Should I say something about none of my business?

Stormy · **Should I say something about none of my business?**

This is bugging me about a friend, but it truly is none of my business. Do I say anything?

My friends have a little girl who is small for her age, age 3. She is already in preschool and developmentally advanced for her age. However, they still have her in a crib. They say it's 'easier' which yes it is (she can't get out and roam around) but at 3 and in preschool? Isn't that a bit old just for your convenience?

Like I said, I know this is none of my business. Should I just shut my mouth or casually bring it up? I know you ladies will be honest!!

calmingweight · 04-26-2007, 05:10 PM

I would say if it doesn't directly effect YOU or YOUR family, don't get involved. Pick your battles wisely, don't risk losing a friendship over an opinion. Just my .02.

GoPytn07 · 04-26-2007, 05:13 PM

I don't know if you should bring it up or not. How close are you with this friend? My dd will be 3 next week, and she weighs about 24 pounds, she's in the lower percentile for her age group as far as growth, but she's a smart little tart! As I read your post, I was looking at her and thinking it would be odd to have her in a crib. I think she'd be miserable, and she'd find a way out, which would worry me even more. I'd be afraid she'd try to climb out and take a tumble out of it. Is this your friend's only child? Does she maybe just not know at what age to take a child out of a crib? Wouldn't the pediatrician be questioning her sleeping patterns and where she sleeps? Mine always does at the well-child visits. For me, 3 is too old for the crib...in fact, so is 2, so I don't know what to say. If it were a close friend of mine, I might politely mention that her child is ready for a big girl bed.

deemom · 04-26-2007, 05:49 PM

If the 3 year old is climbing in and out of the crib then I would say something. I would casually mention that you are concerned she might get hurt and most people do switch to a toddler bed at that time. See where the conversation goes from there.

That's the only way I would speak up--if a child could potentially get hurt by climbing in or out.

BlueJay · 04-26-2007, 06:08 PM

This is kinda a tough one to answer. A lot plays into it. Like how close you are, could this reck the friendship, is the child being harmed, when did she turn 3? etc.

Playing a different side (not what I think per se)- Is the child being harmed by sleeping in a crib? Who says a child has to be out of the crib by a certain age- is it society that says they are not suppose to sleep in a crib? When did the child turn 3? Was it just last week or 3 weeks or 3 months ago? She will not be sleeping in a crib forever. Some people have those beds that convert to a 1/2 crib bed then big girl bed. Someone could agrue that is almost the same (that 1/2 crib 1/2 bed one)
I think if the child is being put in the crib and can not get out and used as a punishment then it would/is harrmful.

beautifulbabies · 04-26-2007, 06:14 PM

I would keep my mouth shut. I think it's weird that she is still in a crib but I don't think it's harmful. If I typed something every time that I thought someone was doing some thing weird on this board, I'd wear out my keyboard!

That certainly doesn't make what the person is doing wrong though or any of my business.

Kellyandgirls · 04-26-2007, 06:14 PM

is the child happy and getting enough sleep? I guess if she is all those things I would just leave it be!! I hae a good friend whos child slept in her crib till she was 4 she did have a bed in the room if the child would sleep in it but she wouldnt and it just was not worth it!!
her dd finally got out of the crib and no harm was done!! everyone stayed caught up on sleep and everyone was happy!! I guess after knowing this I wouldnt even think twice about it!! (unless the child REALLY wanted out of the crib)

stephpook · 04-26-2007, 06:44 PM

My oldest was out of his crib by the time he turned two (to make way for his baby brother), but I have friends whose kids were still in their cribs at 3 or 4. My pediatrician said you can keep your child in their crib until they outgrow it and I have read similar advice in parenting/sleep books (that you can - and some even say you should - keep your child in their crib until age 3 or 4).

If I were you, I would just leave it alone. It might seem odd to some people, but to many others, it is a completely normal thing to do.

EmberNevill · 04-26-2007, 06:58 PM

I say keep your mouth shut. My 2 1/2 year old was still in the crib until we got my girls bunk beds.. She wont be in the crib when she's 8 lol So I wouldnt say anything.

itstinkerbelle · 04-26-2007, 07:16 PM

I agree, I would not say anything either , Emmy has been out of a crib since she was 13 Mo. old! Only because she kept climbing out and I was afraid she would get hurt, maybe your friends child dose not climb out, Maybe she feels safe and sleeps well in the crib.She will eventually get out of the crib...