I am feeling so guilty. I don't think I play with my 21month old son as much as I should. I'm a stay at home mom, I feel like I SHOULD be playing with him all the time. I get in such a rut & feel like I can't think of anything to play. I probably watch too much tv & get on the computer WAY too much. Thankfully DH is willing to cancel DirecTV for 2 months during the summer. (He thinks he can't live without it during any sports season) So hopefully that will help.

I want to ask other SAHM's, how much time do you spend playing on the floor with your child? Mine is an only child for now & sometimes I wonder if it would be best if he was in child care so he could be around other kids. Because apparently, I'm no fun.

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Mom to Ryan ('06)

I feel this way sometimes too. I think it is just a natural part of mommy guilt. You can't feel guilty about going to work so you gotta be guilty of something! I watch a couple kids in my house and right now have one little boy my son's age. I love having him b/c if I need to get some things done they play together and I feel like ds is occupied. It is not so many kids, though, that we have to stay at home all the time. Do you get involved in any playdates? Or maybe if you did Gymboree or something like that you wouldn't feel like you don't play enough. At least it is summer now and you can get outdoors!

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Children that age DO need a lot of stimulation. It doesn't all have to be you sitting on the floor playing with him though. You can put him in a stroller and go for a walk and point out the trees and rocks. Or it could even be more fun if you had a neighbor who you could walk together with your kids and chat while you stroll.

Or if you have a sandbox, just let him sit in the sandbox and play while you have an iced tea and flip through a magazine. Or invite a friend over and let the kids play together while you two chat.

I know when my kids were small I had a friend I'd meet at least once a wk at a McDonald's with an indoor play area (your son may be too little for this) and we'd let them play while we drank diet cokes and gossiped.

You DO need some other interaction, but maybe try to find things that include you having adult interaction while your child is also having a good time. It's hard at this age to meet your needs and your child's. It's just a balancing act.

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The library might be a good place to check out for their little classes My boys always loved those they sing little songs well the moms do but its fun for both. Who knows you might meet someone to hang out with Dont be too hard on yourself!

I think every stay at home mom feels this way at some point or another. There's alot of work to be done in the house and we deserve to rest too.
I think its not the QUANTITY of time you spend but the QUALITY. Dont get hung up on how many hours. Go to him when he cries, read to him, do whatever he likes to do. Independent play is good for kids his age also. He's learning how to problem solve and etc, so dont feel bad. Just do the best you can.

My DS (14 mos. old) won't let me on the computer when he's awake... he won't stop trying to push the keys! And we don't have a television to be a distraction to either of us.

BUT I am still sooo busy doing housework, errands, babysitting, and all of that, so I do know what you mean. What I think helps is to include your son in whatever you're doing so it is still a group activity. Like give him some pots and pans and utensils to "help you" while you're cooking, or let him take all the clothes out of the dryer and make a game out of it. Talk to him about everything you're doing, to teach him new words and concepts. Try to do your TV and computer time while he takes his nap. HTH!

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Trust God. Whatever risk there is in doing so, the risk of not trusting in him is far greater. - Spurgeon

[quote=kmGA;655156]I feel this way sometimes too. I think it is just a natural part of mommy guilt. You can't feel guilty about going to work so you gotta be guilty of something! QUOTE]

I think you are right! If I was working, I would come home without much time to play and feel guilty. My DH says I'm crazy & like some of you said, he says independent play is good for him. I just feel like I should be interacting with him ALL day long.

Hopefully the TV will be cut off (w/DH's permission of course! lol) on Friday! This will help a lot. And I'm about to start teaching Kindermusik this summer starting June 17th twice a week (he'll go with me) so I think he'll enjoy that. I guess I just never feel adequate--there is always something I'm neglecting. I just found it easier to play with him when he was closer to one. My mind has just gone blank on games to play.

Thanks for the much needed encouragement!

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Mom to Ryan ('06)

don't feel bad. My sons are 20 mos. and 3 and a half and I still have blank moments. I will admit that my kids watch too many TV shows and play by themselves a lot. I am trying to structure my summer now so they will have a lot to do.
I am a SAHM/college student online. For all of our sanity, I found a lady who does inhome daycare and my boys go there 2 mornings a week which is when I do my major housecleaning and schoolwork. We usually go on Tuesday and Thursday mornings there. But I think I may switch to Tuesday and Friday so we can do storytime on Wednesdays and free movie Thursdays. Mondays will be for our playgroup and for us to play.
I'm figuring that they can go to the park on wednesday mornings then naps followed by storytime which in the summer is at 3. Then Thursdays we can see the movie at 10 then nap and maybe they can play in their little pool

We do lots of outings. I plan at least one big thing a week. We go to the park, play outside in the sand box and sand and water table, both great investments in my mind. We also have a swingset in the backyard, I have a slip and slide and a pool, plus the sprinkler is great.

We are taking swim class this summer, you could do a mommy and me class and that usually lasts for a couple of weeks, I saw the library, we go to indoor bounce houses, and play places. The public pool and splash parks (these are free). We go to the zoo alot, we have a pass. Mommy groups are great. They do lots of fun play dates and meet places too.

I remember when I first started staying at home, I really got in a rut. I started making a weekly plan and started having lots of fun and most of the time it was just me and my kiddo. Good luck, just a couple hours out each day make all the difference in the world for me.

Yes, it makes a big difference when we get to get out of the house. My son & I go to the mall's play area (especially for toddlers...soft BIG toys to climb on). We've stayed in there for an hour or two several times. The only thing is the closest mall (or ANYthing to do) is in a town 30 minutes away. I feel so guilty using up gas. I only allow myself to go there once a week. And unfortunatly there aren't any "mommy groups" in my town. The only one I know of is for homeschooled kids (which is too old for my 21 month old).

I like the idea about the sand & water table. I know I've seen this at Wal-Mart. Where did you get yours? How much was it (if u don't mind me asking?) I need to invest in some outdoor things for my son. The Texas heat is coming soon tho! ugh. It's already a scortcher out there today!

Thanks again for the ideas! I'm really getting a lot of motivation here! Keep 'em coming

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Mom to Ryan ('06)