The Hazards of Working at Home

Moms that choose to stay home with their kids know what they are getting into, namely, a 24/7 job that offers few breaks sans vacation.

That is why I think that moms who choose to run a home-based business are utterly out of their minds. I should know. I am one of those women. Think challenge to the nth degree.

Here’s a list of things you can count on happening, so be prepared.

1. You’ll buy 12 reams of paper for the printer and fax. Yet the very minute you need that paper there’s only one sheet left and a colossal collection of artwork tacked to the dining room wall thanks to the kids.
   
   
2. You’ll teach the kids to answer the phone professionally—because you never know who will call. Family, friends and colleagues all remark how well trained your kids are when answering the phone. Then, a key person for the success of your business calls and gets “Yeah, what?” from a child with a mouthful of peanut butter.
   
   
3. Yes, you CAN work in your pajamas from home…if you don’t mind being surprised by UPS or FED EX when you’re the least glamorous.
   
   
4. When it comes to Word documents save, save, save as you go because the minute you’re pleased with your work somebody’s chubby little fingers are either going to pull the plug or somehow magically erase the entire document that just took you hours to create.
   
   
5. The minute a customer needs to fax you is the precise minute you discover the kids have used up all the ink and while trying to fix the matter it ‘blows up,’ singeing your hair and awing the kids who all chant, “Do that again, Mom!” And then UPS shows up….
   
   
6. There is no working through lunch or dinner EVEN if the project you are working on needs to be done YESTERDAY. Just ask a brood of kids to wait ‘just a few more minutes’ and you’ll soon feel like the only caribou among a pack of starving wolves.
   
   
7. As soon as your toddler has a diaper blow-out and you’re into it with both hands, the phone will ring, your older child will answer promptly and professionally and then hand you the phone. And then UPS shows up….
   
   
8. Your husband won’t understand why you MUST leave the house as soon as he returns from his away-from-home job…but the singed hair, trail of copier paper and smoking diaper should be enough clues for him to figure it out.
   
   
9. Be prepared to type with one hand while hugging up a clingy toddler who wants you to look HIM in the eye and not the monitor.
   
   
10. Your business cards will make great confetti for toddlers and the perfect ‘tickets’ for the older kids when playing make-believe circus outside...and you'll be running to collect them all right when UPS shows up.