Are you a stay at home mom who feels her
brain has atrophied since giving up work outside the
home? If spending day in and day out changing diapers,
making mac & cheese, and playing Candyland doesn’t give
your brain the workout it craves, take heart. You’re
not alone.
Even though staying home and raising your
kids can be one of the most challenging jobs you’ll ever
have, chances are there are things about working that
you will miss. Here are some practical suggestions for
moms who are looking to maintain their sanity and expand
their intellectual horizons while staying home with
their kids:
Get Together With Other Stay at Home Moms
It’s beneficial to build a support system
of other moms who can relate to what you’re going
through. Writes Mia Cronan, "I make a point to get
out regularly and visit with other moms who have small
children. That helps a lot." You can do this on a
one-on-one basis, or join a group.
Chances are there is a playgroup or Moms
group in your area already, but if not, why not start
one yourself? I started a MOMS Club chapter in my area.
MOMS Club is a non-profit organization for stay-at-home
moms. There are over 1000 chapters nationwide. Their
mission is to support stay at home moms through
playgroups, activities, and a monthly Mom’s night out.
Find out if there is a chapter near you by going to
http://www.momsclub.org.
Keep in Touch With Single Friends and
Working Moms
Make sure to keep up with your
friendships with your single friends and working moms,
too. You may not have as much in common with them as you
once did, but their different perspectives can be
valuable. Hearing other points of view can remind you
that there’s another world out there, and help to
reinforce your choice of becoming a stay at home mom.
Kit Fisher writes, "I make sure
that I go out for coffee with my best friend who is
single. It's good to socialize with more than just other
at-home moms."
Take a Class
Whether you’re working on a masters’
degree or just learning a new hobby, taking a class is a
great idea for a stay at home mom. Not only will
learning something new offer intellectual stimulation,
it can provide a night out by yourself, something not
too many stay at home moms get to enjoy. Community
education classes are an inexpensive way to learn a new
skill, plus meet new people in your community. Or, you
may choose to take classes to keep current on your
career while you’re not working. Online classes make
this easier than ever, allowing moms to even earn a
degree without leaving home.
Learn While Your Child Learns
You’ve heard it said that kids are like
sponges when it comes to learning new things. Why not
take advantage of this and learn right along with them?
Find a topic you’d both be interested in. Languages
are great to start teaching children when they’re young.
Check out some French or Spanish tapes at your local
library and try conversing with what you’ve both
learned!
Make Time for You and Spouse
Your spouse is probably your easiest
access to adult conversation and link to "The World
Outside". Take advantage of that fact while building
your relationship as well. Try to spend a little time
together each and every day. Schedule “dates” at home
for after the kids go to bed. Make it a point to do
something together, such as play a game or watch a
movie. Be sure to cultivate your relationship by going
on a date once a month, at the very least.
Get Media Savvy
We’re not talking Pixar DVDs or Radio
Disney. It’s time to reclaim the TV and radio, Mom!
When you’re in the minivan, pop in a book on tape or
switch the dial over to talk radio. Even if you don’t
get to talk back, hearing other adults having an
intelligent conversation can be stimulating.
The computer is also a great outlet for
at-home moms. The internet offers a lot of great
resources and support for parents via discussion boards
and chat rooms. E-mail can help you stay
connected with friends and family, correspond with other
stay at home moms, or keep in touch with hubby while
he’s at work.
Read, Read, Read!
Reading can challenge your brain and help
you keep in touch with what’s going on in the world at
the same time. “I read everything, when I am up to
date on things I feel that I can actually have an
intelligent conversation with someone. Even if I don't
talk to any adults at all- at least I feel as if I'm
prepared!" writes one at-home mom.
Why not start a book club with other
women? Invite a friend or two, and have them invite
their friends to join as well. A book group is a great
way to get to know new women and spend a night out,
too. Having the goal of reading one book per month
forces you to take time for yourself.
As the saying goes, “If Mom ain’t happy,
ain’t NOBODY happy!” Remember to nurture yourself. By
taking time to maintain your own sanity, you’re giving
your family the gift of a better you.
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