did find this a great help FlyLady.net: Your personal online coach to help you gain control of your house and home though i have slipped a bit recently

To enjoy your kids and save more money on expenses, with the weather getting warmer, play with the kids outside. Take them for walks, pointing out flowers, birds, etc. Go to the park, play and picnic, even if it is just a towel and snacks. Play ball with the kids. Let them ride their bikes or trikes. Spending time with your kids, playing with them are the things they will remember and it saves tons of money too.

As for groceries, I save just doing the basics, coupons, shopping the sale circulars, keeping a price book, stocking up on things when they are on sale and substituting generic brands for name brands when I can get away with it.

I also buy my veggies from local farmers and farmers markets. It saves a lot of money this time of year. I freeze alot of the onions, red peppers, etc. to use over the winter when prices on these things are sky high.

I hope some of these ideas help you, I know they have helped me.

Firstly, Congrats on being a new SAHM.

Secondly, My routine in the morning is to get my day started earlier than my kids. This way I have my own time to wake up slowly and enjoy my coffee before I am on mom duty. Once my dd's wake up it's off to making them their breakfast..whether it be cereal and juice or eggs and bacon...Once I get them settled into the morning I begin my routine.

I begin with making my "to do today" list while enjoying my cup of coffee. Then I begin with throwing in a load of laundry, doing any dishes that didn't get done the night before and opening up the curtains.

I then make my way to tidy'ing the rooms. Making sure to tell my girls that they need to keep their toys to a minimum. Making sure to pick up toys they aren't playing with. This helps me to keep my sanity. I make sure they can help or contribute to keeping the house tidy. Once they begin to get a little out of sorts with toys and mess I then tackle the duty with them. It gets done faster and happier that way.

Once I'm done with my morning chores. I'll make my way outside to weed the flower garden while my dd's run in the sprinkler. We enjoy a nice cup of lemonade and eat a simple lunch. Once we're done outside we'll come in. Take a shower/bath and ly down for some resting time. While my dd's are resting I'll begin prepping dinner in the crockpot or starting a loaf of bread in the breadmaker. All the while I'm switching out laundry and what not through-out my day. However my last load of laundry goes into the washer at 3pm. This way it's not unrealistic to expect it to be folded and put away before dinner.

Once a week I do make time to wash bedding and clean the bathrooms. Instead of going outside and working in the flower garden I will do my bathrooms and strip beds. My girls help make the stripping beds a game for us all though.

We all make our beds in the morning and dust. It's a very nice start to our mornings.

I do make the cleaning house a FAMILY event with my children. They do everything from helping me mop, to make beds, to putting laundry into the dryer to putting dishes away and they are 3 and 5 yrs old. They don't make more mess for me when helping and this is only because they began helping me with housework when they were old enough to spray a water bottle at the floor

Make it an enjoyable family lifestyle. It will seem more worth it and not leaving you so exhausted of the idea of cleaning another room. I do have my days where I do NOTHING on my regular routine or schedule and I pay for it BIG time the next few days playing catch up.

As for shopping. I personally limit my outings due to overspending due to boredom or moodiness. I am a member of menus4moms and they send me my weekly menu with grocery list and recipes. It works out great for our family. I'm very frugal on my shopping bills so we as a family can enjoy doing something more with our time and money we've saved.

I got our family grocery bill from $500/month to $300/month just by REFUSING to buy convience foods, impulse buys and packaged meals. I bake all my bread, make all my cookies, cakes, brownies..ect and I make full course meals so we'll have plenty for everyone to get full and have leftovers for the following day's lunch.

When it comes to spending time with my daughters. I do all day. I spend quality time with them being a stay at home mom. They are involved in 90% of the housework I do. They enjoy it and sometimes they prefer to bring their baby dolls into the bathroom as I scrub the tub and not help me clean. To me this is wonderful and helpful as I feel I'm doing 2 jobs at once and everyone is happy. When I say they help me do all my housework, that simply means they are near me, beside me or singing to me as I do it.

We do sit down and read stories, cuddle and watch tv and we do act like goofy girls together too. It's just somedays they know it's deep cleaning day and our playtime doesn't come until later in the day.

Enjoy.

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Happily married to my geek
Proud homeschooling, cloth diaperin, attached parenting, slinging, simplier, breastfeedin, sewing mama mades, christian and funky mama

congrats on becoming a SAHM! It does take some internal motivation sometimes, but it's a wonderful blessing!

*disclaimer on the following: It's long -- sorry, but I like to blather a little. Chew it up, and spit out the bones. There might be a few things that are helpful.

Tips on cleaning:

• purge/declutter -- less is more and you can clean quicker without tripping over things
• organize what's left -- makes it easier to clean; with a home for everything, the kids/DH can find things on their own (no "Mommy where's __?) and put them back when they're done (we can hope anyway.. LOL)
• set the timer for 15 minutes -- like pp said, you'd be AMAZED at what you can do when you're racing the clock
• get yourself a bucket for all your cleaning stuff -- dusting spray/cloth, rags, cleaners, etc. If it's in one place, you aren't running from cupboard to cupboard to find it.
• plug into the accountability on Mommysavers -- there are a lot of days that the only reason I accomplished anything (including getting out of my pjs) was by posting what I needed to do and being motivated by others doing the same.

Tips for routine:

• it will take some trial and error to find your smoothest route of doing things during the day
• every night I throw a load of laundry in the washer before bed, and run the dishwasher while we sleep as well. anything that gets done while I sleep is a bonus!
• set one day for your errands. you won't be in the store everyday (risking spending money), you'll have more time to do things with the family, and you'll be able to get your housework done in ample time if you aren't out and about everyday.
• make up a calendar and have the kids pick one fun thing each per week to do together (craft, playing at the park, etc). scheduled fun means you can plan accordingly for meals, housework so you can REALLY enjoy it.
• I made up a weekly schedule for housecleaning. There was a master list of everyday tasks, but then in addition, I scheduled one extra room per day, for a deeper 30 minute cleaning. ex: Monday -- kitchen (scrub surfaces, wipe microwave, quick purge of yuckies in fridge..) I combined my bedrooms into one day and have a day where I wash floors and tackle any random things that come up.

I don't really have a set routine, which I need to fix. I know I'd get more done if I did have one. Right now, I just make a list and try to get it done as soon as possible so I can have the most day left for DS and myself. This summer will be hectic and I'm starting homeschooling DS in the Fall, plus I just joined the leadership team for our MOPS group and DH finally got management of a store, so things are getting crazier! I'm not one who really requires a set daily routine, but it will be beneficial for us all, especially for DS, who's only 3 and functions better when he knows what to expect.

As for spending, do you have an Aldi around? You can get some great savings by shopping there. There multiple threads around here about it. Other tips:

• when making a grocery list, mark the cost next to each item.. ex: juice $2 .When you have everything listed out, if you tally up the cost and it's over your budgeted amount, go back and cross off what you can, and tally up again. No surprises at the checkout. [If you don't know prices on things, pay attention at the store for next time or ask DH to mark your list for you]
• if you don't get coupons in the paper (or yours are crappy like mine), join the coupon train on here or order your coupons from thecouponclippers.com -- match coupons to store sales for the biggest savings
• learn how to play the CVS game (I'm still waiting for a "CVSing for Dummies" book to come out LOL)
• grow as much as you can! a big saver? tomatoes. buy a plant for $3 and yield 50 tomatoes while others are paying $2 for 3-4 tomatoes from the store. start from seed for bigger savings. *if you don't have room to plant in the ground, you can grow lots of things in containers*
• check into AngelFood Ministries (angelfoodministries.com) - worth every penny
• cut back on meat per dish: 3/4 lb burger in spaghetti, cutting chicken breast into pieces stretches further and uses less
• cut out paper goods -- paper towels (my MIL can go through a 12 roll package each week!), napkins (go cloth), disposable plates, etc.
• keep a couple prefab meals on hand for when you're super busy or just really tired and would be tempted to eat out. sure, prefab meals are more expensive than homecooking, but way cheaper than a restaurant tab!
• use 1/3 - 1/2 amount suggested laundry detergent per load
• cut fabric softener sheets into fourths
• buy bread goods at discount bread store; freeze.

Check out the threads around here for more tips!

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I didn't catch how old your kids are, but maybe having them help with a few of the basic household chores would get your cleaning done and get some kid time in at the same time. Even toddlers can help put clothing in the dryer. Alos, LEAVE IT!! My favorite quote is, "housework, when done correctly, can kill you". It never gets all the way done anyway, and if your goal was to be a sahm and not a ft housekeeper, it never will! (imo, of course.) Do the pressing stuff first--the things that have to get done to function, like laundry and dishes--and the other stuff when the kids are napping, or after your dh gets home. (Also remember that just b/c you're staying home now, it doesn't mean that you don't need his help. Even just a little "dad time" in the evening can help you a LOT!)

My good area is not spending money. We live outside of town, so to go to town takes about 10 minutes. That's been a real help for me to stay home, esp. w/the gas prices. I only go to town once/wk other than church. Grocery shopping doesn't really need to happen more than that, even for the sake of fresh produce. Read the store circulars, decide which day is the best for sales, make a list, and stick to it!! The list thing really helps as well. If you didn't miss it at home before you got to the store, you probably won't miss it at home if you leave it in the store. That also helps with simplifying your living. When I do this, if I keep thinking about the item during the next week of staying home, I go ahead and get it to avoid feeling punished or deprived, b/c that's not what it's all about. There are loads and loads of other things that I began to do since I became a sahm--which require congrats to you, btw, b/c it's the most rewarding thing I've ever done and I hope you love it as much as I do!!--but start small and you'll realize many other things along the way, once you settle into a routine that works for you. Good luck, and keep us updated with how things go!

Ok I have a rather different routine because I don't like staying home all day
Wake up hour of internet time
Get dressed Clean kitchen do laundry
Go to a Moms Meetup (yes I do this every day). There are tons of moms groups through meetup.com I use them as part of my routine. Park dates are free, Play dates are free, walks with other moms are free. It is great to be able to do things with other moms and kids and not spend a lot of time. I get to do things like go to the zoo for free too because I have friends who are members. Staying home doesn't mean you need to be home. Even if its just a library story time once a week getting out is good.
So home Lunch
Nap time for DD
House work for me
Cook dinner
Relax

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Kimberly Proud Mommy to Bethany Rose April 2006

My day is very similar to Ember15, I also do not like to stay home all day, but need to stay out of the store. I get some housework/laundry done before we leave for an activity and the rest during nap/before dinner. I belong to a Mom's group and meet people at the park, we have playgroup or we go to the zoo (if membership is cheap where you live, I recommend it, it's only $64/year here and we go 1-2 times a month). We go to the library, sometimes for storytime, but also to check out books and hang out. I'm going to check out meetup.com, our activities have slowed down lately.
The way I cut down on my grocery shopping, is I have one main trip each week (usually Sat morning so I can leave ds with dh), I plan a dinner menu for the week and have a list. I stick to the list unless I see something on super sale to stock up on. I use cash to grocery shop, then I really have to pay attention to the final amount. If I need something mid week, I have dh stop and get it on his way home from work, I'm lucky that I can trust him to run in and get only what we need.