My new son is almost 3 weeks old and I have a feeling inside of me that I am not quite ready to give up on breastfeeding, but it may be too late.

Here's the history: my first son wanted nothing to do with it. He screamed, pushed off etc. It was so awful and I gave up within 2 weeks. This time around I knew I wanted to try again. fortunately my younger son was more receptive to try. I don't have good nips. for him to latch onto so once again after a few days he got frustrated and it became a battle. This time I met with a lacatation consultant, read a book, etc. did a lot more to try. After 9 days or so of crying after feeding and then giving up and giving him a bottle I decided I would just pump. It was emotionally exhausting me.

Well... I have been pumping for several days and my milk supply is terrible. I am getting about an ounce to ounce and a half using a double electric pump each time. It is so frustrating! One part of me wants me to say forget it and just switch to formula from here on out, but another part of me still yearns to nurse. I am scared to try again though because it makes me feel so rejected and inadequate when we have a bad feeding session. I also don't know what my 2 year old is supposed to be doing while I am constantly trying to nurse him. Do we ever get to leave the house? Will my infant starve? He likes to suck down 3-4 oz. of formula each time! The kid can eat!

Sorry so long, but does anyone have suggestions? I can't decide if I should cut my losses and move on with life or try again to somehow get my milk supply up.

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Breastfeeding is incredibly enjoyable but can be quite frustrating at times. My son has silent refulx and would cry and arch when he nursed. I wanted to continue breastfeeding but I also felt frustrated and rejected. I wanted to make sure he was getting enough becuase he would only nurse for short periods of time. But, on the other hand, he was alway hungry and always wanted to nurse. Eventually we figured out that he had refulx and got him on zantac which helped alot. It was difficult for a while because like you I have a 3 year old.

Just know that whatever you end up doing will be just fine for your baby. Also, you are in no way a bad mother if you stop nursing. I actually went to talk to someone becuase I was feeling so overwhelemed and guilty all the time for wanting to nurse but at the same time wanting to stop. I finally realized that I had to do what was best for me so that I could be the best mom for my baby and my 3 year old.

You need to do what you think will make you happy and keep you sane.

My son is now 6 months old and I am breastfeeding and giving him formula. Perhaps you can pump every few hours - giving all the breast milk you can followed up with formula. See how that works. If your milk goes down you can always just go to formula.

Good luck with whatever you decide. I wish you the best and I understand how you are feeling.

It's absolutely not too late. When my third child was a newborn I had a terrible time nursing (after no problems at all with the first two). He had jaundice that was not responding to phototherapy so my doctor had me stop breastfeeding temporarily and substitute formula when he was just about 12 days old. I did pump during that time. It may seem silly, but babies can "sense" when their mommy is tense and sometimes it can make them fussy, too. Also, I found that my milk didn't "let" when I was anxious. I'm sure you are feeling frustrated and upset, but if b-feeding is important to you then I would encourage you to give it another try. Many moms successfully alternate formula and breast milk. If you are concerned that baby won't get enough to eat nursing, try giving him a little formula first so he is not crazy-hungry, then switch to the breast. Keep up the pumping, too, to build your milk supply. I actually had much better luck with a hand-held pump by ISIS rather than an electric pump. Make sure you are drinking a lot of water - it helps with milk supply. And if it doesn't work out for you remember that it doesn't make you a failure! I wish you the best of luck - hang in there!!

No way, it's not too late! Not even close. Keep pumping and nursing him as much as humanly possible. Be sure to drink lots of water and oatmeal is good for supply too. You can do it. Don't give up. Good luck!

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Jennifer
dd Sarah 1/4/02
ds Brady 1/15/07

Definitely not too late! You say you don't have good nips. Does that mean they are flat or inverted? You may want to try wearing a breast shell inside your bra. Here's a good article by Dr. Sears on the use of Brest Shells to help flat or inverted nipples: BREAST SHELLS. Another thing you can try, is pumping a little before putting baby to breast. This will help get the milk flowing and get your nipple ready for baby to latch. If baby doesn't have to work so hard in the beginning, he may be able to get the hang of it.

Do not worry about the amount of milk you are pumping versus what you are producing. Babies are much more efficient at getting milk out than a pump is. And, like the others said, a different type pump may work better for you. Also, if you are tense during pumping you will not get as much.

Your older child will soon learn to self-entertain (play with toys, watch t.v., etc.) while you nurse. Eventually, you may want to try reading a story to the older child while nursing. Nursing really doesn't take that much more time than bottlefeeding if you take into account all the bottle-washing, making bottles and feeding baby.

Once you and baby get the hang of breastfeeding, you'll feel much more comfortable with it and will venture outside the house!

HTH Best wishes to you!

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"Fostering Excellence in Intellect & Character"

Drink lots of water and grape juice-and be sure you are getting enough calories and go for it!

The more you nurse the more milk you will produce so it's not too late! Good luck!

With my first I had a miserable time bf. I also do not have the greatest nipples. With pumping I was able to give him breast milk for the first three months!

With #2 I was determined to do it! My nipples were no better this time, but the help that I received was so much better! With #1 we lived in Pa, and with #2 we live in CT.

Every time that I would nurse I would pump a little before hand to bring out my nipples. Then afterwards I would pump to try to make my milk come in more. I kept track of how much I produced each time. For the first two weeks that is all I did. Fed her, pumped, fed her, pumped...

She is only a month, but things are going great so far! I am feeding on demand, which can be stressful, but she sleeps sometimes for 3-5 hours. That gives me time to spend with ds.

Keep trying. Contact a local group for help. There are Leleche groups everywhere, and online as well! HTH

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Jen

Try to relax.... easier said than done

dd #1 was easy and loved to nurse and I expected it to be that way for #2... oh no

I spent the first 3-4 weeks crying, her crying I can laugh now.... but then it was HARD now she is 10 months old and a champ nurser

your 2 year old will find something to do... set him up with playdoh or something he enjoys before you start to nurse. I always asked dd if there was anything she needed , drink, snack before I sat down

either way it goes, you are doing your best, don't let that mommy guilt slip in and get you down

good luck and enoy your baby

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married 8 years to a crazy Brit, mommy to a banana, she is 4 and a pineapple who is 1 year, mommy to 3 ~angel~ babies

It's not too late. There is a whole forum at kellymom dedicated to relactating and pumping. You should get a ton of ideas and support over there. Oh, and if you are looking for any advice regarding the pump, ivillage has an 'exclusively pumping' board. I'm an EPer (exclusive pumper) and have been for the past 5mos. There are even some moms over there who had supply issues and eventually got the baby back to the breast when they were older (I think 6mos). Here are links if you are interestedhttp://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-ppexcluspump:

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Pumping & Relactating Moms - KellyMom.com Forum