Hip Mom Rule #13: No Kids' Menu Means No Kids

My husband and I rarely go out to nice restaurants, mostly because after we’ve paid a babysitter we don’t have much change left for a nice meal. Still, once or twice a year we find ourselves in the enviable position of dressing up in our hippest pre-baby semi-formal clothing heading out for an expensive meal at a posh restaurant.

After several months of considering Taco Johns our night out, my husband and I decided that we had earned a nicer evening out without the kids. Taking great care to hide the lingering pre-baby bulge, I dressed in my sleekest black dress. My husband put on his suit and I took great pleasure in straightening his tie. We looked good. The babysitter was right on time. The boys, always amenable to playing with the babysitter, waved goodbye and we were on our way to spend our fancy dime.

We arrived at the restaurant at 7:45 p.m., just in time to enjoy a glass of wine before we were seated for our 8:00 reservation – at the table next to the ONLY table in the restaurant with children – a 3 year-old and an infant. The parents scolded, the children cried, food flew across their table and landed near my feet. The wait staff became irritated, and for many of us, the romantic ambiance of the restaurant was ruined. When our $125 bill finally arrived, we were annoyed and disappointed.

Now understand, there is nothing wrong with parents taking their children out to eat to teach them good manners. I would never judge a parent who brought their children to a hip restaurant for a six o’clock reservation. But if the restaurant doesn’t have a children’s menu, it is a strong indication that children are not welcome, especially for an 8 o’clock dinner.

You love your children and understandably expect everyone to find them adorable, but a hip mom knows that there are just some places where children should not go. If the restaurant offers a kid’s menu, crayons and balloons, by all means, go and enjoy your meal and fear not the wrath of nearby patrons when your child throws a fit. If, however, the prices exceed the cost of your regular babysitter and macaroni and cheese is not on the menu, a hip mom will think twice before succumbing those dining strangers to the pleasure of banqueting with her children.


About the Author: Heidi Burns is a freelance writer, editor, and adjunct faculty member. She earned an M.A. from Iowa State University in 2002 and has since married, lived in three states, had two children, and adjuncted for four different colleges. Free time is elusive to her, but if she ever did find a spare moment, she would most likely take a long, uninterrupted nap. For more information and details, please contact Heidi A. Burns.