My ds has just recently started smart mouthing me. It is getting worse. He tries to tell me what to do , when to do it, and how to do it. I am trying sooooooo hard to ignore him. Some days are hard though. I tell him not to talk to mommy that way but it goes in one ear out the other.
I tell him no and he starts this screaming tantrum. (he has never behaved like this) It is horrible. What happened to my sweet little boy?

Is this just a stage he is going through?

Any suggestions????????????????


Carolyn

It muat be a 4 yr old thing! My ds will be 4 soon and he is doing all these things. A friend of mine has a dd the same age and says the same thing! I'm curious too. I've told him I won't talk to him when he talkts to me like that. To try it again. He usually does. I have noticed he is more like this when he hasn't had his rest time.

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"Before I was a Mom I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body." ~Anonymous

Greeetings,

I Am Going Through The Same Thing. Here Is What I'm Doing That Is Working.
When My Daughter Mouths Off Something Gets Taken Away. When She Throws A Tantrum I Don't Acknowledge It. I Ignore Her And When She Asks Me Why I Won't Talk To Her I Just Tell Her I Won't Be Spoken Too Like That And I Don't Like To Be Around Her When She's Mean. When She Can Speak To Me Respectfully I Will Give Her My Attention. I've Been Doing This For A Few Weeks Now And The Mouthing And Tantrums Are Becoming Less Frequent. She's Realizing She Doesn't Get Her Way And There Are Consequences For Her Misbehavior. This Method Might Not Work For Everyone. It's Working For Me Though. Hang In There.

Sydneys Mommy

I read How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. It offers a lot of ways to change undesired behavior. But for now when he smarts you, try stopping him every time and saying, "I feel [insert feeling] when you talk to me like that. It makes me not want to do what you're saying." To start out you'll have to tell him a nicer way to express the thought he's trying to get across. But after a couple of times, after the "I feel..." statement tack on, "Let's have a do-over. What's the nicer way to say that?" And sometimes there won't be a nicer way. And he should know that those comments are hurtful. Good luck! Definitely don't continue to ignore it. This is a test of wills. You're laying down the foundation of how your child is supposed to speak to you right now.

Warn him at the beginning of the day that if he starts sassing you, you will take one of his favorite toys away. If he does it again, start taking snacks, TV time, Computer, anything that means somehting to him. Give it back when he starts to be a sweet boy again. That's what I did.

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I’ve been SWAK’d!
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Thank you for the tips.

I am trying to ignore his behavior. So far I am. Just some days are harder than others.

Thank you all

C

I wouldn't ignore or threaten him. You need to address problems if you want them to stop.

My neice often tells my children (who are younger than her) what to do in a reprimanding kind of way, so I tell her that she isn't a grown up and isn't going to talk like that. Same goes when she says ugly things or mumbles under her breath when I correct her for something. I tell her that she's a nice & shouldn't be saying mean or hurtful things.

Whatever you decide to say, an immediate response is critical.

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Katie
Devoted wife to Michael the architect (12/29/01)
Catholic Mama to Lucas John (9/27/03) and Lilia Mae (12/8/04) and our new baby due next June!
I stay at home; we plan our family & birth naturally, co-sleep, breastfeed/extended-breastfeed, babywear (Daddy does too!), and will homeschool!

Sorry if I offend anyone, but I say soap in the mouth works wonders!!!

I'm gonna buy this book. Thanks!! My 3 1/2 yr old DD isn't too bad just yet, but I see it coming already

I got the book "1-2-3 Magic" by Thomas W. Phelan at the library a few weeks ago. It's been a wonderful resource. My oldest dd (almost 5 now) can get very sassy. Now, I just tell her "That's a 1 (or a 2 or a 3)." and if she gets to 3, then she gets a time out. If she won't go, then I take her there myself. Usually by time her time out is over, she's much better. I've seen a huge difference in her behavior since I've started implementing the techniques, and her tantrums diffuse much more quickly. Good luck!

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