Hip Mom Rule #1: It Still Matters

I knew I shouldn't do it. I know better. You NEVER wear brown shoes with a black sweater. But, being 33 weeks pregnant and exhausted from a day of chasing around an 18-month old, I thought, "Who is really going to care what color shoes I have on when I can't even see my own feet?"

So, I chose to walk out the door in my brown shoes and black sweater. Seriously, with a good-looking husband and a cute toddler, who would really notice me anyway?

Once we got to the mall, I became increasingly self-conscious of my poor shoe selection. Everywhere I looked, I saw well-put together women who had chosen to follow the fashion rules. I felt like Janet Jackson after Super Bowl 2003 -- major wardrobe malfunction! I was miserably conspicuous. Women everywhere seemed to wonder what a well-dressed man like my husband was doing with this fashion train wreck at his side. All because I didn't take the time to change my shoes.

The thing with pregnancy and new momhood is that we tend to put others' needs well before our own. By the time we catch a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror, we barely resemble the put-together, hip women that we used to be. Instead, a bedraggled, exhausted woman stares back. At no time in my pre-baby life would I have been too lazy or tired to care how I looked, and it will not happen again.

I won't be "put-together" every time I walk out the door, but I will NOT walk out the door again just not caring. Therefore, I will not leave for Target in my sweat pants. I will not be in my pajamas when my husband gets home from work. I will not go three days without washing my hair, and then cover the evidence with an old, dirty baseball cap. Black pants, black socks. And if this means asking my husband to tie the shoelaces on the only shoes that match that stupid black sweater, then so be it. I am a fashion conscious, hip mom, and kids or no kids, it is time to let the real me back in to the real world.


About the Author: Heidi Burns is a freelance writer, editor, and adjunct faculty member. She earned an M.A. from Iowa State University in 2002 and has since married, lived in three states, had two children, and adjuncted for four different colleges. Free time is elusive to her, but if she ever did find a spare moment, she would most likely take a long, uninterrupted nap. For more information and details, please contact Heidi A. Burns.