Hip Mom Rule #6: Be Interesting

I had had one of those weeks where it seemed like every time I turned around, I ran into a pile of dirty clothes, stepped in a pile of crumbs, tripped over a pile of toys . . . piles, piles, piles. And to make it more aggravating, my youngest was trying to walk and couldn't quite figure it out, so he was attached to the backs of my jeans using me as a giant walker. The oldest was bored of the rain, bored of his toys, bored of his brother not being able to walk. In short, I needed a night out.

I called my friend, also a hip mother of young children. I said, "This week has absolutely kicked my butt. I need to get out. Are you in?" Of course! What mom isn't ready to ditch the family life for a night out with a friend sans children? I was REALLY looking forward to this; I really needed it. We met at a hip coffee shop with low lighting and comfortable couches. I wore a hip outfit that melded with the fun atmosphere of the coffee shop. I fixed my hair and make up. I anticipated great conversation, new ideas, and a break from the routine of daily mothering.

Instead, we talked about kids, or rather she talked about her kids. The entire time. I kept trying to divert the conversation to the news, religion, taxes, fashion, celebrity gossip, anything that didn't directly involve poop, spit-up, or potty training. The night was a colossal failure. I returned home from my big night out more enervated than I was when I left my house.

Now don't get me wrong -- I love to talk about my kids as much as the next parent, but I crave conversations that don't always revolve around the kids. I crave adult conversation. To get that, I need to have something interesting to talk about. So, I read the paper on Sundays, I belong to a book club and read at least one book a month, I watch a couple minutes of the news each day or listen to NPR on the radio. You don't have to be an intellectual to be interesting; you don't have to devote much time (because, seriously, as a new mom, wouldn't you rather take a nap?), but do enough so that if you happen upon another person craving conversation involving more than diapers and sleeping routines, you can contribute in some small meaningful way.

In short, it can be hip to chat up your little cherubs. It's fun to share the trials and tribulations of motherhood. But it's the hip mom way to have other things to talk about, too, especially if your big night out is with a friend who has her own little cherubs waiting for her at home.


About the Author: Heidi Burns is a freelance writer, editor, and adjunct faculty member. She earned an M.A. from Iowa State University in 2002 and has since married, lived in three states, had two children, and adjuncted for four different colleges. Free time is elusive to her, but if she ever did find a spare moment, she would most likely take a long, uninterrupted nap. For more information and details, please contact Heidi A. Burns.