How long to conceive first child? - Page 3

Annie's Mom · 03-27-2008, 11:31 PM

I'm right there w/ Kelly's Mom! Seriously..my husband just had to look at me funny and I got pregnant and yes....he especially was disapointed that we didn't get to "try." But I will tell you...I think there is something to do w/ the stress level and relaxing. At the time, we wanted to have a baby so we didn't use protection. I really didn't think it would happen that fast so I was kind of like..."Ehh...if it happens..it happens..whatever!" I think that helped. We "did the deed"...so to speak...then I just laid there for awhile..(I heard elevating your behind helps gravity or something like that)....so...I stuck a pillow under my butt! lol

Then when my husband started getting call-backs about a job he wanted...here back east. We were shocked so we were like.."Well we had better put this baby-thing on hold." Well it was too late! That's how I know that Ann was a "One-Hit-Wonder." That's why I call her anyways ;-P.

My heart does go out to all of those who have to wait! I expected to wait and was totally in shock when I found out my daughter was on her way! But I think part of the key is just relaxing, having a good time and setting a goal that won't stress you out. Ex...for our next child...as long as I have a baby somewhere between my daughter's 2nd and 4th birthdays...I'm seriously cool with it! See...so that gives me time and no worries! I'm not planning an exact time so the pressure is pretty much off!

Tonia0702 · 03-27-2008, 11:33 PM

My first kiddo was 6 months and that seemed like an eternity, though I know it is nothing now. I remeber going out and getting drunk after my period started and three days later...was when it happened...guess I just needed to relax. My second, was a wam bam thank you mam...got off the BC and I was preggo....I never expected that....lol

Amber03 · 03-28-2008, 08:02 AM

Well, with my first I am not sure. I know it didn't take very long, maybe a month. I was on the pill and accidentally missed one. With my DH I get pregnant pretty easily and have to be careful. With my first with him I had some chemical burns on my skin and wasn't too comfortable so when all my BC pills were gone I told him that I wasn't going to get anymore. We weren't having sex very often because I was uncomfortable low and behold it only took about 3-4 months and I was pregnant. Then when DD was almost one (december) in September I told DH again I was done with the pill. I was pregnant the following febuarary. Now we have been using condoms but I am freaking out because I am having some pregnancy symptoms. I am still breastfeeding but not as much because baby DS is eating baby cereal. Anyway it takes a couple of months and it may take anywhere from 1 month to 6 months. Sometimes it may take a year. Don't worry too much at this point. In fact I think it helps if you just go with the flow and don't schedule a specific time for intercourse. Relax, because if you are tense about it, it won't happen.

onehappymamabear · 05-21-2008, 04:34 PM

Barginbabe --

I know EXACTLY where you are coming from. I've been in your shoes hun! My dh has never had a high sex drive - not even when we first got together. I know your frusteration. He tells me the same things --he's just exhausted from work. I has always drove me NUTS, felt rejected and very frusterated cause I think I have a high sex drive for a woman. Thankfully not as high since having our lil girl so I can deal with his low sex drive okay. When we were ttcing I told him all about how we needed to have sex every other day while I was ovulating. He never got the picture! Then I was diagnosed with PCOS, he STILL didn't get the picture. It wasn't until he saw my symptoms in black and white in a magazine article that he began to understand. It was also around this time he found a Dr to give him some samples of some "happy pills" to help him out. Not that he had any trouble when he was in the mood but this just encouraged him to be in the mood. Once I started on the Clomid he was all over the schedule -- not that it was fun - really made sex feel like work - but THANKFULLY it only took one month! Now were back to once a month -- twice if I am lucky. I am okay with this because I am so exhausted with lil one.

Have you been checked out? Are you ovulating? Do you know when? You might try giving him a book about getting pg. The other thought too -- does he REALLY want a baby right now? The biggest thing is communication!

My thoughts and prayers are with you!!!

HUGZ!

Jana

bargainbabe · 05-21-2008, 05:03 PM

Thanks for the support.

I asked the mods to delete the entry above because I thought it was too personal, but I feel better knowing that someone else has been where I have been. No, I haven't been checked out to see if I'm ovulating for sure yet. I just seem to have the symptoms (I'm been monitoring my cervical mucous). I just bought an ovulation kit, so I'm going to try that out next go around. If I don't see the LH surge with that, I'll definitely see my doctor.

He says that he wants a baby. I have brought it up several times with him that maybe he doesn't feel ready for kids, but he always says he is ready to be a dad. I wish I knew for sure that he was telling me the truth.

Claire · 05-21-2008, 05:15 PM

I was 29, dh was 34 when we got pregnant with #1. It took us 6 months, but knowing what I know now, there was a miscarriage the second month into trying.

It will happen. Most people I know are so worried, stressed with the first one that it takes them a bit longer.

But, I remember having those feelings every time I got my period.

SCMomOfTwo · 05-21-2008, 05:22 PM

I had been on bcp for several years, but wanted the hormones completely out of my system, so I stopped taking them for one year. After that year was up, we tried to conceive and got pregnant the first month. I was 30 when I had my first.
The second pregnancy took 4 months to happen. I had my second when I was 32.

ldluvsmc · 05-21-2008, 09:17 PM

It took me 5 months, I was 29, DH 31. I had been off the pill for 3months (after being on it for about 10 years) b/f we started trying. I also expected to get pg right away. Its drilled into you ever since middle school that if you dont use bc, you'll get pregnant so when you stop, I think its only natural to expect to get pg right away. I knew 5 months was nothing but it was still stressful and DH said I put a lot of pressure on him.

I have also learned that its not uncommon for those who get pregnant quickly (or the first try) to have miscarriages. That happened to 3 of my friends. They all got pregnant again and have babies now.

Good luck!

stacia · 05-22-2008, 07:32 PM

I think the more you stress the harder it will be. I would just have fun trying and when it is meant to be it will happen.

onehappymamabear · 05-22-2008, 08:40 PM

Barganbabe -- you're not alone! How long have you two been trying? A good book to educate yourself and hubby is Taking Control of your fertility by Toni Welcher. Good luck with the ovulation kit and dh!

stacia -- oh man if I had a penny for every time I heard the line "relax, if ya stop stressing about it so much you'll for sure get pregnant" I'd be one RICH woman. :-) Not doggin on ya at all -- it's just easy for peeps to say -- especially if ya never had trouble getting pregnant. :-)